Pandora's Lair
by AlexDonado
Summary: Gon and Killua embark in a new adventure to find Ging Freecs. Many obstacles lay before them, including sorting out the transformation of their relationship. Will they finally find Gon's father? Will Killua be able to fight his assassin's nature? GonXKillua.
1. Chapter 1 - Prelude

Prelude

Some years have passed since they left Greed Island to their continued search for Ging Freecs but the pair hadn't change much at all in terms of personality. Gon was still an energetic, stubborn and compassionate; Killua was still laid back, moody and sarcastic. Their appearances, however, were marked by the time that had passed. Gon was still tanned but now he stood taller at the age of seventeen. His black hair matched the light stubble that was starting to grow on his defined jaw. His muscles once modest in his small body now shone even with layers of clothing on. His big brown eyes, which sometimes looked almost honey colored in the sun, still sparkled with that childlike curiosity. Killua on the other hand, wore his silver colored hair a bit longer and he stood slightly taller than his friend. His graceful frame still hinted his past profession and his cold gaze now seemed more indifferent than ever.

Gon and Killua remained close friends throughout many more adventures during those years. Gon always made Killua see the bright side of life and Killua slapped some sense into Gon. They complemented each other perfectly and raced from one adventure to the other. Still, finding Gon's father always remained they're true objective. No matter how many obstacles they tackled, how many people they met, or how many new things they learned; Ging was always one step ahead.

After failing to find Gon's father for the past 5 years, the discouraged pair followed their next lead. They now stood 14,000 meters in an air ship on their way to Pandora's Lair, an island far to the west of the continent. Kaito had sent Gon a message not too many days ago telling him to talk to and elder that lived on the highest mountain of the island. Unfortunately, Gon found out some time later, there was no easy way of getting to this place. The Island took them on a four day journey on the air ship; followed by a two week boat ride through a very dangerous sea and almost a year of hiking to the mountain, mostly because they could only move from place to place in certain times of the year. Being Gon and Killua, as they read about their journey, they only got more motivated and excited to go on their new adventure.

Now on their last day on the air ship Gon was almost jumping with the anticipation of landing. Killua was out on the deck looking at the distant light where they would land the next day. Gon came rushing to his friend's side; Killua smiled at him as he stood at the very edge of the deck looking at the port that looked like a fly from where they stood.

"Almost there!" Gon said, the hard breeze sweeping his thick black hair slightly backwards.

"Just one more night's sleep and we'll be there" Killua said coolly looking back at the horizon.

"I can't wait to see the hotel. Kurapica said it had the biggest pool he had ever seen!" Gon announced happily to Killua.

"They're all settled in?" Killua asked running his hand through his silver locks.

"Yup! Him and Leorio said they had at least four more days before they head to York Shin city" Gon said thinking back to the phone call he just had with his old friends. He was even more excited now that he was going to get a chance to see them and spend some carefree time with them. It had been a long time since Kurapica took a break from his perpetual quest to round up and kill the Phantom troupe. Gon guessed that since he was with Leorio, who had just graduated from medical school, this was all about celebration.

"I just hope their bar lives up to my expectations" Killua said with a cat like expression on his face. Gon looked sideways at him with a glare of disappointment. Lately his mischievous friend had turned his chocolate addiction to a chocolate cocktail addiction. Drunk Killua only lead to awkward situations as far as Gon was concerned, since the last time he had to use his nen to prevent Killua from getting into a violent bar fight with his own reflection; and then the next day it meant mean, moody, hung over Killua.

"You said you weren't going to drink anymore" Gon said still glaring at Killua.

"Oh come on Gon. Stop impersonating Mito and join in on the fun!" Killua said; the cat like smirk still creeping on his face, "Plus, everybody says that they never drink again when they're hung over. It's like tradition" he added lightly. Gon sighed and shook his head.

"I'm not going to keep cleaning your messes up forever you know" Gon trailed off looking at his wrist watch, "Damn it, Killua we had to meet up with Netero before we went to bed. It's almost ten!" Gon said suddenly overcome by worry that they might leave the Hunter Chairman waiting.

"Oops" Killua said without a note of worry on his voice. Gon glared back at him and then set back into the air ship. Killua dug his hands in his pockets and walked behind his friend. He looked back for a second and smiled. They were going to have so much fun on this trip.

* * *

**Disclaimer : I do not own HunterxHunter.**

**Side Note : Hi to all the new readers! I hope your curiosity has been spiked reading this small introduction (If not, you might risk one more chapter just to make sure XD). This is my own personal fantasy created around Gon and Killua and since HXH is my absolute favorite manga/anime (loving the 2011 remake!) I will try and stay true to the story as much as I can. However the main subject will remain their fast changing feelings toward each other while they set out to a new adventure. Hope you like!**

**WARNING : This story follows the anime, up to episode seventy-something (this was mostly inspired on the remake of the series). If you are a faithful manga reader (like myself) you will find MANY things that do not add up but for the purpose of this exercise, and for the need I have of some characters, the story will be a lets say parallel universe of HxH.**


	2. Netero's Warning

Chapter One – Netero's Warning

The chairman stood looking out the window of the air ship. He had some days left before the new hunter exam commenced and had taken on the task of seeing his two favorite hunters off on their next adventure. He had seen the pair grow up from being two little kids into young men that where still well on their way to greatness. In all his years as a chairman he had never seen anyone with more potential, let alone two of them. However, when he received word that they planned to embark on a new journey towards Pandora; well he just couldn't let them walk into that without a proper warning.

It had been too long since he last heard someone tell him they were after the advice of Pandora's elder. It was said the man possessed one of the most interesting nen abilities known to men. What this was, the chairman had no idea. The man had gone to incredible lengths to protect himself and his power, even to the point of choosing his life of solitude which living on the Lair entailed. He had heard of so many talented pro hunters that had disappeared into this same voyage without ever returning. Most of them had only heard rumors of the power the old man had, and still they chose to throw it all away. Netero planed on providing any help he could to these young boys; he would not give them up so easily to Pandora's clutches. From his window he could see them both on the deck talking happily and then Gon suddenly turning and running with Killua following slowly behind.

"They're on their way here" he mumbled to himself. He walked to his desk and drew out a piece of paper he planned on giving the boys. He sat on a chair and waited as he sensed the two young boys' auras approaching. He heard a sudden noise outside his door and his fussy secretary screaming about the time and how they could not disturb him; a smile ran through his face. That would do nothing to stop them. Surely enough the doors of his office swung open and in came Gon and Killua.

"Netero-san!" Gon greeted happily. Killua walked in a sat on the closest chair.

"Old man" he said nodding at Netero's direction.

"Boys! Ready to set out to Wen city?" he asked and saw Gon nodding energetically and Killua ignoring him as usual.

"Kurapica and Leorio are all set waiting for us. We'll stay at the hotel for five days" Killua answered finally looking at the chairman.

"Good, good. Well I suppose you know that I didn't call you up here just to bid you farewell" he said and the two boys nodded in response. "I have something to give you and then some bad news" he said and their expressions turned serious; Killua shifted in his chair and Gon sat down in the arm rest of Killua's. The chairman returned to his desk and picked up a piece of paper from the table and showed it to his excited audience.

"Is it a map?" Gon asked excited. Killua sighed.

"Does that look like a map to you Gon? It's tiny; don't be an idiot" Killua said looking at the small piece of paper. Gon ignored the insult and stood up to look at it better.

"Killua's right!" Gon looked at the old beaten down paper and then at the chairman. "What is it?" he asked.

"I'm not sure" the chairman replayed smiling. Killua glared at the crazy old man before him. _Why would he even bother us with this?_ He asked himself. The chairman looked back at their expectant faces ready for more of an explanation. "This piece of paper was sent to me by one man that managed to find the elder. This particular man Gon, was one of the creators of Greed Island" he said and saw Gon's eyes widen.

"He's Ging's friend!" Gon said pointing at the paper and looking back at Killua.

"But you don't know what it is?" Killua asked looking back the old man. He shook his head.

"He sent me this along with a short letter telling me that if I ever went on the quest this" he stopped and gave the paper to Gon, "would come in handy." Gon eyed the paper with some strange symbols on it. Killua got up and looked over Gon's shoulder.

"It looks like some sort of writing" Killua guessed. Gon nodded at his friend and then looked back at the chairman.

"I thought so too" he said smiling at clever Killua, "But in all my research I could not find any existing language that resembled this form of writing. Still I think that if you take this with you, you might find use of it along the way" Netero concluded. Both of the boys nodded in agreement and Gon took out his wallet and stashed the paper with his Hunter's license.

"And the bad news?" Killua asked.

"I forgot about that part" Gon said looking back at Netero.

"The Phantom troupe has been spotted on the way to Pandora" The chairman said and a tick silence seemed to wrap the room.

"Kurapica can't know" Gon said seriously looking at Killua. Killua nodded and gave his friend a small smile. He knew that Gon was in no rush to send Kurapica out to get himself killed.

"It'll be our secret" he said back to him and Gon smiled back. The chairman looked from one boy to the other unbelievingly and shook his head.

"More importantly you must be aware that along with the dangers you already face, the troupe will sense your presence and go after you. And with your existing relationship with them, it might not be the wisest choice" the chairman warned.

"Are you suggesting we give up before we set out?" Killua asked, his expression bordering on mocking.

"We appreciate your concern Netero-san, but we can't throw it all away because of a little bump in the road" Gon said shrugging his shoulders. Netero was sure that the phantom troupe was much more than "a little bump on the road" but he knew these kid lacked fear. He knew very well that his warning would not cause them to back down from their goal, but at least they were informed and could take the necessary precautions. Though he sincerely doubted they would work.

"Very well then, I have nothing much left to say but good luck and have a good night's sleep" Netero added smiling and Gon and Killua looked up to him and nodded. As Netero watched them walk out of his office he wondered if he would ever see them again. He knew that if he did, the two boys that just walked out would be forever changed by the scars this trip might leave them. However, he had been proved wrong before by them; let us hope for the best.

* * *

Gon sat on the border of his bed looking at Killua throw his belongings into a bag without much worry about their present state. He looked out the window of their room and saw Wen city's lights shine a bit brighter than before. He looked back at Killua who was changing into his pajamas, his silver locks getting messier as he pulled his shirt over his head. Gon smiled at him.

"Neh Killu" he started and Killua looked back at him, "you think Nobunaga is on the Island?" he asked him. Nobunaga was the one member of the troupe they had had more contact with through the years. He wanted to train them and have them join, even though they had refused him many times before. He just laughed at their insults and said that they would one day change their mind, or he would kill them. Killua smiled at him.

"I hope so" he said and Gon smiled. He knew Killua would love to fight him now that their abilities were much more developed than the last time they'd met.

"Me too" Gon confessed. He lay back on the bed and closed his eyes. He felt Killua sit down beside him. "I just hope Netero-san isn't too disappointed in us for not hearing his warning" he said with his eyes still closed.

"I don't think he ever expected us to Gon" He heard Killua say, "Besides, why do you care what that old man thinks?" Killua asked; Gon felt him lay next to him.

"You shouldn't be so mean to him, he flew us here for free you know" Gon said and looked sideways at his friend. Killua lay with his eyes closed and a small bottle from the minibar in his mouth, draining it down. Gon narrowed his eyes and took the bottle from him.

"Hey!" Killua protested. Gon got up from the bed and threw the empty bottle on the trash.

"You better not be hung over tomorrow" he said shoving Killua from the bed and getting himself under the blankets.

"Yeah, yeah, Mito-san, whatever you say" Killua teased and got under the covers next to Gon. Gon kicked him out of the bed.

"Go sleep on your own bed" Gon said turning on his side. Killua got back in the bed.

"It's full of stuff! Plus, since when have you ever complained about sleeping in the same bed? _I'm _not that one that kicks and snores in his sleep" he said to Gon and turned off the lights. Gon shifted to his side to face Killua.

"Oh yeah? Well at least I don't mumble in my sleep like a mental patient" Gon said and tried not to smile but couldn't help himself. He heard Killua laughing next to him.

"Like a mental patient" Killua repeated laughing, "That's a good one" he said and kept on laughing.

"You're drunk" Gon protested and turned to give him his back again. He slowly trailed off to sleep as Killua giggled next to him, falling asleep himself.

* * *

**Disclaimer: I do not own HunterxHunter.**

**Side Note: Hi! For anyone out there reading this, I hope you like it and don't find to many errors along the way. If you have any comments I would love to hear (or read) all about them, good or bad! As a warning I do plan on giving Gon's and Killua's relationship a mature spin (Yaoi content) so be warned! However I do believe in plot and I've been in love with this series since it first aired and now upon seeing the new and improved version I only wish to further my fantasies I hope to stay true to the original story as much as I can and honestly hope I satisfy anyone who shares my cravings for this dynamic duo. Gon and Killua just seems natural to me. **

**I can not for the life of me find a map I can use as a reference so the names of the cities and their locations are completely fictional.**


	3. Killua's Dilemma

Chapter Two – Killua's Dilemma

Killua looked up at the celling. His heart was beating slowly and rhythmically. He could smell him right next to him but he made no move to look his way. He looked sideways to the window; sunrise was only a few minutes away. Gon was breathing, he was fast asleep. Killua thought that his friend might be already dreaming of landing on Wen city. Killua heard a sigh escape his lips as he closed his eyes. The silver haired boy moved his head to the side and opened his eyes; Gon's sleeping face was only inches away. The island boy was lost in dream land; his lips were partially open and a slight curve hinted a smile. Just like that Killua's heart started to pound harder in his chest. _No_, he said to himself and got up from the bed in one quick silent movement.

He walked to the minibar, retrieved a pair of small bottles of whatever his hand reached first and made his way into the bathroom. He turned the shower on as he undressed. He looked at himself in the mirror.

"Ugh" he let out with a look of disgust. He opened the first small bottle and drank it in one gulp. "Killua stop drinking" he said with a fake shrill voice pretending to be Gon. _Stop drinking_, why did he think he was drinking in the first place? He walked into the shower and felt the cold water trickling through his body. It was his damn fault; he had to be there all the time just staring smiling at him. Who does that? Telling everybody that would listen how happy he was being with Killua all the time because they were the very best of friends. Walking around all the time without a shirt, sweat falling through his muscles, outlining them; showing off his perfectly tanned body and right at that moment turning to smile at him.

_Let's play Killua! Let's wrestle in the mud Killua! That sounds like fun! Let's strip and jump naked into the ocean in the middle of the night! Come Killua don't be so uptight! _Killua wanted to kill him but he had to face the truth. He, Killua Zoldyck, was a huge pervert.

It was his own fault; always hanging around Milluki, spying on all his twisted movies and games. Those life sized dolls. He just had to stick his nose where it didn't belong and now all he could do was think about his best friend, naked, covered in oil, on top of him. Killua turned off the shower and stepped out. He dried his hair with the towel and wrapped it around his waist. He looked at himself in the mirror again. Same feeling of disgust.

He shifted his face into a fake smile and touched his face. At least he would have Kurapica and Leorio to distract Gon for the next few days. Maybe they would drill it into his head that they weren't eleven anymore and should not under any circumstances shower together. He sighed and was about to open his second mini bottle when the door burst open without a knock.

"Morning Killu" Gon said entering the shower and beaming at Killua. He glared at Gon's back. He opened the little bottle and downed it before his friend realized what he was doing. "Did you see how close we are?" Gon asked excitedly as he took of his clothes. Killua tried to look anywhere else but in his direction. "I think we'll be there in less than hour!" he said turning on the shower and walking in. Killua turned his fake smile back into his frustrated glare.

"Mhm" was all he managed to say. Gon stuck his head out of the shower.

"We should head to the pool as soon as we check in!" he declared. Killua smiled at him and then resumed to look at his reflection. He was still nowhere near growing facial hair which being around Gon made even more painfully obvious. He grabbed his tooth brush and proceeded to wash his teeth.

"As long as there's a bar nearby" he let out. Gon stuck his head out again.

"What's that?" Gon asked him.

"Nothing" Killua said.

"Oh" Gon's head disappeared again. Killua heard the water falling next to him and his mind started to wonder off into the image of Gon showering. He shook his head and forced the thought out. He finished with his teeth and threw some more cold water in his face and started to walk out. "Killu?" Gon asked popping his head out once more.

"Yeah?" Killua said turning around. Gon was sticking out more than Killua realized. He could see Gon's whole right side and the water drops falling from his arm and leg. Killua gulped; in a perfect world this is when he asked him to join in.

"Can I borrow your shampoo? Mine ran out" he asked simply. Killua just nodded and walked out of the bathroom. He heard Gon scream thanks to him. He buried his face in his hands. If he could only let go of his addiction and just leave Gon, this wouldn't have to happen every single day. But what would his life be without him? He didn't even want to think about it. He walked to the mini bar and drank the last small bottle inside. At least this gave him some comfort, he thought to himself as he started to feel a slight buzz.

* * *

Gon and Killua walked together into the hotel. It was pretty decent, Killua thought to himself. He looked at his friend and smiled. Even after all these years he still got amazed when they checked into a new hotel.

"Wow Killu!" he said running ahead of him. Killua looked around. The truth was the place wasn't too shabby. They better make the best of it because they weren't going to have such a comfortable ride after they left this place. Leorio had offered to pay and take care of everything since he wanted to celebrate his graduation. They walked to the reception and got the key to their suite and walked to the elevator with a bus boy following them and telling them about the place they were staying in. Gon was hanging on every word while Killua looked out the elevator window.

The hotel used the coastal city to its advantage and had all kinds of tropical gardens and small pools even in the reception. They got to the very last floor and the boy led them to a big set of double doors. Killua let out a whistle.

"Leorio sure out did himself" he said looking at Gon. His friend just smiled back at him. When the boy pushed the door open they saw Kurapica and Leorio look up from what they were doing and smiled at them. Gon rushed inside immediately to hug them both. Killua looked around; there was a balcony surrounding the entire common area and he could see their own private pool. He felt a hand tapping him in the shoulder. He looked sideways at Leorio and smiled at him.

"Hey kid!" he said excited.

"Old man!" Killua said smiling at him. He looked at Kurapica and smiled and nodded.

"All together!" Gon said happily.

"Yes! Time to celebrate! Bring us a couple of bottles of champagne" Leorio called out to the bus boy. The boy nodded and disappeared.

"That's what I wanted to hear!" Killua said now tall enough to put his arm around Leorio's shoulders. Gon glared at him and he stuck his tongue out at him.

"This is the best suite in the place we even have our own pool! Even though the one downstairs is pretty good. We have our own stocked bar" Leorio said walking Killua all around the place.

"Sweet" Killua said walking over to the bar to check it out. He could feel Gon's glare but he ignored it.

"And we all have our own rooms" Kurapica said. Killua felt his heart sink but thought it was probably for the best; that was until he heard what Gon said.

"You didn't have to do that. Killua and I rather share a bed" Gon said and Killua felt his face turning red. There was an awkward pause until Leorio let out a laugh.

"You kids don't change" Leorio said ruffling Gon's hair. Gon just smiled at him. Killua though he might die of embarrassment. He raised his head to see Gon carrying both their things into one of the rooms with Leorio on his side. He looked at him with a bottle of vodka on his hand. He looked sideways at Kurapica who was looking at him curiously. He drank straight from the bottle; he didn't know how else he would make it through this trip.

* * *

"Killua!" he heard Gon scream at him but he just laughed and sat next to Leorio. Him and his old friend had basically downed the two bottles of champagne and hadn't stopped drinking since then. Now they were all down by the main pool; Kurapica and Gon sober inside the pool and the other two drunk in the bar.

"Gon can be such a drag sometimes" he told Leorio as he raised his hand to get a refill.

"It's a celebration you'd think they'd be more into the whole celebrating part!" Leorio said agreeing with him and offering his glass to cheer. Killua laughed and clicked him glass to his friends. "And speaking of celebration" Leorio said checking out a couple of girls that stopped in front of them. They were both in their bikinis and they stopped to smile at Killua. He felt immediately uncomfortable and bored. He felt his smile falter and looked back at where his other two friends stood talking. Kurapica was sitting by the side of the pool and Gon was inside the pool by the edge talking cheerfully. His skin was shining with the sun and the water around him. Killua wanted to go to him.

"Right Killu?" Leorio asked something but Killua had no idea what it was. He looked back at him confused.

"I'm feeling a little hot" Killua said getting up and walking towards the pool. One of the girls grabbed him and looked up at him adoringly.

"Stay, we just got here" she said batting her eyelashes at him. He laughed and slowly pulled his arm away.

"I'm sorry maybe later" he said walking a bit farther away. He reached for his sun glasses and put them on.

"Come on Killu don't leave me hanging!" Leorio said with his arm already around the other girl's shoulder.

"More for you, right?" Killua joked as he jumped into the pool and swam. He could make out Gon's legs in the far end of the pool. He swam to him and popped out right next to him. Gon looked at him unimpressed. "What's with the look?" he asked Gon laughing.

"Weren't you busy with something else?" He asked him. Killua looked back at Leorio with the two girls. He smirked back at Gon and hugged him. He pulled apart and looked at his friends face.

"Don't get jealous" Killua said laughing looking back at Leorio. "They're not very interesting" he looked back at Gon's confused expression.

"Who's not interesting? Why would I get jealous of you drinking?" he asked Killua. Killua suddenly felt his face going red. Gon hadn't even noticed the girls. He felt the sudden urge to run away when Gon put an arm around his waist, pulling him closer, and faced Kurapica. Killua's arms were still loosely around Gon's neck. "He gets so weird when he's drunk" Gon said to Kurapica. Kurapica let out a laugh. He was probably thinking Gon was the most oblivious person in the world. He wouldn't be wrong.

Gon went back to talking to Kurapica but Killua couldn't really focus on the conversation. He was half dancing looking around the pool. One of his arms still around Gon's shoulders; Gon let his arm slip slightly and adjusted his hand on the edge of Killua's swimming trunks to keep it from falling. Killua looked at Gon and he could feel his face smiling. He knew Kurapica was probably looking at him but his drunken mind really didn't care who the hell saw him. He rested his forehead on the side of Gon's head.

"Hey guys! I want you to meet my new friends" They heard Leorio say as he sat by Kurapica and the two girls from the bar came into the pool. Killua turned to look at them not taking his head from Gon's.

"Hi!" Gon said smiling at the girls.

"That's Gon, and this is Kurapica and you met Killua" Leorio said pointing at his two friends. He felt Gon move his hand from his side to offer it to the girls. Killua glared at them through his sun glasses. "You left this at the bar by the way" Leorio said and offered his forgotten cocktail to Killua. He took it and sunk slightly in the pool next to Gon. He hugged his friend's hips and held his drink close to his face. Gon rested his hand on top of Killua's head.

Why did Leorio have to go and bring those two girls over here? They were both looking at Gon in a way that made Killua's inner assassin come out and play. Gon started to stroke his hair and he felt himself relax. He smiled and took a sip of his drink. He felt the drink leave his hand and to his surprise Gon took it and sipped it.

"Hey! You drank!" He said unable to keep his excitement in check.

"Whatever it takes to keep you from passing out" Gon teased, "Plus it's a celebration right?" he added and smiled at Killua.

"Sure, sure. Just get your own" he said reaching out to get his drink back but Gon raised his hand to keep it away from him. Killua didn't feel like leaving his comfortable position next to Gon's perfect abs. He heard the stupid girls giggle.

"So are you two like, together?" One of them asked Gon. Killua felt his heart drop. Leorio and Kurapica just laughed but Gon, shameless as he was, did answer.

"Yeah!" he said and smiled. Now Killua was sure his heart had stopped completely. What did he just say? "Killua's my best friend. We go everywhere together!" the innocent boy replied, which only made all of them laugh harder.

"Jesus, Gon. Do you have to be so embarrassing?" Killua said trying to contain his disappointment. He got up and got out of the pool. He walked himself to the bar and sat down. Why did he let something as small as that get his hopes up and then feel this way? He raised his hand and ordered himself another drink.

"Two" he heard Gon say and sit next to him. Killua looked at him surprised; Gon just looked back at him. "What's wrong?" he asked not taking his eyes of him. Killua saw his friend's image slightly shift and shook his head.

"I felt a bit dizzy in the pool" Killua said nodding at the bar man as he placed the drink in front of him. Gon said thanks and looked back at Killua.

"That makes sense, but I know it's a lie" Gon said sipping on his drink and looking away from him. Killua couldn't think of anything, his head was too cloudy.

"Gon can you just stop being a pain and leave me alone" Killua heard himself say. He regretted it the moment he said it. He closed his eyes and then looked Gon's way; he looked hurt.

"I don't know why you keep doing that" Gon said softly looking down at his drink, "you're nice to me and then you say stuff like that" he added with an even softer voice. Killua felt horrible.

"I didn't mean it" Killua said, "I'm sorry Freecs. I guess they just upset me" he said looking down at his own drink.

"The girls? Why?" Gon asked looking confused.

"I don't know, I guess I just wanted it to be us" he said still not looking at his friend. He knew Gon would think he meant the four of them, even though he just meant the two of them, but at least it was the truth. He felt Gon relax.

"Don't be dumb, you know I'll always rather be with you" he said looking back at Killua smiling. Killua couldn't help but smile back at him. Suddenly the world was spinning way too much.

"I fell horrible" Killua said.

"Don't, you already said you were sorry" Gon said grabbing Killua's hand.

"No, I mean I feel sick. I think I'm going to throw up. I actually wasn't lying about the pool" Killua said suddenly wanting to be very far away from the bar. Gon let out a laugh.

"Come on I'll take you back upstairs" Gon said putting one of Killua's arms around his shoulders to steady his friend. Gon walked Killua back to their room and helped him until he lay on the bed. He tucked him in and turned his back. Before he could get too far Killua grabbed his arm.

"Where are you going?" he asked.

"I'm going downstairs to let the guys know your fine. I'll come back in a minute" Gon explained.

"You're sleeping here right? In this bed?" Killua asked even though he felt himself blush while he did.

"Killu, didn't I already say I'd rather sleep with you?" Gon said with a laugh and walked out the door, leaving Killua with a smile on his face.

* * *

**Disclaimer: I do not own HunterxHunter.**

**Side Note: Hope you enjoy this one! It's the longest one yet. Please comment if you find any mistakes and again I apologize if you do! XD**


	4. Kurapica's Meddling

Chapter Three – Kurapica's Meddling

Kurapica and Killua sat on the shade by the side of the pool. Kurapica turned to look at poor Killua sip on a bottle of water with his sun glasses on. He couldn't help let out a laugh. Killua turned to glare at him.

"What?" Killua asked aggressively. Kurapica just shook his head and looked straight ahead. Leorio and Gon where at the other end of the pool talking happily. "Are you going to lecture me about drinking too?" Killua asked looking back at his water bottle and taking a sip.

"I think I heard Gon take care of that this morning" Kurapica said remembering waking up to hear Killua complain about his head and Gon refusing to help him with something that was his own fault. Since the two boys showed up in the hotel, Kurapica had noticed they had grown much more comfortable with each other than he remembered. Killua always seemed to be either looking at Gon or finding some way to be near to him. That was when he wasn't thinking about drinking. Gon on the other hand responded naturally to all the signs of affections his friend offered him.

Kurapica thought back to the conversation he and God shared the night before, while the other two slept.

* * *

They sat at the edge of the pool in their balcony and Kurapica could tell Gon looked worried about something.

"Sometimes I get the feeling he's growing bored of chasing pointless leads with me" Gon said looking down at his feet in the water. They had been discussing about the journey to Pandora when Gon bluntly declared this. Kurapica didn't even feel the need to ask who he was talking about.

"I don't think Killua is likely to ever grow bored of you Gon" Kurapica said smiling softly to his young friend. Gon smiled weakly and looked dissatisfied.

"Lately he goes from being nice to being mean to me in seconds. He's lying all the time, when I ask him what's wrong" Gon said and looked straight ahead, "Mito-san said it was a natural part of being a teenager, the mood swings" Gon said facing Kurapica. Kurapica agreed that it was a natural part of being a teenager, but he didn't think Mito-san quite managed to point out what these specific mood swings meant.

"What do you think Gon?" Kurapica asked not wanting to meddle too much in his friend's life. Gon stopped to think for a while.

"I think Killua is still my best friend but something about that has changed" he said tilting his head to the side. Kurapica knew he was trying his best to remain objective.

"How about you Gon?" Kurapica decided to ask. Gon looked back at him confused. "Has something changed towards Killua from you?" he asked clearing up his question. From the expression on Gon's face Kurapica knew that he had never stopped to think about it. He let out a little laugh. "Think about that Gon" he said and Gon looked back at his feet.

* * *

Kurapica looked at Gon laughing at something Leorio was telling him and pushing him into the pool. Kurapica saw from the corner of his eye that Killua was looking at Gon intently too.

"You guys sure have grown" Kurapica said casually stretching in his seat. Killua turned to look at him.

"What do you mean?" Killua asked him. Kurapica knew Killua wasn't as naïve as Gon. He was always searching for ulterior motive in anything Kurapica said about them. If he wanted to help he had to do it carefully.

"You're so tall!" Kurapica said with a laugh. He felt Killua relax for a second. He had to be careful not to mention their relationship. "Gon looks so grown up that all the girls here are looking at him" Kurapica said and knew he was not lying. He had seen at least three girls walk past Gon and smile at him with no response.

"He's so clueless though" Killua added and Kurapica nodded.

"It's easy to understand why a body like his would attract anybody's attention. I sometimes find myself just staring at him" He added lightly. No, that was a step in the wrong direction, he felt Killua tense again. Killua said nothing. "It must be distracting" Kurapica said looking at Killua.

"Just because you're a flaming homosexual doesn't mean everybody is" Killua said sharply. There was a long silence.

"Killua" Kurapica said with his hurt escaping through his voice. Killua took off his sun glasses. Kurapica saw the hurt run through his face too.

"I didn't mean that at all" Killua said looking at Kurapica and getting up, "I'm so sorry" he said to him. Kurapica could see he really meant it. His hurt slowly retreated as he saw before him a hurt and confused cub lashing out at everything and everyone in his way.

"It's okay" Kurapica said smiling sweetly at his friend. They looked at each other, "If it helps at all I am a, what was it you so kindly called it, a flaming homosexual?" Kurapica said to Killua with a little laugh. He felt Killua relax and sit back down next to him.

"That's no excuse, I'm sorry" He said again not looking at him. Kurapica knew he might be able to use this to his advantage.

"It wasn't easy to accept but I think when you find yourself in love with a guy it's pretty hard to deny" Kurapica said looking back at Gon and Leorio, "Sometimes, when all the problems around you blur out what you're feeling, the person just finds his way to creep in your mind and give you some comfort" Kurapica added looking back at Killua. Killua was looking back at Gon. He got up again.

"I'm not feeling very well, I'm going to take a nap" Killu said turning around.

"Killua" Kurapica said but Killua just raised his hand.

"Tell Gon I'm fine" Killua said and walked away. Had Kurapica been wrong meddling in? He felt he might have confused Killua more than cleared any doubts in his head. Surly enough Gon was at his side in a second looking at Killua in the distance.

"Where's" he started but Kurapica interrupted.

"He's just feeling hung over Gon. He went for a nap" Kurapica said before Gon could worry further. Gon looked at him and relaxed a bit. Kurapica just wanted Gon to be happy. If he didn't feel the way he did for him or held him in such high regard he would have never meddled but he felt he needed to lend some help if Gon was ever going to walk in the right direction with Killua. He was worried that Killua was just going to give up and leave one day and he didn't want to see Gon hurt that way. What was it with this boy that just made him want to protect him despite his better judgment?

"Right" Gon said sitting in Killua's former spot. He saw Gon look at Leorio who was now talking again to the same girls they had met the night before, only this time they had brought their friends too. "Leorio's happy" Gon said brightly.

"Well it is his celebration. He still has a lot of work ahead of him if he wants to make his dreams come true" Kurapica said and Gon nodded.

"You're right" Gon said and called one of the waiters "Can I have a drink?" he asked the man and Kurapica looked at him surprised. The waiter looked at Gon puzzled too for his ambiguous question.

"He'll have one of these" Kurapica said lifting his own drink to show it to the waiter. He nodded and disappeared. Gon smiled at him.

"I might as well celebrate too if I want to make my dreams come true!" he said innocently back to Kurapica.

"Yes you do Gon" Kurapica said back to his friend and returned his smile.

* * *

**Disclaimer: I do not own HunterxHunter.**

**Side Note: I'm growing increasingly more inspired with the story thanks to my reviews! Please keep up reading I promise I have much more planned for these characters! **

**I've found some mistakes rereading the last chapters. I'll have those corrected in a bit!**


	5. Celebration

**Side Note: Okay guys, here's where things start getting heavy. I feel obliged to warn you that there will be some what explicit Yaoi content in this Chapter. Even though I'm not much of a fan of leaving nothing to the imagination I still feel it is my duty to warn when a some what more mature content comes up. I'll also assume that once you read this chapter if you keep reading you are fully aware that things will keep going in a similar direction; which is to say if you do not like yaoi stop reading now. With that said I hope you enjoy reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it. XD**

**Disclaimer: I do not own HunterxHunter. **

* * *

Chapter Four – Celebration

Killua woke up slowly from him slumber. He felt better already; maybe all he needed was good nap to get over that horrible hang over. It had taken him a while to fall asleep, trying to recover from what Kurapica had just told him. He looked out the window and saw it must be nearing night fall. Suddenly he became aware of the music sounding outside his room and the cheerful voices on the other side. He could hear his friend's voices and then more people. Girls. He got up from the bed in a second.

Killua practically ran out the door and saw a bunch of people he didn't know out in the pool in the balcony.

"KILLUAAAAA!" he heard Gon scream from behind him. He looked back and saw Gon walking towards him with his arms open. He also noticed the girl he was talking too before he saw Killua. He felt Gon's arms go around him and hold him tight. For a second all the rage that had surfaced at the sound of the girls voices disappeared. Gon pulled away and smiled at Killua. Killua saw Gon's smiling face and his flaming red cheeks?

"Killu I'm drunk!" Gon declared putting his arm around Killua's shoulder and walking out in the balcony completely forgetting about the girl he was talking to a second ago. Killua could not believe what he was seeing. Gon had tried to drink with Killua once but had passed out completely five minutes after they had started. "Guy's look who's up!" Gon said walking out by the pool. Leorio and Kurapica turned to look at Killua; they too had red cheeks.

"Killua!" they both cheered in unison.

"Come and join the fun" Leorio said waving at him to get in from underneath two girls. Even Kurapica looked like he was having fun chatting with them. Where had all these girls come from?

"Yes Killu! Join!" Gon said and Killua felt the slight push that shoved him into the pool. Killua couldn't even react; he just felt the water and then the laugher when he surfaced out to look back at Gon horrified.

"Gon! I'm still wearing clothes!" Killua said looking at himself. Gon climbed into the pool next to him.

"Only the shirt. Those are your swimming trunks!" Gon said grabbing Killua's shirt and pulling it off him. Killua felt his face grow red at Gon undressing him right in front of everyone.

"Gon!" he said again but the turned to feel Leorio putting a bottle in his hand.

"You have to catch up!" Leorio said and pushed the bottle into Killua's mouth and tilted it so that his friend could drink. Killua pushed the bottle after taking a big gulp. He paused and then let out a laugh.

"Fine!" he said and drank again. He felt Gon pull him from behind and sat him next to him in the pool. Gon put an arm around Killua's shoulder. Killua looked sideways at his drunken friend and smiled.

"I can't believe you're drunk" Killua said to him.

"It was Kurapica's fault!" Gon said pointing at Kurapica accusingly.

"No it wasn't! I was surprised when I was drunk too, those drinks were way stronger than they tasted" Kurapica said defensively but still laughing.

"Killu you sleep too much!" Gon said pulling Killua closer, "I missed you" Gon said in a low voice so only Killua heard. He felt himself blush. Killua drank in this affection Gon was giving him and eased into the whole celebration. The girls bothered Killua less and less as Gon never left his side; he was actually starting to enjoy their company. Killua found himself at one moment talking alone to Kurapica about the trip; though a drunken Kurapica made for a sloppy conversation.

"I think you should just wing it you know. Just go for it" Kurapica declared insightfully. "You and Gon always seem to have these sense to know what to do best when you're in the middle of the fight" He said. Killua agreed they were always at their best when all their senses were overactive in face of danger.

"I think that people have been so cryptic with the whole island to the point of not giving us another option really" Killua said thinking about the whole thing, "If you think about it, the trail must be ever changing so that no one could pass back information" Killua said confessing his thoughts on the matter.

"Maybe it's in your head" Kurapica said and Killua let out a laugh. "No, no think about it. What if the scenery was especially designed to screw with your head" Kurapica said looking at him alarmed.

"If that's true going in a group might make it easier" Killua said his head going back to Netero's warning about the phantom troupe. Just then Gon splashed into the pool with one of the girls.

"What are you talking about?" Gon asked sitting on Killua's lap. Killua felt his face burn bright red. "Open your legs" Gon said looking back at Killua.

"W-what?" Killu asked feeling his face might be able to signal an air ship from a distance.

"So I can sit" Gon said. Not waiting for Killua to move, Gon pulled his legs apart so that he could sit where the space cleared out, now having Killua's legs on his sides. The girl who came in with Gon giggled.

"Gon you look so comfy. You should share" She said to him. Gon leaned back so his back rested in Killua's chest.

"Nope! Killua's mine" Gon stated simply. He leaned his head back to rest it on Killua's shoulder. Gon took a sip of his drink and moved his head from side to side to the rhythm of the music that played in the back ground. Killua couldn't react. He heard Kurapica and the girl laugh and say something else but his head couldn't warp itself around what Gon had just said. Killua felt his heart thumping so loud he was sure Gon was able to feel it on his back. He felt completely sobered up.

"Leorio is happy!" Gon said looking at his friend. Surely enough, Leorio was cornering one of the girls to the edge of the pool and kissing her. Somehow seeing them kiss made Killua even more uncomfortable.

"And off they go" Kurapica added cheerfully as Leorio grabbed the girl's hand and walked out of the pool towards his room.

"Where are they going?" Gon asked innocently.

"Don't worry Gon, you completed your objective" Kurapica said smiling to his friend and Gon smiled back.

"What?" Killua asked curiously. Gon turned his head towards Killua's face. He felt Gon's breathing on his neck.

"Kurapica told me Leorio wanted to celebrate because he had so much more work ahead of him still, so I rounded up all these girls so that Leorio would be even happier. They all made me drink, that's why I'm drunk" Gon said to Killua. Killua felt the vibrations of Gon's words on his neck.

"To make Leorio happy" Killua finished for Gon. Gon nodded happily.

"That and because it got me thinking" Gon said and moved from Killua and stood in front of him. Killua felt a pang of pain in his heart from the distance. "We haven't celebrated either, or Kurapica. So this is our celebration! For all of us!" Gon said opening his arms. His cheeks were red from drinking and his smile shone to all off them. Killua looked at Kurapica as raised his glass towards Killua.

"For the Hunter's License" Kurapica said.

"For Greed Island" Gon said raising his glass.

"For defeating Chimera ants" Killua said they all joined their glasses and then drank.

"Oh and for Leorio's graduation!" Gon added as an afterthought. Kurapica and Killua laughed.

* * *

"I'm not sleepy!" Gon protested as Killua forced him to go to bed. Gon dancing in the middle of a hoard of girls in bikinis was as much as he could take. Plus Kurapica had gone to bed and he didn't feel much like entertaining the girls much longer.

"Just go into the bathroom and change. I'm sure when you're in your pajamas you'll feel differently" Killua said pushing Gon into the bathroom and closing the door. He looked for his own pajamas around the room. He heard Gon singing along to one of the songs he had been dancing to and smiled to himself. Why did he have to find him so damn cute? He looked for his sweatpants and changed into them. He was still looking for his shirt when Gon walked out of the bathroom and made him forget all about it. He walked just wearing his underpants and got in the bed.

"Okay. You're right. I'm sleepy now" Gon said pulling the covers over him and closing his eyes.

"And the rest of your pajama?" Killua asked hopefully.

"Hmm?" Gon asked back sleepy and Killua knew he was going to get into that bed with an almost naked Gon._ Fine, _he told himself, _I can deal with that. I'll just stay in the far end of the bed. _He looked for his shirt and put it on and turned off the lights. He walked all the way around the bed and got inside far from Gon. He turned his body away from his friend and closed his eyes. _Yeah, he could do this._

He started to drift of to sleep when he felt Gon moving closer to him, suddenly he was completely alert again. Gon put his arm around Killua's waist and rested his forehead on Killua's back. Killua's heart was starting to pick up speed. _It's okay, you were prepared for this. He always wants to get closer. _A few minutes passed and Killua could hear Gon's breathing steady and his heart beat was slow and rhythmic. He was asleep, finally. Killua closed his eyes and steadied his own heart beat and fell slowly asleep.

Killua didn't know how much time had happened when he felt Gon pull Killua closer to him. His back was pressed against Gon's chest. What was Gon doing? Was he still asleep? Killua stopped and listened to Gon's breathing. Yes! He was still asleep. _Good Killua just relax._ He tried to close his eyes again when he felt Gon's hand go under his shirt and stroke him all the way up to his chest. He felt Gon's thumb gently stroke his skin. Gon moved his face so that his chin rested between Killua's shoulder and his neck. _Okay, he can't be doing this completely asleep! _Killua thought angrily; But Gon's heart beat and breathing didn't suggest he was in fact awake.

"Gon" Killua ventured to whisper. Nothing; he didn't even stop stroking his thumb against Killua's chest. Killua was trying to think when Gon raised one of his legs slightly closer to him and pulled him even closer so that his hips were pressed against Killua's back side. Killua felt himself blush and his heart beat faster and faster. He couldn't move a muscle; he stayed perfectly still waiting for Gon to move away or wake up or something. Apart from the obvious discomfort, Gon's lack of clothing left very little to the imagination for Killua.

Killua sighed as the minutes passed and he suddenly became much more aware of Gon's breathing so close to him and his body pressed against him completely. He felt his body starting to react to all his closeness. _No! No, this can't be happening right now! _Killua thought trying to will his body to stop reacting. _This is why teenage boys don't sleep together Gon! _He thought furiously, _this is why! _He was so mad at himself for reacting this way he didn't control it when he shifted slightly. He heard a soft moan against his neck. Did Gon just…moan? Killua felt he was about to pass out. No, Gon was probably just mumbling in his sleep, yeah, that had to be it. There was no way Gon could have just moaned-

Killua felt something move against his lower back. Everything around him seemed to grow more still and his heartbeat was the only sound for miles. Gon's body was reacting to him too. It made no sense; Killua was completely sure that Gon was sleeping. So what was it? Could Gon be dreaming about something that got him "excited"?

Tentatively Killua decided to move slightly again. Gon moaned again! This time Killua was completely sure it had been a moan! Gon rubbed his face against Killua's neck and hugged him tighter. A slight grin spread through Killua's face. What was Gon dreaming of? Killua was completely sure Gon would have no memory of this the next day and suddenly felt an overwhelming need to take advantage of his friend. _No! _A voice inside Killua's head said firmly. He couldn't take advantage of Gon, even if he was basically asking for it. It just wouldn't feel right.

Just as he was thinking that Gon buried his face in Killua's neck and moved his hand from his chest to Killua's hip; this time it was Gon who moved against him. Why did Gon have to be such a heavy sleeper! Now that he thought about it, this wasn't one bit fair for Killua! Just having to stay still and ignore him. He slowly moved his hand and reached out to the back of Gon's head. Gon moved even deeper in his neck and the rest of his body followed. Killua smiled to himself. The next time Gon moved against him he pushed himself harder on Gon's body and ran his fingers in his hair. Gon moaned a little louder this time; Killua couldn't hide the satisfaction in his face. Feeling Gon reacting to him, even if he was sound asleep, was amazing. He never dreamed of anything close to this happening with his friend.

They moved slowly against each other until Killua, who had his eyes closed, suddenly opened them at the feel of Gon's hand moving from over his hip and making its way under Killua's sweatpants. Gon ran his hand through the bare flesh of Killua's leg. Killua could feel himself breathing harder. He felt Gon's breathing get heavier too and he felt his neck moist from him breathing so close to his skin. Gon moved again and sank his fingertips in Killua's leg, dragging his hand upward. Killua was willing with every cell in his body for Gon to move his hand just slightly to the right…

Gon moved again and again until Killua felt a shiver go all over his friend's body as he held his breath for a few seconds. As Gon breathed out, the realization of what had just happened washed over Killua. Gon had just finished against him and if that wasn't enough he moaned one last time. Only this time he moaned his name; Killua's name. Killua felt his heart was going to explode out of his chest. _Had Gon been dreaming about me that whole time?_

Gon's breathing steadied more and more as the time went by and Killua decided to pull Gon's hand from inside his sweatpants and wrapped it around his waist. Gon's skin felt warm and moist to Killua's touch. He couldn't stop smiling no matter how much he tried. He couldn't believe what had just happened. He felt a cold wet sensation on his back and felt himself blush once more. Killua felt there might still be some hope for him if only Gon had actually been dreaming about him.

* * *

**For my reviewers:**

**Thank you again for your words of encouragement, they really make my day! I hope you keep on reading and stay around for more. Since I have A LOT of free time in my hands this week I will try to upload a chapter a day, but I'm sorry to say that I don't know if I'll be able to keep that rhythm up once my life turns back to chaos. Meanwhile lets both enjoy this fast pace :)**


	6. Gon Freaks

Chapter Five – Gon Freaks

"Fuck" a soft curse slipped from Gon's lips. He had woken up because of an ever growing headache and now sat on the edge of the bed looking down at himself. Why were his pants all wet? He couldn't even remember going to bed, or going to sleep in his underpants. He found himself much closer than he usually dared to get to Killua. Thinking about that he suddenly turned to look at Killua's back. "Fuck" he heard himself say again, panic now beginning to rise in his mind. Did he pee? It didn't smell like it. What the hell happened? Gon felt Killua slightly stir in the bed and he got up and ran to the bathroom.

Gon took his clothes off and got into the shower. He noticed that more than wet he was sticky, which just made him feel a million times more panicked. He showered and changed quickly and ran out of the room before Killua got up. He needed to talk to someone and fast and he could only think of one person he might not be as embarrassed to talk about this particular problem. He knocked in Leorio's door.

Gon waited for an answer but got nothing. He knocked again.

"I'm busy!" Leorio called from the other side of the door.

"Leorio I really have to talk to you, please open the door!" Gon called out and tried to keep his voice down.

"Gon?" Leorio asked and Gon heard him move towards the door. "What is it? Does it have to be right now?" he asked looking behind Gon.

"Leorio please this is an absolute emergency, let me in!" Gon begged him. Leorio opened his eyes.

"In?" he asked and looked at Gon's alarmed expression. "Fine, just give me a second" Leorio said and he shut the door when he opened it again one of the girls from last night walked out of the room.

"Hi" Gon said blushing a little; she just waved and left the hotel room. He looked back at Leorio mortified "I didn't know you had someone in there!" Gon said looking upset with Leorio but not raising his voice from a whisper.

"I said I was busy! What did you think I meant?" He hissed back at Gon, mimicking his low voice. "Why are we whispering?" He asked Gon. Gon just pushed Leorio back into his room and closed the door behind them.

"Okay Gon what is it?" Leorio asked sitting on his bed. Gon paced around him thinking. How was he supposed to even talk about this? He didn't even know what had happened.

"Okay. I woke up this morning and my pants" Gon started but he felt his face grow redder and redder by the second.

"What?" Leorio asked when Gon failed to continue.

"My underwear" He corrected himself, "was wet" he added with a low voice. Leorio looked at Gon blushing.

"So you peed?" Leorio asked reaching the most obvious conclusion not getting Gon's utter embarrassment.

"That's what I thought! But it didn't smell like it" Gon said and looked at Leorio hopefully. Leorio suddenly realized that this conversation was going to take an unpleasant turn. "It kinda smelled like…" Gon trailed off and sniffed, "Like this room!" Gon said looking at Leorio surprised. Gon watched his friend as he turned red. Gon pointed at him. "Why are you blushing?" Gon asked still pointing at him. He knew it was something he should have been embarrassed about!

"I'm not!" he said defensively and re arranged his glasses in his face, "Gon what happened to you wasn't anything out of the ordinary for a boy like you" he said to him wondering how on earth he was going to continue this conversation. Why did he have to explain to Gon what was happening to him? He suddenly felt a lot of rage toward Ging Freecs. Gon moved to sit next to Leorio in the bed.

"What happened to me?" Gon wanted to know.

"Well, sometimes, when a boy your age sleeps, he has dreams and sometimes those dreams can cause your body to react, causing your problem" Leorio said. Gon listened to him intently.

"The wetness? That makes no sense" Gon said going over what he just heard and not getting it. Why would a dream cause that? Why hadn't it happened before? What kind of dream did he have last night?

"Gon, you're seventeen by now you must at least know what it feels like when your body is turned on" Leorio said looking at him even more blushed than before.

"Turned on? When am I turned off?" Gon asked even more confused. Leorio slapped his forehead with his hand. He tried to figure out a way to say this in a more sensible way.

"Growing up, what changes have you seen? In your body" Leorio asked him. Gon thought about it.

"I'm taller, my muscles are bigger and I have hair all over" Gon said thinking about all of the changes and then suddenly one which he could not bring himself to say, suddenly a feeling of understanding flushed through him, "Oh…" Gon let out quietly. Gon remembered feeling hotter at times, usually concentrated in his lower region. He got this urge like he want to be close to someone; touch them. Usually Killua was the only one around…

"Killua!" Gon remembered suddenly, "I was hugging Killua when I woke up! When I noticed I was wet I looked back at him and he had a wet patch in his back" Gon looked at Leorio. Leorio just sat there with his mouth hanging open. "Was that me?" Gon asked looking worried. Leorio just nodded.

"I'm sure he won't notice" Leorio said looking down knowing he was probably wrong about that.

"What if he does? Killua knows way more about these things that me! He's going to think I'm a pervert!" Gon said even more worried. Gon finally got it. It was a sexual thing. He felt his whole face growing red. He tried desperately to remember what he was dreaming about but his whole night was a blur. He remembered being down by the pool with Kurapica and how that first drink he had made him feel more cheerful and loud. He remembered talking to girls and introducing them to Leorio. He remembered telling all of them about their hotel room and all the girls asking if they could come up and see it. He kinda remembered all the drinks he had throughout all that time.

What happened next? They were upstairs, Miko, one of the girls, has asked him to show him around the suite and he did. He showed it to her and Killua woke up. Yes! He remembered Killua being there and he was happy to see him so he hugged him. Then he had more confusing flashes; some of the girls cornering him asking him about Killua and if he was single or interested. He definitively remembered getting upset at all the questions. Then he left to find his friend and he sat really close to him. Gon felt a blush creep up his cheeks; he wanted to show the girls that Killua was his. He'd felt so warm being so close to Killua.

Then more confusing flashes; he couldn't tell if what he was remembering was real or not. Maybe Killua took him back to the room? But he had this image of himself swimming in the pool and then Gon was hugging someone, feeling himself growing hot. He remembered Killua's smell but nothing in his mind made any sense. He grabbed his head in his hands and tried to force his head into remembering, but all he was getting was a worse headache. He looked up at Leorio and his friend saw the confusion and the frustration in Gon's face.

"What did I do?" he asked Leorio, hopping he would answer all his questions.

"I think you might have a better chance in asking Killua" Leorio suggested but saw Gon shake his head frantically.

"No" he said without hesitating. Somehow the idea of asking his best friend why they were both wet sounded like that last thing Gon would ever want to do. "Was Killua drunk?" Gon asked hopefully; maybe Killua had no memory of the night either. Though he would still be able to tell his back was wet; but if Gon wasn't next to him there was no way he could connect it to him…

"Maybe, I didn't really talk to him much last night" Leorio confessed. Gon stood up from the bed.

"I have to go" He said walking towards the door. He wanted to get out before Killua got up. He didn't want to face anything until he knew what was going on. Without waiting for Leorio to comment further on the matter, Gon just ran out of his room and then the suite. He ran until he reached the elevator and went down to the lobby. What was he supposed to do now? He walked out of the elevator and went on without really thinking about where he was headed.

"Gon!" He heard someone call out his name. He turned and saw Miko; one of the girls from last night. He smiled shyly at her.

"Hi Miko-san" he said. She waved away the formality.

"Miko-chan!" she corrected cheerfully, "Gon are you okay?" she asked with a look of concern. Gon realized his face must be showing what he was feeling and smiled at her.

"Yeah! I just have a bit of a headache" he lied to her. Miko just smiled at him and grabbed his hand and pulled him out of the hotel.

"I have just the thing for that" she said sunnily.

* * *

A while later Gon found himself having breakfast with Miko on a little restaurant a few blocks away from the hotel. She told him that there was no cure for a hangover like a greasy breakfast and boy, was she right. The more Gon ate the better his head and whole body seemed to feel.

"So, what's with the long face?" Miko asked wondering why Gon's face wasn't as cheery as she remembered it.

"It's nothing" Gon mumbled running his fork through the plate.

"Is it the Killua thing?" Miko asked and Gon looked up at her surprised. She let out a little laugh.

"How do you know about that?" Gon just asked without thinking.

"Well Killua seemed a bit upset when we were all dancing. The way he shooed us out of the apartment made us think you probably had a fight after we left" She said and Gon's face turned into more confusion.

"I don't know. I can't really remember much of last night, to be honest" Gon said looking back down at his plate.

"Well nothing happened really. All the girls were dancing with you after Kurapica left and Killua was just sitting on the corner looking like he wanted us to leave" she said with a little laugh.

"He was mad?" Gon asked trying to put the pieces of last night back together.

"No! I don't think he was really mad. I think he was more jealous than mad" Miko said looking up wondering about what she just said.

"Jealous?" Gon asked. What exactly was Killua jealous of?

"Well yeah, because you were sitting talking to him and then you came over to us" she said and Gon suddenly had this image of himself sitting in front of Killua leaning his back against his friends chest. When Kurapica left, Killua moved his arm around Gon's waist; that's when Gon got up.

"Miko-san" Gon started as suddenly so many pieces in his head started to connect. His conversation with Kurapica, Killua's behavior, the "wet" dream and what Miko-san had just said, "How do you know when you're attracted to someone?" Gon asked looking at Miko. Miko-san was utterly surprised at Gon's question; her face turning pink. "Sexually" Gon added and Miko-san's face turned all the way from pink to red.

"W-well Gon that's a complicated question" she said not looking in Gon's direction. Gon looked down sadly. Miko just couldn't see Gon feeling so bad about whatever was going inside his head. "I guess" Miko said and Gon looked back up at her hopefully, "I guess you want to be around them all the time, and you think about them a lot and want to, you know, err… touch…them?" she said feeling her face really hot and still not daring to look at Gon's face.

"Touch them?" Gon asked thinking about Killua's hand around his waist.

"Yeah, like you always find some way to be closer to them; physically" she explained. Gon's mind was racing. Yes, this made all the sense in the world! Kurapica was right; something had changed between Killua and him. Gon thought about the way Killua hugged him leaned his forehead on Gon's head. The way Killua would sometimes cuddled him when they slept together. Most of the times when Killua drank he was more affectionate with him; even if they were standing next to each other, Killua would just rest his elbow on Gon's shoulder. Gon reviewed it all again in his head; they slept together, their closeness in the pool and now this dream. Gon had felt so warm when Killua's hand moved around his waist. He could almost hear Leorio as he asked him if he knew how it felt when his body was turned on. _Yes, Leorio, I do now. _Gon's mind cleared up as the only explanation for all of this popped into his mind; Gon was attracted to Killua, sexually. A blush came over the tanned boy's face.

"Miko-san, thank you!" Gon said looking at her. Miko just smiled back at Gon.

* * *

**Disclaimer : I do not own HunterxHunter (though I wish I did so I could actually make an anime out of this)**

**Side Note: Gon Freaks (see what I did there? Ha! ... sorry, I'm guessing I should get some sleep) as we all knew he would. To anybody interested I do plan on expanding more on Pandora so I ask for your patience on more let's say "realistic" hunterxhunter topics, for they are well on their way! As always I hope you had fun reading and stay tuned for more! (how about that sleep? Am I right?)**

**To my lovely reviewers: Thank you so much for your kind words! Having feedback has really made this experience much more fun and is keeping me very motivated to hit that Complete tab someday soon. (My native tongue is Spanish, btw) **

**To people who haven't reviewed but are still reading: I hope you're having fun too and hey! I would love to hear your thoughts! XD**


	7. Reacting

Chapter Six - Reacting

Killua woke up feeling better than he had in days; weeks even! Even when he woke up without Gon at his side, he still hummed happily as he walked into the shower. He noticed Gon's clothes in a pile in the corner of the bathroom and smiled. He took off his own clothes and got into the shower; that had to be the first sober shower he'd taken in weeks! It felt like the best one too. He changed still thinking about last night; hearing Gon moan in his ear. "_He said my name!_" was all Killua could truly think about. He tried to relive the moment in his head but he felt his cheeks burning and his body awakening. He shook the thought out of his head and though he would revisit it later at night when he was safe from showing his feelings to everyone.

He felt nervous and slightly embarrassed about seeing Gon but he knew that his friend probably had no memory of last night and would act as casual as ever. Killua walked out of the room and found Leorio and Kurapica sitting on the dining room table having breakfast.

"Morning everyone!" Killua said brightly and sat on the table with them. Kurapica looked up and smiled halfheartedly as he tried to keep his breakfast down. Leorio looked at Killua with a slight blush on his face but he did nothing more than mumble good morning back. Killua looked at the food in front of him and decided he was starving. He took a little bit of everything on his plate and started to devour it as he hummed happily.

"Shouldn't you be hung over too?" Kurapica asked looking at Killua's smiling face.

"I paid my dues yesterday, plus I didn't drink much" Killua said shrugging at Kurapica, his smile never leaving his face.

"You were sober? Last night?" Leorio asked. Killua nodded back and saw Leorio frown at him in confusion.

"Yeah I couldn't drink too much with the hang over I had in the morning so I just enjoyed seeing all of you drunk!" Killua said happily as he chewed his food.

"You're way to cheerful today" Kurapica said looking back at his food and turning slightly green. Killua laughed and just kept on chewing happily.

From across the table Leorio looked at him suspiciously. _Why is Killua in such a good mood?_ Leorio thought to himself. He had dismissed Gon's problem as a wet dream but now seeing Killua in this good mood and then Gon telling him about the wet patch on Killua's back…

If Killua was telling the truth, which Leorio didn't doubt, and he was in fact sober when he went to bed..._No, _Leorio though, it was just his perverted mind playing tricks on him. Still, he thought that the way Killua acted towards Gon was much more affectionate than he remembered. The fact that they still slept together in spite of their age…and yesterday they were celebrating and drinking with girls that were all over them. If it'd been him at their age, Leorio would have taken all of those girls in to one room and locked the door for the entire weekend. Still Killua just threw the girls out and instead went to bed with Gon.

Leorio watched Killua chew his food and tease Kurapica about his hang over. He heard him laugh and thought he really wasn't the little boy he remembered. He knew Killua was no saint from the moment he met him, and after knowing about his family and his past, Leorio knew Killua and Gon weren't really the same age. Not mentally. Now seeing Killua at seventeen made him wonder more about him and this closeness he had with Gon. Gon was unbelievably naïve and trusting; anybody who wanted to could take advantage of a person like him. Especially if it was someone that he trusted as much as he trusted Killua. Leorio shook his head. He needed to stop thinking like that; Gon and Killua were best friends. There was no way Killua would betray that.

* * *

Gon stood some time later outside of the hotel suite's door. He had been running the same thoughts in his head for hours and now all he could feel was shame. He knew Killua was on the other side of that door and that just made it all the more difficult to open it. He didn't want to see Killua, he felt that if he saw him his face would go bright red and he would just enter in a state of panic. What was he supposed to say now? How was he going to act? He couldn't just go on about life like he had all this time. Now he knew how he felt about Killua and he just felt awful. To think that all this time Killua had been there for him, treating him like a friend and he, Gon, had been taking advantage of him.

Forcing Killua to share the same bed with him, hugging him all the time, demanding his attention; Gon had been so selfish to believe that they both wanted the same things because he knew Killua thought of him as his best friend. But now, everything had changed; Gon had been forcing himself on Killua all this time just to fulfill his own shameful purpose instead of being his friend. Of course Killua was acting distant and mean to him! He didn't want their relationship to go in the direction that Gon was leading it to!

No, Gon had to make amends for his lack of judgment and turn their relationship back to where it was supposed to be. He wanted Killua to stay with him, so he would do everything in his power to stop making him uncomfortable. With this new resolution in mind, Gon took a deep breath in and pushed the door open. Sure enough he saw Killua standing in the middle of the room in front of him. He took a deep breath and walked inside.

"Hey! I was waiting for you. Leorio and Kurapica are waiting for us in the hotel's dining room" Killua said happily. Gon felt his heart going a million miles per hour. He had to control himself; he had to stop acting like an overly affective creep.

"Right" he said and turned to walk outside again.

"Gon, wait up!" Killua said following him outside. They started to walk towards the elevator. Gon could see Killua from the corner of his eye; he had his hands in his pockets and he looked like he was trying to catch his eye. Gon tried as best he could to control the blood flow of his body from concentrating on his cheeks. Now that he finally understood what his feelings for Killua were, it was harder to focus on looking straight ahead. They got on the elevator and Gon felt a horrible tug in his stomach as he felt the small distance between the two of them in that enclosed space.

"Gon" Killua said and he felt forced to look at Killua. He looked back at Gon with his cheeks slightly rosy. Gon noticed he had a tank top on; he could see Killua's pale and silky skin shining against the blackness of the shirt. He felt the warmness growing in his midriff. He looked back in front of him.

"Hmm?" Gon responded trying to seem detached.

"Is everything okay?" Killua asked with a small voice.

"Mhm" Gon responded now looking up at the digital screen that showed them they still had a few more floors to go.

"Where-" Killua started to ask but Gon interrupted.

"I went out for breakfast with Miko-chan. We just talked and walked around for a while after that" Gon said not taking his eyes from the screen. Finally the door opened.

"Oh" he heard Killua say behind him. He walked out and started to walk stiffly towards the dining room. "Miko is the one-" Killua began but Gon interrupted again.

"Miko-chan is the pretty red head" Gon said reaching the dining room and spotting Leorio and Kurapica. Killua said nothing to Gon's last reply so they just walked in stiff silence towards their friends. Gon felt horrible being so cold to Killua but he felt like he had to fight back all impulses of being too nice with him. Regardless, he couldn't even look at Killua much less smile at him.

"Gon! Please tell me you're feeling as bad as me!" Kurapica said to Gon as he was sitting down and he froze. What was Kurapica talking about? Did Leorio say something to him? No, that made no sense.

"What?" Gon asked nervously as he sat. He saw Killua sit next to him from the corner of his eye.

"This hang over! You drank the same things I did and Leorio says he's fine" Kurapica said looking at Leorio resentfully. Gon let out a nervous laugh. Of course, the hang over.

"No I'm not doing so bad. I had a big breakfast; that made me feel much better. I was feeling really sick when I woke up" Gon said scratching the back of his head. He suddenly had a flash of Killua running his fingers through his hair. What was that? A memory? Or maybe it was the dream he had. Whatever it was it made his stomach turn into knots.

"We're did you go?" Leorio asked.

"I met Miko-san for breakfast" Gon said looking at Leorio. Leorio let out a laugh.

"Miko-chan huh? She's pretty!" Leorio said winking at Gon. Gon let out another quick laugh. The waiter came towards them to receive their order. He was grateful Leorio ordered for all of them because he wasn't the least bit hungry. What had that been? He ran his fingers through his hair again but he felt nothing.

"So tomorrow we're leaving" Leorio said looking at Gon and Killua. "You guys are all set to leave?" He asked them. Gon looked blankly back at him.

"Yeah we have to get on a bus the day after tomorrow. They told us they'd take us to the port so we could get a boat and sail off" Killua said when Gon failed to answer anything.

"You have to go on your own?" Kurapica asked curiously.

"Yeah, no boat or crew is willing to sail towards the Island. We have to rent out our boat and make our way there. Netero gave us a sea chart; according to that we should be getting there in two week, but most of the people we've talked to told us the weather is pretty unpredictable.

"It might take you longer?" Leorio asked. Gon saw Killua nod out the corner of his eye.

"We already arranged supplies for a month on the boat. We don't think it'll take us longer than that. In any case, Gon can catch us some food" Killua said and Gon saw him looking at him from the corner of his eye.

"Mhm" was all Gon managed to say looking up at Leorio and Kurapica.

"What are you going to do about the boat?" Kurapica asked looking at Gon. Silence again. Why couldn't he say anything? He felt his mind was completely blank.

"We've been practicing on our transferring out nen to protect larger objects" Killua said.

"Netero-san helped" Gon finally managed to say.

"Shu?" Kurapica asked and both of the boys nodded back.

"Yeah, he told us to practice before we met him and then made us practice with the air ship" Killua explained further, "Something that large is hard to focus on for a long amount of time, but we can synchronize to protect it when it needs it the most" Killua said.

"You managed to cover the entire air ship?" Leorio asked impressed.

"Not for too long, but the boat won't be nearly as big" Gon said starting to snap out of his trance. He could talk about this without being to intimate. Leorio and Kurapica both nodded back at them. The waiter came back with their food and as their conversation continued on their own guesses about the island and the troubles they would face Gon relaxed more and more. Though he still couldn't manage to look at Killua and had barely said two words to him since they came down. He even let himself laugh a couple of times from something Leorio said.

Soon though their conversation took the turn Gon was dreading. Leorio started to talk about last night and was being teased by Killua about the girl that he'd taken into his room. The very girl Gon had seen when he went over to Leorio's in the morning.

"Yeah well what can I say? I guess she just couldn't resist my charm" Leorio said looking smug.

"More like she was too drunk to resist your harassment" Killua said laughing.

"Whatever it was it still worked" Leorio said defensively and then smiling at Killua.

"I loved the fact that there was that one persistent girl hitting on Kurapica though" Killua said and Leorio and Killua laughed when Kurapica let out a frustrated sigh.

"Not even all the alcohol in the world" Kurapica said shaking his head not being able to hide his smile.

"Gon was the winner of the night" Leorio said. Gon felt himself blush; he really didn't want to be brought into the conversation.

"No" he said softly lowering his eyes to his hands.

"Yeah, I gave him one drink and suddenly he had all the girls in the pool ready to go up!" Leorio said looking at Gon amazed.

"It was really amazing, you should have seen it Killua" Kurapica said nodding and looking at Gon. Even Kurapica was joining in on the conversation without a care in the world and he felt like he wanted to run and hide.

"I'm just glad I got to see Gon drunk" Killua said with a laugh. Gon felt him looking at him. Gon tried so hard not too blush but it wasn't working; he tried to look down to hide it a bit more.

"It wasn't a big deal" Gon said with the same soft voice. "_Talk about something else, anything else" _Gon begged inside his head.

"He was quite de stud" Leorio said, "He had all those girls wrapped around his little finger" he continued._ Please stop._

"Leorio was the happiest of them all" Kurapica said with a laugh. Gon felt his head was about to explode.

"Yeah I'm drunken Gon's number one fan" Leorio confessed. Gon felt Killua looking at him; why couldn't they talk about something else, anything else that didn't make him feel worse than he already did?

"Hear that Gon! For Leorio's sake" Gon saw Killua smiling at him from the corner of his eye, "We'll have to get you drunk more often" Killua said putting his hand on Gon's shoulders. Reacting as if Killua had passed his nen's electrical current with his touch, Gon jumped away from Killua's touch. He felt his heart going a million miles per hour.

"It was a onetime thing Killua! It's _never _going to happen again!" Gon practically screamed looking at Killua. They all felt silent; the whole restaurant turned to look at them. Gon saw Killua's smile slowly fade from his face.

"Gon" he heard Kurapica say softly. Gon looked back at Kurapica; he felt his face turn redder and redder. He needed to get out of there. He turned around and started to move away.

"Gon we were just joking" Leorio said to Gon. Leorio looked at Killua's face; he looked like Gon had just slapped him.

"I know. I have to go. I'm meeting Miko-san" he lied to them. Gon walked as quickly as he could out the restaurant.

Killua felt like someone had taken the air from around him. He felt sick, he didn't know what to do or what to grasp to. Gon remembered; he knew what had happened last night and he was disgusted. He couldn't even stand Killua's touch; Gon hated him. Killua could feel his lunch coming back up his throat. He got up from the table. He felt the world crumbling around him. _Just breath, _he told himself, _just breath._

"Killua" Kurapica said but Killua was already running out of the restaurant on the opposite direction Gon had left through.

Kurapica and Leorio looked at the place Killua had disappeared to, astonished at what had just happened.

"What the hell?" Kurapica heard himself say. He looked sideways at Leorio who had a surprising look on his face; anger. Was he the only one who didn't know what was going on? "Leorio what's going on?" he asked him. Leorio turned and looked back at him.

"I'm not sure, but" he said and stopped himself.

"But?" Kurapica asked urging his friend to explain.

"But it's probably Killua's fault" he said looking back where Killua had left too. He couldn't help feel protective of Gon. He knew Killua had reacted like something had really hurt him but he knew Killua was the most sensible of the two. If something had hurt Gon, it had to be Killua's fault. He'd gotten that feeling from his conversation with Gon this morning; Gon was just too upset for it to be his fault. He had no idea what had happened to him. He felt his anger rise. Kurapica looked at Leorio's reaction; what the hell was going on?

* * *

**Disclaimer : I do not own HunterxHunter.**

**Side Note: Sadness yes that was Gon's "logical" conclusion... I hope you enjoyed reading this! Again thank you so much for all your kind words and I've already update the corrections though I'm sure there will be some mistake or other along the way (aren't there always?) and for that I apologize. Keep on reading for I will most certainly keep on writing! **


	8. Choices

Chapter Seven – Choices

Killua was curled up in a ball in the far end corner of the balcony. How could he have been so stupid? How did he let himself believe that Gon might feel the same way? How could he have taken advantage of him? And now Gon remembered. Killua felt the bile creep up his throat. He shook his head; he couldn't keep throwing up. He had to pull himself together. He would apologize and Gon would be okay with it. Gon had always been good at forgiving him. He sat there without moving an inch for what seemed like hours.

"Killua" he heard Leorio call out his name. He didn't turn to look at him. He felt Leorio walk over and sit next to him. They stayed like that, in silence, for a little while. Killua heard Leorio take a deep breath in and he knew his friend was about to talk to him; maybe try and snap him out of his self-loathing. Killua wasn't a fan of people cheering him up but he felt he might need a little help right now.

"Gon came to my room this morning" Leorio started. Killua's heart had started to pound harder. Did Gon tell Leorio? "He was really upset" Leorio continued. _There it is, the bile creeping back up._ "Look Killua I know that your relationship with Gon isn't exactly simple. You guys have known each other for five years now and it's easy to give in to the comfort you give each other" Killua's head started to spin, where was Leorio going with this? "But I think you know more than Gon where those lines are drawn and you shouldn't be taking advantage of that; Gon trusted you" Leorio finished.

Killua felt his heart shattering; like it was made from glass and it was splintering inside his chest. He couldn't breathe; he swallowed hard and nodded slowly still not looking at Leorio. His friend looked like he wanted to say something more but then he got up and left Killua's side. He knew it; it had all been his fault. How was he ever going to face Gon again? He couldn't go with Gon on this trip; or would it be worse if he didn't? Killua felt the air thinning, making each breath painful. His eyes were burning. _What am I supposed to do?_

"Leorio where's Killua?" He heard Kurapica ask him but he didn't hear Leorio answer. Killua couldn't talk to him. Hearing it from Leorio was already hard enough, he couldn't stand hearing it from Kurapica too. He got up and walked towards his room. He looked down at his feet not daring to meet Kurapica's eyes.

Kurapica saw Killua run past him and could've sworn he saw tears in Killua's eyes. Kurapica felt the anger rising inside him. He walked after Leorio and walked into his room behind him.

"What the hell did you say to him?" Kurapica said slamming the door of Leorio's room behind him. Leorio looked up at Kurapica in surprise. Leorio had his own doubts about getting into the situation, but he felt like something was terribly off; he just couldn't leave without saying something to Killua.

"Look Kurapica I don't think it's really any of your business" Leorio said to his blonde friend, making up his mind; he had made the right choice.

"It's really none of your business either but that didn't stop you!" Kurapica said getting angrier by the second. Leorio looked stunned. Did Kurapica know about the whole thing? How could he not be worried about Gon?

"If you know what's going on then, how can you take his side?" Leorio asked slowly.

"I'm not taking anyone's side! I'm staying out of it" Kurapica said, _well kind of. _"This is between the two of them. If you had to butt in you should have been comforting Killua not making him feel worse" Kurapica said to him, guessing that was what had happened. Comforting Killua? It was more like Gon needed the comfort, Leorio though.

"Kurapica, Killua is not as innocent as you think" Leorio said to him starting to feel angry at his friend.

"No Leorio, _Gon_ isn't as innocent as you think he is" Kurapica said and stormed out of the room. Leorio looked at his open room even more shocked. What the hell was that supposed to mean?

* * *

Gon walked into the suite some time later. The sun was completely down and he could finally face going back to his room now that everyone was safely in bed. He'd been walking around trying to figure out what to do next, but he couldn't think of anything to solve his problem. He knew he'd been so rude with his friends but he didn't know how to apologize without explaining what had happened. He stood in front of the two doors he was dreading. One lead to his room with Killua and the other lead to the empty room. He wanted, with all his might, to just go into the first room and joke around will Killua and fall asleep on the same bed. Maybe even hug him as closely as he had been hugging him when he woke up.

He looked at the other door. He couldn't face Killua and act as if nothing happened; he took a deep breath and walked to the second door and pushed it open. He closed the door and leaned his back against it. He didn't want this. He didn't want to feel this way and have to be so far away from Killua. Why couldn't things go back to normal? If he had just not gotten drunk yesterday everything would be fine. Why did he have to screw everything up?

"Gon" he almost screamed at the sound of his name. He turned on the light and saw Kurapica sitting on the arm chair in the corner of the room.

"Kurapica! When? Why?" Gon asked feeling his heart beating fast. Kurapica sighed.

"Leorio and I are leaving early tomorrow and I didn't want to leave without talking to you. I want you to know Gon, that I wouldn't be doing this if I didn't care about you" Kurapica said softly. Gon walked over to Kurapica and sat in the bed in front of him.

"What is it?" Gon asked feeling a slight nervousness in his stomach.

"I know that I shouldn't be interfering with your life" Kurapica started but Gon interrupted him.

"You're not interfering; I care about what you have to say" Gon said smiling at Kurapica. His friend returned his smile.

"Well, you remember the other day when you were telling me about the problems you were having?" Kurapica asked and saw a slight confusion on Gon's face, "With Killua" he clarified and Gon looked away from him. Kurapica knew this wasn't going to be an easy conversation, but he couldn't stop thinking what he could do to help after he saw Killua so upset.

"Mhm" Gon answered still not looking at him.

"You were hurt that you didn't understand why Killua was acting differently towards you?" Kurapica asked and Gon nodded. He didn't need to remind him; Gon knew now why he'd been acting that way.

"I get it now" Gon said looking at his feet. Kurapica knew that would be his reply.

"That's the thing Gon, I don't think you do" Kurapica said honestly. This made Gon look up at him. "You need to stop talking to other people about your problems with Killua" Kurapica said speaking out his final decision. Gon looked back at him confused.

"But you helped me think, and Leorio and Miko" Gon said thinking about who he had trusted with his problems. Kurapica sighed, he knew Gon had said something to Leorio, but telling Miko was only going to confuse him further.

"But not Killua?" Kurapica asked him. Gon looked away again. He couldn't face Killua much less have a conversation with him. "You are having a problem with Killua and you should look at him to get the answers you want" Kurapica said.

"I can't" Gon said softly.

"Gon, you are taking the easy way out" Kurapica said sternly and saw how something awakened in Gon's eyes. He knew Gon never liked to take the easy way out on anything. "Taking that road would only lead to bigger problems in the long run. Right now Killua is just as hurt and confused as you were" he continued, now talking softly to his friend.

"I don't want to hurt Killua!" Gon said suddenly concerned. He hadn't stopped to think that Killua might be upset with him.

"Then you agree you owe it to him; to talk to him and sort things out?" Kurapica asked him. Gon nodded slowly.

"But Kurapica, I can't look at him" He said and felt a relief just saying that out loud. Kurapica felt he reached a point in the conversation were he couldn't intrude any longer.

"Killua is your best friend Gon. I'm sure you have your reasons to be scared but you have to consider if you are willing to lose him over that fear" Kurapica said. He knew he had helped as much as he could. "Get some sleep Gon and think about it" Kurapica said and got up from the chair. He reached the door and looked back at Gon sitting, looking at the same spot not moving an inch. _I hope they can work it out._

* * *

__**Disclaimer: I do not own HunterxHunter (blah blah blah)**

**Side note: So these chapters have been stressful! I hope you are intrigued as to what is coming up next because it's coming up soon! To my sweet reviewers, thank you so much. I absolutely love it when I receive that email that tells me there is a new opinion about Pandora's Lair! Please keep them up! XD **

**I do hope the story is not too predictable. Sometimes it's hard to move the story from its natural course, specially if you want to keep yourself true to the original characters as much as you can. With that said, I plan on surprising you (I hope) in the future with some racy stuff! Be prepared!**


	9. On or Off?

Chapter Eight - On or Off?

Killua gave his back to the door with his eyes closed; he was pretending to be asleep. When Kurapica and Leorio knocked on his door to say goodbye, he went on pretending he'd been sleeping. He heard as they talked to Gon outside his room; warning him to be careful and to say good bye to Killua for them. He heard as the door closed behind them and then he felt this horrible tension grow as it daunted on him that they were now alone. He stayed still, waiting to hear what Gon would do next. The silence stretched on and then he heard the door next to his room close. Killua opened his eyes. He needed to get out of there.

Gon didn't want him to be around. He didn't want to leave but he really didn't see any other option. Killua got up from the bed and reached for his bag. He walked around the room getting all his things and putting them inside the bag. Killua felt his eyes burning again. Even though he'd been thinking about it all night, he still couldn't wrap his head around the idea of willingly leaving Gon. They'd been side by side for the last five years and even if his feelings for Gon didn't exist, it was still horribly hard to imagine what he'd do without him.

Killua's only purpose had been to help Gon and get stronger on the way. He loved to learn but most of all he loved doing it alongside Gon. How many times had he slowed himself down just to remain at his friend's side? And now here he was, packing his bag ready to leave him.

"Killua" he turned at the sudden sound of Gon's voice calling his name. He looked at his closed door; Gon had to be standing right outside. "Can I come in?" he asked. It hurt Killua that Gon would ask him something he would of thought completely unnecessary just two days ago.

"Yeah" he said without thinking. His voice was hoarse and he could listen to the exhaustion in it. Gon pushed the door open and walked in looking at the floor. Killua felt his heart starting to run.

"Killua" Gon started and lifted his head but he stopped talking as his eyes fixed Killua's hands; they were holding his bag now half filled with all this things. Gon looked up at his face. "Why are you packing?" Gon asked and Killua felt like someone had just stabbed him. He'd forgotten about his bag on the moment he heard Gon's voice. He looked back down to his hands. He tried to answer something, anything, but all he could manage was to shrug his shoulders. Gon moved next to him and sat on the bed, not taking his eyes from the bag.

"We're not leaving until tomorrow" Gon said softly; Killua knew he'd noticed that he wasn't packing for the journey.

"I thought" Killua started, his voice still sounded hoarse; he cleared his throat, "Maybe you'd feel better if you went on your own" Killua said to him, each word hurting him and Gon.

It had taken so much for Gon to walk from his room towards Killua's and now that he was there his biggest fear was just staring him in the face; Killua wanted to leave him. Gon shook his head. This just couldn't be happening. How could he have upset Killua so much to make him want to leave? What had happened that night? He just couldn't bring himself to ask Killua. _But Killua wasn't mad at me yesterday, _Gon thought, _what changed?_

"Why?" Gon wanted to know, still looking at the bag. He needed to understand more than he was afraid to hear the answer.

"I don't" Killua started and Gon braced himself, "I don't want to bother you anymore" Killua said and looked away from Gon. Gon blinked. Kurapica was right.

"You want to leave because you think I want you to?" Gon asked his friend and saw Killua nod. Gon stood up. "Killua I don't want to go on this trip without you" Gon said and Killua turned to look at him. Killua looked shocked.

_He wants me to come? _Killua didn't understand. He was sure Gon must hate him; he was sure Gon remembered. He looked at Gon's unchanging kind expression; did Gon actually remember?

"Are you sure?" Killua asked him putting down his bag on the bed and turning his body towards Gon. Gon nodded at him.

"I'm sorry Killua" Gon said to him. Killua really didn't understand. "I'm really sorry I made you think I didn't want you come. I'd never want that" Gon said speaking truthfully, "I'm sorry you're hurt" he finished. Killua felt his heart beating more peacefully and his hurt staring to disappear. Gon placed a hand on Killua's shoulder and smiled at him; Killua smiled back. In spite of everything Gon still wanted to be his friend and keep him by his side. Killua could live with the fact that Gon wouldn't answer his feelings as long as he was still considered as his best friend.

Gon felt his heart beating faster as he realized his hand was on Killua's shoulder. He felt a sudden urge to be closer to him; he wanted to feel more of Killua's milky soft skin. He moved his hand away and took a step back. Gon was going to have to learn to control himself if he wanted this to work out. He was going to have to learn to be more careful not to hurt Killua in the process.

"So the trip's back on?" Gon asked.

"It's on" Killua said to him.

"Good. Now, how about we train?" Gon asked his friend and Killua nodded. Killua finally felt like he could breathe again.

* * *

It was a cold night in the outskirts of York shin city. The desert, once warm, was now filled with the rough winds that the night brought with it. An old building stood ominously in the middle of it. Even from a distance the silence around it made the place seem chilling so that no animal was drawn to go near it. In the inside the building a group of people stood waiting for something. It had been a long time since the entire troupe got together. The last time that had happened was during the auction. Chrollo stood in front of them once more; He had managed to get Kurapica's nen removed. They rest of the troupe stood silently awaiting instructions.

"My friends" Chrollo started, they all looked his way, "The auction reunites us once more" he said opening his arms to his family. It had been too long indeed.

"What are the orders Boss?" Phinks asked leaning his back on a wall of the deserted building.

"We have two missions to carry out from here" He said and they all looked at each other. "First the auction will go on like the last time. That means that Shalnark, Kurotopi, Shizuku, Feitan and Bololenov will stay here. For the rest we have another more important mission" Chrollo said and they looked back expectantly. "Machi has been looking in to Pandora's Lair. I've requested her to find out all she can about the surroundings" he said and looked at Machi to continue.

"It's not an easy journey; it's almost impossible to go on your own. I came back to return with a team" She said in her cool monotonous voice.

"I'm sending Machi and the rest of you to persuade the Elder to leave his life as a hermit. Alive" Chrollo explained. They all looked back at him; a smile crept on Nobunaga's lips.

"Do you know what it is Boss?" Nobunaga asked Chrollo; Chrollo looked at him, "The Elder's nen ability?" he asked and all the troupe members looked at their boss eagerly. The corners of Chrollo's lips rose as he nodded slowly. There was a thick, meaningful silence within the dark room which contained the world's most feared criminals. The excitement in Nobunaga made his aura pulse out of his body as he left out a laugh. Chrollo would soon have the most revered Nen ability; and that chain user would have no option but to join them or die.

* * *

**Disclaimer: I do not own HunterxHunter.**

**Side Note : Pum, pum pum... the plot thickens. Sorry it took a bit longer to upload. I've been having a hard time deciding how to divide the chapters so that they'll make sense. It has proven harder than I though. I do hope everyone reading is finding the story all right, in terms of continuity. I'm worried that as the series goes along it might clash with some of the new ideas I'm proposing so please bear with me; this is a spin off from the story from the point were our beautiful boys encounter Kaito. **

**Reviewers : What would my life be without you? I hope you enjoy this chapter too! Let me know your thoughts and hopes and dreams about the story! **

**If your reading and haven't reviewed I really hope that you might one day want to leave a comment! XD Know it would make me a very happy writer and happy writers are productive writers!**


	10. Rocking the Boat

Chapter Nine – Rocking the Boat

Gon practically flew from one side of the small boat to the other. He gritted his teeth and looked at Killua like he was ready to kill him. They had been on the boat for two weeks now and since he had discovered Killua's alcohol stash on the first day and thrown it out, all they did was fight. Gon had woken up that morning as usual to train and keep guard on the storm front only to find that Killua had been sneakier than he'd thought with the bottles.

"Why the hell did you have to throw that one out?" Killua yelled at Gon as he jumped right after him. Gon jumped back to the other side; fighting in such a confined space just made everything worse.

"Why do you have to drink? You know perfectly well how fast weather changes here! What if something happened and you had to be alert? You could get us killed Killua!" Gon yelled back at him. Killua grabbed a bucket close by and threw it at Gon, he deflected it but in doing so he almost fell off the boat.

"Mind your own business" was all Killua said as he put his hands in his pockets and walked down to where they slept. He was so mad at Gon; wasn't it already bad enough that he had thrown all his things out of the boat? One more miserable bottle, which he basically used to sleep, and Gon turned into Mito-san in her worst day.

He looked gloomily at the bunk beds in front of him. Two weeks into this wretched trip and Killua was ready to kill his best friend. He had been naïve to think that that one conversation with Gon before they left would solve everything. Things had been tense from the moment they set sail and Killua realized just how alone they were, and with no means of escape. Some pretty harsh storms had hit the small boat, but none of them were as harsh as the one brewing inside Killua.

Killua honestly thought that he could keep his feelings in check and try his best not to get in Gon's way or cross any sort of line, but the more time that passed the angrier he got. _Who the hell does he think he is? _Killua thought to himself furiously. It's not like he was in love with him like a stupid little girl and still Gon had pushed him as far as he could. _Does he just think he's so damn irresistible? _They already slept in different beds. Gon never came close to touching him unless they were training or fighting. He wouldn't keep eye contact with Killua for more than three seconds, and that was on a good day! Yes, all that frustration was quickly turning into resentment.

He climbed up to the top bunk and tried to calm himself. Killua knew that it was just a matter of one more push and he just might scream all those things at Gon. He needed to control himself. _Why? Why the hell do I have to control myself all the time?_ Killua thought, the anger refusing to go away.

Up on the deck, Gon wasn't having an easy time either. He was so tired. He wanted to sleep; he needed it. He felt all he did was keep watch and train and fight with Killua; all the time, over and over again. Whenever he tried to sleep all he could do was stare up knowing that Killua was resting above him. He felt so far away from him. Each day Gon tried and tried to fight all his natural impulses and keep Killua in a safe distance, but he only felt that all his efforts were met with more anger from Killua. Was Gon doing something wrong? He was just so tired of thinking this over and over in his head.

Yes, to Killua it was just one little bottle, but to Gon was him having to deal with the fact that Killua became too alluring for him whenever he drank. Gon just couldn't deal with that, he just wasn't strong enough. He closed his eyes and let a sigh slip through his lips. They had been on that boat for two weeks now and he felt like it had been a year. He never thought that being around Killua would turn out to be so exhausting. Had it been a good idea to come all this way under these circumstances? Gon wasn't sure of anything anymore.

The day went on without any eventful fights or storms and Gon just stayed far away from Killua. He looked down at the sea chart. According to their predictions, Gon thought it might take them two or three days to get there. Hopefully there wouldn't be any more unpredictable storms to delay them any further. He didn't want to spend more time in this small space with Killua. Then again what would change once they were on the island? He sighed again and faced the fact that it was time to go back down.

He walked down the small flight of stairs and felt the immediate tension rise as Killua noticed his closeness.

"Killua?" Gon asked checking to see if he was awake.

"What?" Killua answered harshly. Gon sighed at the icy tone.

"I only did it for your own good. Can you please stop being mad at me" Gon said sitting on the bed. He was so tired. Killua jumped off the bed and stood looking down at Gon. Who did he think he was? Just sitting there looking all superior and tired like he had been the one going through something. It was his own damn fault for hanging around this immature, naïve, idiot all the time. Gon looked up at him; _Killua's mad at me. _

"What now Killua?" Gon asked feeling utterly defeated. Killua felt his nostrils flare; he'd had enough. Killua grabbed Gon by the collar of his shirt and threw him against the wall. Gon looked at him in surprise.

"Stop treating me like that!" Killua demanded letting go of Gon's shirt.

"Treating you like what?" Gon asked feeling the anger rise in him too. He'd had it with him; all Gon ever did was try and make him feel better and all he got in return were Killua's never ending mood swings.

"Like you're so much better than me! Like I'm an idiot!" Killua yelled at him.

"Well maybe if you stopped acting like it!" Gon yelled back. He was so tired he could hear his voice straining itself as he yelled.

"I'm not the one that is mentally handicapped!" Killua yelled and stormed out of the room and went up to the deck. _Mentally handicapped?_ Gon ran right after him.

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?" Gon asked him furiously. He got it when people treated him like a little kid all the time, but he wasn't used to get that crap from Killua.

"It's exhausting being around you! You're such a kid! You don't know anything about anything!" Killua yelled back at him.

"I'm not a kid Killua. We're the exact same age and if someone here is acting like a baby all the time it's you!" Gon said accusingly, he felt so hurt Killua would say that to him. He thought that Killua understood him better than anyone. Besides the only reason Gon was tired right now was because he was no longer a child. "And I know stuff Killua I'm not a little kid" Gon said feeling his voice shake. Killua looked at him and let out a laugh.

"Ha! Yeah right Gon. You're the most ridiculously immature person in the world" Killua said to him still laughing. Gon felt himself blush.

"Oh yeah?" Gon asked; he finally had enough, "Does a kid stay up all night thinking about touching you?" Gon asked, he couldn't stop himself. Killua stopped laughing immediately and looked at Gon with his mouth hanging open, "Or stares at you when you take your shirt off like an idiot? Waiting for you to keep going? Or wanders all the time how it'd feel to feel your weight over me? Or want to reach out and just grab you all the time? Do kids do that? Huh? Do they?" Gon went on. He really couldn't stop, he felt like all the stress from those two weeks was finally starting to lift off his shoulders. He didn't care how Killua reacted, he just wanted to stop him from thinking he was something he clearly wasn't anymore.

Killua was sure he looked like an absolute idiot just standing there with his mouth hanging open. Was he hearing right? Had Gon actually implied what he thought he'd implied?

"Uh" was all Killua managed to say, "No?" he finished. He saw how Gon's face went from angry to embarrassed slowly as he realized what he'd just said. Gon's face was completely red; he turned around and just walked back down without another word. Killua could hear his heart thumping hard in his chest. No, this wasn't possible. It wasn't possible that all this time Gon had the same feelings for him and they'd been stupidly just pushing each other away. He felt his feet move on their own and walk down to the small room. He saw Gon sitting on the bed with his face buried in his hands.

"I'm so sorry" Gon said when he felt Killua walk into the room. Killua didn't say anything, "I tried so hard to not do or say anything stupid. I don't want you to hate me" Gon said and Killua could tell Gon was probably about to cry.

"Gon" he said moving a little closer to him. Gon still wouldn't look up, "Gon, I could never hate you" Killua said.

"I don't know what's wrong with me. Every time I try not to think about you it just gets worse and worse. I'm so tired of pretending everything's fine when it's clearly not. I hate sleeping so far away from you. I hate not being able to treat you the same way I've always treated you. Please don't hate me; I really don't know what's wrong with me" Gon said, letting all his feelings out. Killua felt like he'd just walked into a dream. He sat down next to Gon slowly.

"I know how you feel" He said to his friend. Gon shook his head. Killua hesitated but he put his hand on Gon's shoulder. He felt Gon tense under his hand.

"No you don't" he said so softly that Killua could barely hear him.

"No Gon, I mean it, I know how you feel. I know _exactly _how you feel" Killua said to him. Gon started to lift his head slightly without looking at him. He could see that his face was still red and tears were starting to fall down his cheeks. He looked at Gon as what he said started to sink in. Killua moved his hand from Gon's shoulder.

"Exactly?" Gon asked softly not daring to look at Killua. Killua looked away from him.

"I'm not sure when it happened, but something changed between us" Killua said to him, "I hate sleeping that far away from you too. I hate that I can't reach out and touch you either. I really hate the gawking stupidly when you take your shirt off" Killua said and Gon let out a little laugh at the last statement. Killua felt like his face was on fire but his chest had never felt lighter. Telling Gon what was going on inside him made him feel like all that distance that had been created between them was starting to disappear.

"I hate having to dive in the cold water whenever my mind wanders off too much" Gon said and Killua let out a laugh and nodded.

"I really hated those girls from the hotel" Killua said and they both laughed.

"I kinda hated them too" Gon said looked at Killua. Killua turned to look at him. "What do we do now?" Gon asked him. Killua saw the look of absolute exhaustion in his tanned friend's face.

"How about we sleep?" Killua asked and Gon smiled and nodded. Killua moved into the bed and Gon followed him. They both lay looking up at the ceiling. Killua felt Gon's warmth next to him and in spite of his heart beating a million miles an hour, he too felt tired. Gon turned to his side to face Killua.

"Can I hug you?" Gon asked softly. Killua felt his heart melt. Killua stretched his arm so Gon could rest his head and hug him. Gon put his arm over Killua's chest and Killua bended his arm so he could stroke Gon's hair.

"Sleep tight Freecs" Killua whispered to him. Gon rubbed his face against Killua's shoulder and sighed.

"You too Killu" Gon whispered back wrapping his arm tighter around his friend. Gon knew that they needed to talk more about all of this so he could understand and accept the fact that Killua felt the same way about him. But right now all he wanted to do was sleep; sleep with Killua's warmth and smell rocking him slowly into the deepest and sweetest of dreams.

* * *

**Disclaimer : I do not own HunterxHunter**

**Side Note : Hey readers I hope you like this one! I know it seemed there for a second like the tension was stretching on too long, but trust me when I say I'm just trying to slowly build up a good story. Sorry if you find many mistakes! I am in this moment about to board a plane so this note was a bit rushed! I love you all and I'll be back with more... probably much later because I'll be on a plane all day tomorrow so patience! XD**


	11. A Change in Plans

Chapter Ten – A Change in Plans

Kurapica stared up at the digital screen on the elevator. He saw the number increase and looked back at his hand. He held the card key to one of the rooms of the hotel. The elevator door opened at the second to last floor. Kurapica scoffed at the elegance of the floor. _He just had to pick the best one, _he thought to himself. He walked all the way to the room written on his card and stopped. Did he really want to go back down this road? Seeing Gon and Killua made him think that he might someday want what they had and yet here he was.

He swiped the card and saw the light at the door turn from red to green. He pushed the door open and found the room predictably dark. The curtains where pulled back so he made no move to turn them on. He heard the shower going inside the bathroom; if hadn't grown so accustomed to this same routine his heartbeat might have given his nerves away. The truth was he still couldn't feel completely relaxed around him, he was sure he might never do so. He heard the shower stop.

Kurapica walked to the window and looked down. It was late but still York Shin city was busy with hundreds and hundreds of people walking about. He'd been on the auction the day before and thought people might have left this city dead but it was a hectic as ever. Kurapica heard the door to the bathroom open and the hairs on the back of his neck stood; he'll never feel at ease. Kurapica shook his head; he was sure that no one had ever felt at ease in his presence anyway.

"How nice of you to come, my lovely Kurata" He said to Kurapica and he turned to face him. As likely as ever, he stood looking at him drenched with only a towel over his head. Kurapica turned around to face the window again.

"Hisoka" he said as a form of greeting. He felt Hisoka moving behind him. He sincerely hopped he was looking for his clothes.

"There is that enchanting coldness" Hisoka said in his soft, sensuous voice.

"You said you had information that might interest me?" Kurapica said turning for a second before he realized Hisoka had no intention to look for his clothes.

"I do. Why do you smell so good? It's almost as you were covered in rich, aggressive honey?" Hisoka said not really meaning it as a question. Long ago Kurapica had become accustomed to the way he talked.

"You know the answer to that" he said coolly.

"Gon" Hisoka said and Kurapica could almost hear the lust in his voice.

"Yes, I was with him over a week ago. I'm surprised you can still smell him on me" Kurapica said honestly. He saw Hisoka shrug from the corner of his eye.

"It's difficult to let go of some very particular smells" Hisoka said and Kurapica knew he would trail off if he didn't make him focus soon.

"The information Hisoka" Kurapica pressed on. He heard Hisoka clicking his tongue behind him.

"It's always all work and no play with you" Hisoka said sounding slightly disappointed. Kurapica said nothing and just waited.

"Well you do know that the duplicator returned to his family?" Hisoka asked.

"I'm well aware that Chrollo is back with the troupe" Kurapica said feeling the anger rise in his body, "Not in small part thanks to you" he added, his tone turning icier by the second.

"I have my reasons as you well know" Hisoka said shrugging again. Kurapica felt a sudden urge to leave. Why had he even bothered to come? "I heard the big family has divided and the half with my very important person has set off to a very particular mission" Hisoka continued.

"They split up?" Kurapica asked turning his body slightly. Finally he said something he could work with; Hisoka nodded. Kurapica saw the moonlight bouncing off his body.

"They're off to an island to look for this elder who Chrollo wants to use his sneaky little trick to steal from; it's supposed to be the best one yet" Hisoka went on and Kurapica's heart stopped.

"Pandora?" He asked alarmed.

"Bingo!" Hisoka said, his sly smile spreading through his face.

"No" Kurapica said not daring to believe it. Gon would get to the Island in a few weeks. How was he supposed to stop them from finding them? If they found Gon and Killua first… "Gon" he felt the sound escape his lips before he could stop himself.

"Oh? Two important people in the place! Now I just _have_ to go" Hisoka said figuring everything out from just two small words. Kurapica had to hand it to him, he was incredibly clever.

"I have to go" Kurapica decided. He just couldn't leave his friends unprotected. He looked back out the window. If they ran into the troupe, Gon and Killua wouldn't hesitate to attack. Those two were just too cocky to back away; they would get themselves killed. He felt Hisoka move behind him. He looked back but didn't see him and then he saw him slam a hand on the window before him and then leaned closer to him. Kurapica jumped slightly in surprise. He was quick as always.

"The more the merrier" Hisoka whispered in his ear. Kurapica felt all the hairs in his body jump up and a chill go all through him. He stayed perfectly still. Hisoka thrust his other hand into the front of Kurapica's pants and grabbed him. Kurapica felt himself gasp and leaned both his hands against the window. "Now it's time for play" Hisoka whispered again as he began to stroke him slowly. Kurapica could see the window before him starting to fog with his breath and he couldn't help but let out a moan. "Good. Now show me those delectable red eyes my Kurata" Hisoka whispered and ran the tip of his tongue up Kurapica's neck and the side of his face.

* * *

**Disclaimer : I do not own HunterxHunter**

**Side Note : I wonder how many of you saw that one coming. HIIIIIIIISSSSSSSSSSSOOOOOOOOKKKKAAAAAAAAA! He is my absolutely favorite HxH character! As I had planned and now showed you guys, Hisoka will play a very important roll in this story apart from being a humongous pervert. I hope you guys enjoy him as much as I do. **

**Thanks reviewers! I really enjoyed getting Gon and Killua to get over themselves too. I've noticed, during my life experience, that when you care about someone a lot, that's when your insecurities flail out the most (explaining Killua's behavior). Fortunately, Gon is a very outspoken character so the likely-hood of him being the one to burst it out, made this story easier to tell. **

**Now, I had to divide this chapter because with the next part it was just too damn long. But the next chapter I will probably post later today and I'm really hoping you'll like it because it the one I've enjoyed writing the most XP**


	12. More

**Warning : Explicit Yaoi content (Finally!)**

* * *

Chapter Eleven - More

Killua had been the first one to wake up the next morning but he didn't move a muscle. He woke to discover Gon's forehead against his cheek and his hand softly over his neck; he smiled to himself for the sweetness of that moment. He tried not to smile and keep his eyes closed but he just couldn't contain his happiness.

Before he had fallen asleep with Gon hugging him, Killua analyzed the situation over and over again. It pained him to admit he had been swayed by all his insecurities. It had never crossed his mind that Gon might be pushing him away for the same reasons he was. He just assumed it was because Gon was rejecting him; that thought made it harder to keep his smile in check. Gon had thought the exact same thing about him. It wasn't just the physical position they were in, just knowing that Gon had been going through the same thing made him feel closer than ever to his friend. Killua closed his eyes and leaned his cheek closer to Gon's forehead.

Killua started to feel like he just might fall asleep again when he felt Gon's thumb stroke his jaw gently. Gon was waking up; as the tanned boy started to stretch against him, butterflies started to brew in his belly. What was he supposed to do now? He knew what he _wanted_ to do but in the back of his head Leorio kept popping up telling him he couldn't take advantage of him. Yeah, Killua knew now that Gon wasn't that innocent or indifferent but he seriously doubted his friend actually _knew_ what he wanted to do. Killua on the other hand, had revisited scenarios over and over again in his head, scrutinizing every single detail of what he wanted to do to Gon.

Killua lay perfectly still wondering what to do next and he was suddenly overwhelmed by the idea that Gon might be thinking the same thing. He knew Gon was awake but he didn't move an inch either. Another vicious circle?

"Morning" Killua managed to say, though not in a very secure or audible voice. Still Gon heard him; Killua felt him tense immediately after he heard his voice. He couldn't help but smile now sure that his friend had also been focused in his thoughts of what to do next.

"Morning Killu" Gon said back to him in the same low whisper. He felt Gon rigid against him. Killua didn't want Gon to move away from him just yet, so he managed to move his hand and place it over Gon's wrist and stroke it slowly with his thumb. He felt Gon relax at once, even though now he felt like he might be able to fry an egg on his face.

"Did you sleep well?" Killua asked feeling that question came out just as awkward as he felt. Gon left out a little laugh and Killua felt his breath on his chest.

"I slept" Gon said with his voice a little more confident. Killua smiled to himself, he knew what he meant. Having to sleep away from him all those days meant he gotten practically no sleep for two weeks. That he understood perfectly. "Killu?" Gon started to ask.

"Yeah?" Killua asked nervously wondering what Gon was going to ask him now.

"Can you even feel your arm?" Gon asked and Killua let out a laugh.

"I actually think it might have turned blue" Killua said truthfully. He's noticed his arm was completely numb a while back but he didn't want Gon to move. "Consequences of having such a big head" he added and his laugh was choked as Gon punched him on his side.

"I can fix it" Gon said and moved away from him. Killua felt a pang of longing until he noticed Gon balancing himself on top of him. Killua's heart stopped beating; then Gon moved completely to the other side of Killua. "See?" Gon asked getting himself in the same position but on the other side of Killua. That single gesture, that second, had made Killua want to be much closer to Gon than this. He moved his face a little farther from Gon and looked down at him; Gon looked up at his face and their eyes locked for a second. Gon looked away first. _Calm down Killua, _he told himself. He'd been dreaming about this moment for months now. The least he could do is show some patience.

"So how many more days do you think we still have on this ship?" Killua asked trying to distract himself and Gon from the situation. Gon relaxed again and they started to talk about Gon's predictions about the weather.

As the time crept by, they stayed on the bed talking; listening to the rain falling slowly on the deck above them. It felt like it had been such a long time ago since they had really talked and now with the added pleasure of not needing an excuse to move away from each other. They did move around in as the day went by but they never left the bed or kept a big distance between them. They talked about the ship and Pandora, they talked about Gon's dad and Kaito and they talked about what Gon and Killua expected from all this. They talked and talked just enjoying each other's company. They heard as the rain started to fall a little bit harder each time, but nothing to be too worried about.

At one point Gon and Killua's heads rested on different ends of the bed but Gon had one arm around one of Killua's legs while he talked and Killua played with Gon's toes as he listened.

"Sometimes" Gon was saying; the subject resting, as it always seemed to do, on his father, "Sometimes I feel like I'm getting stronger so that I can find him, but then other times I feel like I'm doing it to show it off when he sees me" he finished with a smile on his face.

"Sometimes I feel like I want to do it to beat mine up" Killua said and they both laughed and then a long silence followed as they both thought about it.

"I don't want to turn in to him" Gon said breaking the silence first, "I feel like my drive to find him and leave everything else behind is turning me into him" he confessed and felt something heaving lifting from his chest. Killua felt the same thing as he heard Gon's words; he had been thinking the same thing.

"I miss it" Killua said simply he felt Gon raise his head a little to look at him.

"The killing?" Gon asked him. Killua smiled at Gon's ability to understand him. He nodded.

"Sometimes when I'm fighting I have his need to go for it. Feel all the power and the rush again" he said thinking about it. Gon lifted himself up a bit and balanced his weight back on his elbows. "Then I imagine what I look like from the outside and I feel like I'm turning into as big a sociopath as him, or Ilumi or Hisoka even" He said mimicking Gon's body.

"You won't" Gon said to him sitting up, "Even if you do kill someone, you won't be like them. You care about people" he said looking at Killua seriously. He felt himself blush a little.

"I don't really care that much about people Gon" Killua confessed with a little laugh.

"Yes you do! You've tagged along with me all this time to help me find my dad. That's caring about people" Gon said to him.

"That's not caring about people its caring about you and even that was a bit selfish because regardless of what you were doing I just wanted to tag along" Killua said to him. Gon shook his head.

"It's not selfish if the other person needs you there! I know I've pissed you off a lot of times along the way and you stayed there. None of them would have done that for anyone" Gon said to him. Killua sat up bended his knees. Gon rested his chin on one of them, "You're not your dad, or Ilumi or Hisoka" He said more to himself than to Killua, "You're Killua!" he said smiling up at Killua, he couldn't help but smile back, "My Killua" Gon added and Killua felt his cheeks burning but more than that he felt so much gratitude for Gon. If Gon wouldn't accept him as much as he did, Killua wouldn't know what to do with himself. He closed his eyes and leaned his forehead on Gon's.

"Thanks Gon" Killua said meaning it from the bottom of his heart. He was just about to tell Gon that there wasn't even a small chance that he would turn into his dad when he opened his eyes and saw Gon's fixed on his lips. All of a sudden the atmosphere changed completely; Killua went from feeling thankful and friend-like to wanting to ravish him. Killua gulped and tried to control himself. He moved one of his hands slowly and gently stroked the side of Gon's face; barely touching his skin. To Killua's surprise Gon moved much faster than he expected; he moved both his hands to the side of Killua's face and pulled himself up and closer to him so that their foreheads and noses were touching. Killua could see Gon's lips slightly parted. Gon, who hadn't taken his eyes from Killua's lips, looked up at him for a second.

"What" Killua heard Gon say softly, feeling his breath close to his lips, "What now?" he asked Killua. Killua looked back at him; he could think of about a million things that he wanted to tell Gon he was supposed to do now. Killua took a deep breath and tried to slow himself down.

"Just do whatever you feel like doing" Killua said to him in a soft voice. He thought his face probably felt pretty hot under Gon's hands. Gon looked like he was thinking about it. He looked back down at Killua's lips; he knew he wanted to touch them. Tentatively, he moved one of his thumbs and brushed it slowly over his lips; Killua felt himself melt a little. Gon kept on looking; _no, that wasn't close enough. _Gon felt his own lips so far away and, before he could think more about it, he closed them over Killua's. Yes, that was _exactly _what he wanted to do. He never thought that such a small thing could make him feel so warm all over his body. He pulled Killua's face closer to his and kissed him again; this time with more certainty of what he was doing. He closed his eyes to feel him better and somehow he just couldn't stop closing his lips over Killua's. Gon felt Killua's hand drop from the side of his face and he pulled back a little and opened his eyes to see Killua's face. Killua's eyes were still closed and his whole face was flushed; Gon could even see that his parted lips looked a little flushed.

"Killu?" he asked slowly and was startled as Killua opened his eyes suddenly fixating them on him. Gon felt his heart beating very hard under his chest. He'd never seen Killua giving him that look, Gon felt himself blushing. He felt one of Killua's hands close over his shirt and pull him closer. Killua held him so close that Gon could feel him breathing into his mouth. He moved his other hand and ran his fingers through the side of Gon's head and when he reached his neck he pulled on his hair slightly. Gon felt himself breathing heavily; he thought Killua looked almost hungry.

Suddenly the ship jerked violently to the side and sent them both flying out of the bed and land with a loud bang across the narrow space. It was like someone had splashed them cold water in the face. They looked at each other; their faces were still flushed and their breathing harsh.

"I'm gonna go check" Gon said getting up and running out the door. Killua's eyes followed him. _Gon kissed me._ His heart was still thumping, threatening to come out of his chest. _Gon and I were just kissing, _Killua took a deep breath; _he kissed me. _Killua tried to shake his head in a weak effort to try and snap himself out of it. He had to calm down; he got up on his feet and felt his knees shaking slightly. He smiled failing miserably at calming himself down. He'd imagined the moment a million times in his head but nothing, absolutely nothing, came close to what that had felt like. Killua heard the rain pouring on the deck and heard Gon's footsteps probably making their way back. Killua took a deep breath and looked for a towel.

Gon walked back down stairs completely soaked as he predicted.

"Nothing bad happened to the ship, the storm doesn't look that bad" Gon said walking over to him. Killua covered Gon's hair with the towel and rubbed his head trying to dry him.

"Do we have to stand guard?" Killua asked praying with all his might that Gon would shake his head. He did. "Are you sure it's safe?" Killua asked trying to fight his impulses a bit. He felt Gon close his hand on his shirt this time; the towel fell to the floor as Gon looked up at him.

"I don't really care" Gon said pulling him close and kissing him again. Killua was happy to oblige and he was ecstatic as he felt Gon kiss him a bit harsher now. He grabbed the side of Gon's face and pressed his lips harder on his. As he realized what he was doing he pushed himself slightly apart. Gon opened his eyes and looked at him not really letting Killua move too far. "I want" he started but he trailed off like he wasn't sure what it was he wanted.

"What?" Killua asked. He was happy to give him whatever he asked as long as he actually asked for it. Gon stopped for a second looking away and then he looked back at Killua's lips and nodded.

"More" He said simply and closed his lips over Killua's again. Killua was about to think he was dreaming again, when he felt Gon's tongue softly pressing against his lips. He immediately parted his lips and met him with his own; he heard Gon moan softly into his mouth. Gon tasted too sweet to be true. He grabbed Killua's shirt and pushed him on the wall and pressed himself on him. Killua could feel Gon's whole body through his drenched clothes. Between that and Gon's kisses it was too much to ask for Killua's body not too react. He pushed Gon away and saw his friend look up to him slightly confused.

"You're soaking wet. You're gonna catch a cold with that on" Killua said just to give himself a moment to gather his bearings. Gon just pulled off his shirt and started to undo his pants. _Well that backfired._ He couldn't help but look as Gon stood in front of him with just his soaking wet underpants on. It was like he died and went to pervert heaven.

"Your turn" Gon said to him. Killua felt his mouth hanging slightly open; he suddenly felt very silly wanting to calm himself due to Gon's _innocence._ When Killua didn't move to take off his clothes Gon just proceeded to pull off his shirt.

"Gon" he said to him trying to understand what was happening but before he knew it his pants were also around his ankles and he was looking at Gon looking at him.

Killua had the most perfect skin, Gon thought to himself. He reached out and touched his chest and it felt like cold silk caressing his fingers. Gon had never felt so intoxicated in his life; he just couldn't stop touching Killua. He'd never felt something as amazing as feeling Killua's tongue touching his and all he could think is how he wanted more. He pulled Killua's hand and made him sit on the bed; he felt like his sate was just further encouraged by the way Killua looked at him with that hunger. He felt like he might have been looking at Killua in the same way.

He moved closer to him and sat on top of him; Gon rested his forehead on Killua's. He moved slightly to fit better on top of him and Killua buried his face on his chest and let out a moan.

"What?" Gon asked and he heard Killua let out a small laugh against his chest.

"You can't just do stuff like that and pretend I'll stay calm" Killua said against his chest. Gon felt Killua's hands running up his legs; his fingertips sinking into his skin. Gon grabbed Killua's face and made him look at him. He moved over him again and saw Killua's face transform in to something wonderful as he moaned again.

"Who the hell said you were supposed to stay calm?" Gon asked him. Killua looked back up at him. Gon was right, _fuck patience. _He grabbed Gon harshly by his hips and pressed him against him. He tossed Gon against the bed and fell on top of him and buried his face in his neck. He kissed Gon's neck and moved his body against him. He heard Gon moan and felt him hard against him. He moved his face and looked in to Gon's; he kissed him deeply and then pulled apart.

"You want more?" Killua asked him and saw Gon nod back in response. Killua smiled at him and moved his hand in between them and reached into his underwear to grab him. Gon gasped still looking in to Killua's eyes. Killua closed his lips over Gon's as he started to stroke him. Gon moaned into his mouth once more, this time much louder. There was no way Killua would be able to stop himself anymore. Gon felt so perfectly warm and firm under his grip. He kissed Gon's neck again and felt the vibrations of Gon's groaning against his lips.

Gon was completely sure he was going to die from the pleasure that was building up all over his body. He sunk his fingers into the bed and grabbed on to the sheets. He felt Killua's lips kissing his neck and the warmth of his breathing made goose bumps form all over his skin. Killua's hand stroking him slowly and rhythmically made his toes curl. Gon felt Killua moving to kiss his collar bone and he felt his other hand pulling down slowly at the corner of his underpants. Gon moved to pull them off and laid back on the bed. He saw Killua staring at him and felt himself blush; he was on his side with his mouth hanging slightly open and his eyes moved all over him. Killua was just about to grab him again when Gon felt the urge to be over him. Gon pushed Killua over and moved on top of him; his hands resting at Killua's sides. He looked at Killua's face and they stared in each other's eyes for what seemed like hours; both of them breathing heavily. He saw Killua gulp.

"More?" he asked softly. Gon lowered himself, balancing himself on his elbows, Killua's legs on the sides of his body. Gon moved his hands to stroke Killua's silver hair, it felt like the softest cloud. He leaned closer to kiss him again. He moved to look at him again and nodded.

Killua was blushing more than ever. He took a deep breath in and moved so he now laid giving his back to Gon. Killua felt his heart beating hard against the bed and wondered if Gon was going to ask him what he was supposed to do and make him die of embarrassment. To his surprise Gon just leaned into him and kissed the nape of his neck. Killua felt him run his hand over his shoulder and touch him softly all the way down. When he reached the edge of Killua's underwear he stopped kissing him.

Gon looked down at Killua, he wondered if he was allowed to just pull them off. He thought about asking Killua but he thought he probably wouldn't listen if he said no so he just moved slightly to Killua's side and pulled them off. Suddenly Gon understood why Killua had been looking at him that way. He felt his heart racing and his breathing get heavier at the sight of Killua's naked body. He felt like he wanted to touch and kiss every bit of the milky skin. He reached out and ran his fingers over him, feeling the skin from his lower back to his legs. He felt Killua's muscles tense under his touch; he leaned over Killua and kissed his back right under his shoulder blades. Gon kissed the side of his ribs and kept running his hand over Killua's body; he noticed that Killua's body would clench every time he would slide his hand over his bottom. Curiously Gon applied more pressure to his touch and focused solely on this particular area; he could hear Killua's breath getting heavier. He lowered his body and without moving his hands he leaned close to him and kissed his cheek.

He couldn't help grabbing Killua a little harder as he kissed him even more. He was so absorbed on what he was doing that he jumped slightly in surprise when he suddenly heard Killua moan. He looked back at him and saw Killua burring his face on the sheets with his hands clasped into fists on the side; his fists where holding on to the bed. _He liked it,_ Gon thought to himself. He looked back at his hand and saw his thumb had moved in between Killua's cheeks without him noticing; to the cold touch of Killua's skin he was surprised at how warm he was there. Suddenly even more curious Gon rubbed his thumb over Killua; he moaned again. Yes, he was sure Killua liked that. He lowered his face and kissed him again, caressing him with his thumb.

_How is Gon even doing any of this?_ Killua thought to himself franticly feeling his fingers beginning to tear the fabric under them. He was sure that Gon was completely ignorant to any of these things and here he was, lying on his stomach being completely subdued by him. He felt Gon thumb move away from him and allowed himself to calm down a bit until he felt it being replaced by his lips; a shiver when all the way up his spine.

"Gon" he heard himself say and he lifted his head to look back and saw Gon's body completely leaning over him. He felt Gon's tongue running over him now and he groaned with the pleasure of it. He looked at his hands and saw that they had completely ripped through the sheets.

Gon felt himself so turned on at the sound of Killua's moaning; his body was so warm against his mouth. He moved apart a bit and ran his fingers over him; he wasn't exactly sure why but he felt the sudden urge to know how it felt like to be inside Killua. He pressed his finger against him and slipped himself inside. He felt a low moan in his own throat hidden under the sound Killua made; he felt even more unbelievably warm and soft inside. Gon looked down at himself; he felt like his body wanted to explode and he was throbbing. He looked back at his finger and knew exactly what he wanted to do. He pulled his hand from Killua and moved over him.

"Killua" he said against his ear, "I want to be closer to you. I need more" he whispered to him, his body feeling more frantic as he felt Killua's body against his. Killua moved his hand to the back of Gon's neck pulling him closer.

"I need that too" he heard him whisper back. Gon grabbed himself and felt the tip of his body touch Killua. He pushed his hips forward and felt himself sinking into Killua's warm body. It was the most amazing feeling he'd experienced yet; he moved deeper inside him slowly and felt Killua's body stretching itself against him. He felt his moaning coming from deep inside his body; he moved one of his hand's to Killua's shoulder to allow himself to settle himself completely inside him. Gon felt like his body was on fire, he'd never felt more pleasure in all his life. He heard a soft sound coming from Killua; Gon looked at him and felt alarmed to see him look pained with tears forming on the corner of his eyes.

"Killua" he said in surprise ready to move out of him but Killua grabbed his hand.

"Don't you dare move away" he said to him and Gon felt himself smile a little with relief. He felt Killua grab his other hand, which was on his other side, and slid it under them. He placed Gon's hand around him just like he had grabbed him. Gon moved his hand slowly over him and he felt Killua's body starting to relax a little. Gon understood; he had to stay perfectly still and let Killua relax himself to him. He moved his hand over Killua over and over again and kissed his neck. Slowly Killua began to melt his body into a more relaxed position and started to let little whimpers escape his lips again. Gon relaxed too, seeing Killua no longer in pain; he felt himself throbbing inside Killua.

Killua pushed his hips back and Gon felt the pleasure of that movement going all over his body. He tried to catch his breath but Killua moved again a little further from him and them back close, making Gon forget that he was supposed to be moving his hand. This time he moved his own body and heard Killua moan at the same time he did. He moved slowly at first, but as the pleasure started to climb, so did his pace. He moved both his hands to Killua's hips to steady his movements and sunk his forehead on Killua's back. He moved deeper and faster; his movements harsh. He was unable to remember or worry about Killua's pain; the more he moved the cloudier his mind got.

He felt his body finally give in to the pleasure of it all and explode; he heard himself practically scream at the feeling that took over his entire body. He let his weight fall over Killua and felt his whole body shaking weakly. Killua moved his hand to Gon's hair and stroked the back of his neck. Gon couldn't think, he could barely understand why his body had taken a mind of his own but he finally felt satisfied. He decided to move away from Killua and lay be his side. He heard Killua groan at him pulling himself out. He moved to Killua's side and turned to look at him. Killua moved his body to face Gon's too and leaned in closer and kissed Gon softly. Gon pulled Killua closer by his neck and rested his arm over him; Killua wrapped his arm over Gon's waist.

"Killua" Gon started as he lowered his eyes, "Was that" he started to ask and Killua felt a smile creeping on his lips, "Did we just" he stopped himself again. Killua was amazed he could still feel embarrassed after that.

"Have sex?" Killua said finishing his question. Gon looked back up at him and nodded.

"Yeah" Killua said and saw Gon letting that sink in, "What'd you think? Like it?" Killua asked half teasing him. Gon nodded again.

"Yeah I really did" he admitted bluntly, "That was amazing" he said and Killua let a laugh escape his lips. He hugged Gon closer and kissed him again. Killua was never able to fully understand the concept of happiness; that one moment when everything was just perfect. Now, hugging Gon in that tiny, smelly ship, he felt like he was truly happy for the first time in his life. He was complete.

* * *

**Disclaimer : I do not own HunterxHunter**

**Side Note : Well I really hope you enjoyed that one as much as I did! I'm hoping that all my years reading romantic novels finally paid off and actually served a purpose. If you did actually enjoy it and want to read more I'd say I'll feel more encouraged to write more if you click that nice little button marked as Favorite (just kidding! ... well maybe not completely) Please let me know what you think and I hope that you stick around to find out what is in store for these boys!**

**To my faithful reviewers : I'm glad you liked my little Hisoka intervention in the last chapter and yes I know he's the biggest perv in the planet but that's part of his charm! Thank you so much for your comments! **


	13. Unnerving Feeling

Chapter Twelve – Unnerving Feeling

Gon woke up the next morning realizing that his dream of being in the snow was due to the fact that he was currently freezing and naked. He looked to his side and found Killua was gone from it. Gon got up from the bed and looked for something to cover himself with. He smiled at his still damp clothes next to Killua's where he had dropped them last night. He reached out for a pair of shorts and saw Killua's sweatshirt on the top of his clothes. He grabbed it and brought it close to his face; it smelled like Killua. He put it on and walked up to the deck.

The floor was still damp under his feet but the rain had stopped. He saw Killua standing looking out to at the sea with his hands in his pockets; he wasn't wearing a shirt. As he walked towards him, Gon noticed the ship was being surrounded with a light fog that came up close to the edge of the ship. Gon slid his arms around the space that was left between Killua's arms and his side and hugged him from behind; he rested his chin on his shoulder. Gon fell Killua tilt his head to the side to rest his cheek closer to him. Gon smiled feeling warmer already.

"What you looking at?" Gon asked Killua.

"I woke up this morning because of the cold so I came outside and saw this tiny bit of fog around the boat. It's been about an hour since then and the fog is up to the edge of the boat" Killua said still looking ahead, "We're heading into the fog and I can't see it but I think the island might be that way" Killua said pointing ahead of them. He brought his arms back and placed it over Gon's. "Can you see anything?" Killua asked him and Gon could tell he was looking at him now; he knew Gon's eyesight was a bit keener than his.

"Hmm" Gon said squinting trying to force something into view; he shook his head. "I can't see land but I can tell the fog is thicker a little more to the left" He said moving one of his arms and pointing ahead. He saw Killua follow his sign his with eyes and nod.

"I think we should head that way" Killua said and Gon agreed. It was usually where things looked more eerie that power dwelled. "I have this feeling in my gut telling me to turn back" Killua said in a low voice and Gon understood looking out. Something about the atmosphere was warning them to stay back; to Gon that was only an invitation to come closer. He was excited.

Gon hugged Killua tighter and heard Killua let out a laugh.

"You can't wait to get there can you?" Killua asked knowing his friend well. Gon nodded, brushing his face to Killua's as he did.

"But I can wait a little" he said and kissed Killua's neck lightly. He was pleased to see little goose bumps form around it. "Aren't you cold?" he asked Killua feeling the cold floor under them.

"I was until you came" he said and Gon felt himself blush, "You know because you're hugging me and the body temperature and stuff" Killua explained also noticing how forward that had sounded. Gon smiled to himself; he hugged Killua a little tighter and kissed his neck again.

"Good" he said to him. Gon hadn't had the time think how thing were going to work now that all these new things were incorporated into their relationship but he was liking it so far. He really liked being able to hug Killua again and more so, he liked being able to hold him as close as he'd always wanted to. Gon kissed Killua's neck again and though he really liked that too. The only kisses he had ever given were to Mito-san and it was completely different from these. Every time he closed his lips on Killua's neck he felt warm and happy but most of all he felt it brought them closer together; sharing something that only he got to do with Killua. Gon kissed his soft skin once more and this time Killua turned around in his arms and wrapped his around Gon's neck.

"You're wearing my sweatshirt" Killua said looking down at him and smiling.

"I'm sorry I just saw it there and it was cold and" Gon said feeling a little embarrassed now that Killua pointed it out. He felt Killua lean his forehead on his.

"Don't be" Killua said, closing his arms tighter on Gon's neck, "It looks better on you" he said and leaned in and kissed his lips softly. Gon felt his heart beat picking up pace again. What was it about Killua that made him react this way just by moving closer to him? Now all he could think about was having Killua close to him. When Killua moved from his lips and started to lose his grip around his neck a bit, Gon moved his hands to the side of his face and pulled him back kissing him. Gon slowly moved from him trying to calm himself a little. Pulling Killua towards him had made his body want to jump on top of him.

"I like that" Killua said waking up Gon from his thoughts. Gon looked at him.

"What?" Gon asked him.

"You kissing me" Killua said; Gon felt a blush creep on his cheeks and looked down. Killua moved closer and made Gon move his face back up with his nose. "You like it right?" Killua asked him and Gon nodded slowly, "Then don't stop" Killua said to him and Gon felt a smile forming on his lips. He kissed Killua again and thought he really enjoyed the changes in their relationship and was really looking forward to keep on exploring it. Last night had been the most amazing night of his life. Never in a million years had Gon imagined his body could be able to feel the way he did when he was inside Killua. The very thought of it made him hungry for more. He kissed Killua deeply and thought he just might be up for that exploring right now.

* * *

Netero stood looking at the unlikely pair standing in front of him. He hadn't seen Hisoka since the hunter exam and was very surprised to see him now with Kurapica on his side. He could tell Hisoka was still itching to fight him from the way his aura was struggling to stay close to his body. Netero would never dream of having this conversation with him, but Kurapica's rightful concern was leaning him towards the truth.

"Please Netero-san. I need to know what I'm up against reaching that island" Kurapica begged him. Netero sighed.

"I've told you I don't know what his ability is" Netero said still struggling with the idea of coming clean.

"A little birdy once mentioned to me that you used to have an old childhood friend before he decided to seclude himself on an island" Hisoka said in the same oily way he remembered. Netero felt a slight shock to Hisoka's words; how could he have known?

"You know the elder. You must have some idea of what the ability is. It will be something related to his personality, something you can surely deduce if you knew him for such a long time" Kurapica said and Netero felt cornered al of a sudden.

"Chrollo is after it" Hisoka said with a soft sing-song voice, "He will find him" he warned. Netero knew what was at stake. The idea of the phantom troupe getting their hands on him; not even Kurapica would be able to stand up to them. He looked at the pair and saw the desperation in the blonde's face. He knew it wasn't only about what might happen; it was about the boys. Kurapica needed to be prepared in case he might fight have to fight them with a new ability. Netero felt sorry for him; if he told them what his suspicions were Kurapica had no way of preparing for it. He sighed making up his mind.

"Drapan was always a very sickly child, always in bed looking out the window dreaming" he started and saw the pair react, "I was a very energetic boy, always looking for adventure. Somehow we became very good friends so naturally when I learned Nen I taught him all I knew. I left his side for barely a month and when I came back I was very surprised to see him not only up from that bed but thriving. He had become the leader of the whole town. He helped anybody who was sick or weak" Netero said and paused to look out the window of his office. "He wasn't a fighter, he never cared much for harming other people in any way" he said and looked at the pair again. Netero could see the slight confusion in their faces. No, it's not a fighting skill, but it was much more dangerous if fallen to the wrong hands.

"What was his nature?" Kurapica asked. Netero thought about that, he wasn't completely sure.

"I can only assume from what I know, that Drapan is a specialist" he said confessing his own suspicions. He saw Kurapica looking frustrated, it was much harder to deduce someone's ability if he was a specialist. It could be anything, but he wasn't a fighter and Netero knew that his friend only had one desire in his heart. He wanted everyone to be strong; maybe too strong. "I think that his ability might be too use his nen to open someone's aura entirely turning them into specialist" he said and saw the expected reaction from both of them. Both of their eyes widened but he saw fear in Kurapica's and excitement in Hisoka's.

"He can turn people into specialist? How is that even possible?" Kurapica asked and Netero could hear the dread in his voice. Netero had wondered about that many a times.

"I believe it might be conditioned with some kind special circumstance but I'm not sure. Again these are only my theories, I do not know for certain that this is in fact his ability" Netero warned them.

"But it makes sense" Kurapica said resigned, Hisoka nodded with a small smile in his face.

"The entire phantom troupe with a hundred percent in all aspects, that might prove trickier than we thought" Hisoka said though his voice was not of concern for the consequences. Kurapica looked like he had lost the battle already. There was no way to prepare for that fight all he could do now was reach that God forsaken island before it was too late. Netero hoped Kurapica made it in time; he trusted the boys but this might be too much for them to handle on their own.

* * *

Killua smiled to himself feeling Gon's bare skin next to his again. He ran his fingers over his chest feeling them warm at the touch. He saw Gon's flushed face, trying to catch his breath again. His eyes were closed and Killua thought that he looked absolutely perfect. He moved his hand and stroked the side of Gon's face. Gon opened his eyes and smiled at him; Killua could only smile back. He pulled him closer by his neck and kissed him. Gon's lips felt so warm against his; Killua still couldn't believe he could just do that whenever he felt like it. He moved and dug his face in Gon's neck; his skin was moist with his sweat. Killua felt Gon put his arm around him and pull him closer.

"I don't think I'll ever get tired of that" Killua heard Gon say and he couldn't help but let out a laugh.

"Me neither" Killua said back to him. Having Gon's body moving over his was just about the best thing he could think of. He was still shocked that everything came so naturally to Gon; he needed little no guidance from Killua. He had this natural curiosity and such confidence that he just did whatever he wanted with Killua and that was just fine by him. "Let's never stop" Killua whispered.

"Okay" Gon said and Killua felt him move and kiss him again. Killua smiled to his lips.

"I didn't mean right now" Killua said but still kissed him again. It was unbelievable how happy he was right in this moment. He started to run his hand over Gon's abs when he felt the ship slow down. They stopped kissing and looked at each other. _What the hell was that?_

Killua jumped from the bed and grabbed something to wear on his way up to the deck. He saw the thick fog all around him. What had slowed the ship down so much? He walked around and saw Gon come outside in his underwear. He smiled at him.

"That's distracting" he said, Gon smiled blushing and started to walk around the ship looking for anything that could explain this.

"It's colder" Gon said to himself. Killua saw him look out into the fog and walked over to him looking in the same direction. Killua still couldn't make out anything through the mist but he could tell Gon could. "Killua there it is" he said and Killua tried to look further. Suddenly he saw a soft dark silhouette in the middle of the whiteness. He felt his mouth drop when he realized it wasn't one shape but about ten of them. He looked sideways at Gon who was looking at him. He felt the tiny hairs all over his body stand up as the feeling to turn back got stronger.

"Gon" he said looking back out at the slowly growing outlines.

"We're here" Gon said in a scarcely audible voice. They had finally reached Pandora.

* * *

**Disclaimer : I do not own HunterxHunter.**

**Side Note : Hi readers! Sorry it took me a little longer to upload this one! Still I hope you liked this one and are looking forward to the next chapter when more things start to make sense. I'm sorry if couldn't explain the whole Nen thing more clearly but I do plan on doing more research just to keep it true to the original HxH. **

**Thanks to all new reviewers for letting me know what you think of the story so far I truly hope this story will live up to your expectations. XD To my faithful reviewers thank you for sticking with the Pandora!**

**I was really nervous about the last chapter since it was pretty much the one that inspired me to write this whole thing so thank you for all your kind words!**


	14. Wrong Move

Chapter Thirteen – Wrong Move

Machi stood on the edge of a cliff looking out at the sea. They had been walking around the island for three days and the still weren't sure where to go. For a moment looking out she thought she'd seen something and had stopped midsentence.

"Machi?" Nobunaga asked trying to get her attention again. She looked back at him with her same cold stare.

"It's nothing. I was saying that that last man we ran into said we should head south from here, but I don't trust it" she said refocusing in the conversation.

"Was he real?" Nobunaga asked. Machi didn't know for sure. The island worked in such a way that made it impossible to distinguish between reality or trick. It made no sense to her that someone would give her directions if he was a fake, but it made her second guess herself when she thought about reverse phycology. The sharp instincts she usually relied on were growing increasingly weak. She clicked her tongue in disgust; she really hated this island.

"I don't know" she said simply and saw Nobunaga sigh and look around him. Phinks, Franklin, Kalluto and Chrollo stood not too far away from them discussing the same things. Machi was glad she'd gotten Chrollo to come along with them, since he just might have to steal that ability in order for them to get out of the island.

"I still think we should split up" Phinks said, his frustration palpable.

"I've told you a million times that it'll only make it harder. We need to confuse the island so that we can figure out its path" Kalluto said; his usual cold and composed presence shaken.

"I believe we might have come to that now" Chrollo said. Machi and Nobunaga moved closer to listen in on the conversation. "We can divide in two groups so it might still be safe" he said looking out at the sea contemplating his plan. "One group can look for other people on the island and the others can look for a path towards the mountain" Machi looked at him and nodded. It might be the best plan. They had been stuck on one side of the island and they could see the mountains on the other side still they had found no path for them to cross. Every time they got near to it, they would simply be transported back to the place where they had set port.

"I'll look for others" Nobunaga said itching to see some blood to relieve him of his frustration.

"I'll go with Nobunaga" Machi said and Nobunaga nodded at her.

"Me too" Franklin said.

"So that means Phinks, Kalluto and I will continue the search" Chrollo said and without another word turned his back and started to walk away from them. Kalluto and Phinks followed glaring at each other. Machi looked at Nobunaga; she felt safer with Franklin at her side. She had a feeling that Nobunaga might endanger her on the island; she couldn't explain it but she felt it was true.

* * *

Gon and Killua saw the cluster of islands from the deck of their ship. Killua hadn't been able to feel relaxed ever since it had come into their view the previous night; now that they were only a few miles away, probably another hour on the ship, he was ready to run. He looked sideways at Gon and couldn't help but smile at the difference in their reactions. To Gon, warning signs had always meant and invitation; he stood looking with a smile forcing its way out of his focused stare.

"Which one do you think?" Killua asked referring to the islands. Without hesitating, Gon pointed out at the most simple looking one. Killua looked at it and agreed.

"All of the other islands are releasing a small amount of aura, that one is the only one that isn't" Gon said. He was right; if anybody sailed to this area they would be drawn to any of the others and would probably over look this one. "It's like the whole island is practicing zetsu" Gon continued.

"I think we should follow its example" Killua said and Gon turned to look at him. "If the troupe is already here they might sense us if we get any closer without it" Killua said and Gon nodded. They both closed their eyes and focused on bringing their auras inside their bodies, concealing their presence entirely.

An hour later the pair stood with their feet firmly planted on the ground of Pandora.

* * *

"Gon stop it" Killua said halfheartedly letting out a laugh and pushing Gon away from him. Killua had been counting their rapidly decreasing provisions when Gon had moved closer to him without him noticing and proceeded to kiss his neck in a more than suggestive way. He knew that zetsu was necessary for them to remain alive but those surprise lust attacks from Gon were just about to make him go crazy. Before they had even reached the island, he and Gon had decided that they would keep their hands off each other during their time here so they could remain focused. Over a week had passed and if Killua thought it was a difficult goal back then, he was definitively having his doubts now. Somehow, since they had stepped on the island all Killua could think about was touching Gon. It was almost as if the island itself was multiplying his desires.

Killua looked at Gon's frustrated face, sitting down a little further away and looking to his left, and knew he was probably going through the same thing. Still, Killua knew that it was undoubtedly for the best. Ever since they had reached Pandora more and more strange things seemed to happen as they got deeper into the island. Sometimes Killua would stop only to realize that they were walking towards the shore again or would look for Gon desperately and then feel him touch his shoulder with a confused expression on his face. The truth was they had no idea what they were doing or where they were going; but Killua had the slight suspicion that Kurapica hadn't been wrong in his drunken assumptions. This place was trying to mess with their heads.

"I can't tell where we're going" Gon said and pointed at a tree in front of him. Killua's heart sank as he looked at it.

"You've got to be kidding me" Killua said feeling himself get more and more frustrated. They had marked that tree an hour ago and had been walking in a straight line in the opposite direction.

"This doesn't even look like the place that tree was on. In fact it doesn't even look like the same tree!" Gon said opening his eyes a little wider and letting out an exasperated sigh. Killua looked at it and nodded. The confusion of the place and the added fact of them not being able to freely use their nen, was really taking a toll on them. Killua heard Gon let out a groan.

"Why is it that I'm not supposed to touch you?" Gon asked him and Killua saw a wicked grin growing slowly on his tanned face. He let out a laugh and looked back at their things; they needed to pick up their hunting if they wanted to survive.

"The brigade is around and we don't want to be caught off guard" Killua repeated for the millionth time; still he couldn't erase the smile off his face. Killua packed up all their things and saw from the corner of his eye Gon getting into all fours like an animal and slowly walking towards him; he looked like a predator about to catch his prey. "Gon, I'm serious, stop it" Killua said and got up from the floor. He looked down; the hunger in his eyes made him second guess himself. _What are the odds of running into the troupe right now?_ Killua shook his head and walked away from him; he really had to try and summon some sort of control, since Gon had clearly thrown his out the window.

Killua looked at the damn tree and knew they were lost again; he had no idea which way they had to walk to move closer to the heart of the island rather than to the shore. Without warning, Gon pushed Killua pinning him to the tree and pressing his whole body against him. _Damn zetsu_.

"You have no intention of taking me seriously, do you?" Killua asked the tanned boy as he felt his lips closer over his neck.

"Maybe if you could wipe that smile from your face" Gon said and Killua couldn't repress a laugh. Gon kissed his neck again and intertwined his fingers with his. Killua felt Gon's increasingly warm body moving against him and it was really no surprise to him that he was already hard. Killua freed one of his hands and ran it threw Gon hair and grabbed on to it.

"Maybe if you stopped looking at me like that I would" Killua said and heard himself moan when Gon used his newly freed hand to stroke Killua over his pants; he guessed wasn't surprised either at what he found.

"Shh. You don't want to be caught off guard, remember?" He heard Gon say and he could practically feel him smiling behind him, "Again" he said with a small laugh. Gon moved his hand under his shirt, caressing his skin softly and then slid it into his pants. It was probably the hardest torture he had endured yet; to manage to stay perfectly silent as Gon stroked him firmly up and down. He felt a slight relief when he felt his hand let go of him and move out of his pants but it was only replaced by utter shock of Gon reaching to grab his bottom instead. Killua felt Gon breathing heavily on his neck as he moved his finger in between his cheeks to find him.

"Gon" Killua said and noticed then his breathing had gotten harsher too.

"I'm not going to stop" Gon declared still running his fingers over him.

"No not that, just" Killua said and hesitated for a second, feeling slight embarrassed. Gon stopped and waited for him to continue, "Lick your fingers" Killua said in a low whisper and smiled as Gon moved his hand rapidly from his pants, following his orders. He saw Gon's hand move to his face and lick his fingers slowly.

"Like that?" Gon asked him; Killua felt his words close against his neck. He grabbed Gon's hand and placed his fingers inside his mouth. He heard a soft moan coming from Gon as he withdrew him from his mouth.

"Like that" he corrected and Gon's wet fingers lingered on his lips for a second before he decided to move his hand back in his pants. Killua closed his eyes and waited to feel Gon's fingers going inside of him; it was even harder for him to stay silent. His hands clawed into the trunk of the tree and slid down ripping some of it off. He felt Gon lifting his shirt up with his other hand and he helped him take it off completely. He disliked the roughness of Gon's shirt against his bare skin.

"Take yours off" Killua heard himself practically command Gon. Gon moved his hand and pulled it off in one quick motion. Killua smiled at the difference of his skin warming up by Gon's. He slid his hand back down and inside him; he couldn't help but clench his teeth trying to control the pleasure. Gon's other hand moved from the side of the tree to the buttons holding Killua's pants up. Killua rushed in again to help and pulled down his own pants; the urgency overcoming his gentle nature. He heard Gon undoing his own and couldn't help but smile and brace himself. A week had been way to long for him too; If Gon hadn't moved so quickly over him, given an hour, Killua would have found himself on the other side of Gon. Killua couldn't do anything but want to be with him, closer to him. Gon had taken up all the space in his mind and since they had gotten on this island his feelings had only intensified. Gon moved his hand from Killua and grabbed his hips.

"I love you" Killua heard himself whisper quickly in between breaths before he could stop himself. He wasn't even sure Gon had heard him since immediately after that he felt him going inside him. It took all the control from his torture training not to scream out at the wonderful combination of pleasure and pain going through his whole body. Killua moved his hand to the nape of Gon's neck once more and pulled him by his hair, urging him closer. Gon moved in to him over and over again, each time faster, harsher and deeper. He felt Gon's breathing growing harder too and knew that was about as much as he could take. Sure enough, Killua felt the familiar shiver of Gon's body against his and his intake of breath. Killua tried to ease his breathing as his smiled to himself.

Suddenly Killua opened his eyes wide in shock and felt Gon stay completely still against him. None of them dared to move, not believing what just happened.

"Gon" Killua le out in surprise. It had all happened so quickly; Gon had finished and just when his pleasure was about to subside he relaxed a little too much letting his aura run free. It had only been a second, Gon had noticed it and focused it back in, but it had been a second too long. Gon moved away from him and pulled his pants back up and looked at Killua in horror. Killua looked at him doing the same.

"Killua, I'm so sorry" Gon said faintly, his breathing still harsh. Killua looked at him but tried to focus on everything around him, trying to make out any difference in the environment. All he could listen to was their breathing and his own heart beating hard under his chest.

"It's okay" Killua said letting himself calm down just a bit, "No one noticed" Killua said, feeling a worried smile forming in his face. Just like that, he felt all the hairs in his body stand up and he knew what he said had been a lie. Gon and Killua both jumped backwards instinctively and prepared to fight as they looked at the people now standing in front of them; Machi, Franklin and Nobunaga. The latter stood wearing a sadistic smile on his face.

"Well, well, well" Nobunaga looked at the pair and noticed their shirts on the floor; his smile widened. "You know, I once mentioned you two reminded me of Uvogin and me, but I must say" he paused and let out a small laugh, "We were never quite that intimate" he finished and Killua felt his heart pick up even more speed. It was about to start.

* * *

**Disclaimer : I do not own HunterxHunter.**

**Side note : Hello readers! I'm sorry it took me longer to post this one but you'll be happy to know it was only to embark on a journey of deep research on HxH! The story is climbing up rather fast to the point where I need to have absolutely all my facts straight before I continue (Like Kalluto's effing gender). I hope you keep enjoying the story and will stay with me for more!**

**I changed the cover of the story BTW; I think this one works way better. I've been having my doubts whether I should leave this story as T rated or change it up to M. Let me know what you guys think about that please, since this the first story I've posted and I want it to be presented perfectly.**

**I might change the summary too... but I digress.**

**Thank you to all new and faithful reviewers! To all that haven't reviewed please let me know what you think! All your kinds words always push me to work harder and try and make the story better! XD**


	15. The Plan

Chapter Fourteen – The Plan

The grass beneath his feet was drenched with blood. Gon spat out some more and looked up at his attacker. Machi stood in front of him looking at him with the same detached look in her face; not even a glimpse of a smile of satisfaction. He tried to hold down the anger running through his veins; he couldn't lose control, he had to stick to the plan.

Gon looked sideways at Killua, pinned to a tree, much like himself, held tightly by Machi's nen. He breathed and tried to calm himself down again. Franklin had left over four hours ago looking for Chrollo and the pair had decided to inflict a little torture of their own before he arrived. Even though her expression was unchanging Gon could tell she was enjoying it thoroughly; it was as if her personality was finally coming through under all that restraint. Gon hated to admit he knew exactly how she felt.

"Once more" Machi warned in her cold voice. She lifted her hand and Gon could see the tread in her hand connecting to the one in his chest, "How did you end up in this island?" She asked and Gon looked back at her defiantly "Do you know the way to enter?" She asked him for the millionth time and Gon just stared on; a small smile stretched in his face.

"We sailed here" He said and saw the frustration creep on her face slightly. Gon felt a slight pull on the skin on his chest; her nen threads were about to tear through his skin once more. "And I still don't know what you mean. Enter where?" Gon asked and held in a scream as he felt his flesh tear painfully on his chest. He tried to hold in his pain clenching his teeth and looked sideways again at Killua. He looked back at him but he saw no change in his face. Killua was much better than him in concealing his pain or the truth and they knew it; they had hardly touched him since their capture. It had been so swift that Gon had scarcely moved from the spot from when they spotted them. He felt it against his back; the tears of Killua's finger on the wood. Gon tried to hold back a smile but then thought that would probably enrage her even further and let it out.

Machi turned her back on the little freak and looked at Nobunaga. He stood leaning against a tree looking at her slightly amused. When she looked at him in angry question he did nothing more than shrug.

"Are you planning on doing something any time soon?" She asked him. Her voice was detached but you could tell she was angry now. He shrugged again and her anger rose even more.

"Why would I? They don't know anything. They're as lost as we are" He said looking back at Killua. "Let's just wait for the others. Don't waste your energy" Nobunaga looked back at Machi and smiled at the rage on her face. _Finally, some real emotion. _She turned her back on him and looked back at the black haired boy.

"He's not wrong" Gon said and spat again at his feet leaving yet another trace of blood. Machi knew he was wrong. They must know something, it was no coincidence they had ran into these two before any other. For all they knew these were the first real people they had run into; all the others might have just been one more trick. But not them, Machi knew they held something that would help them, she just wasn't sure what it was. She clicked her tongue in disgusts and walked away from them. Nobunaga let a little laugh escape his lips as he saw her walk away from them.

"Looks like she finally gave up" He said aloud to no one in particular. He looked back at the slivered hair boy next to him and then back to Gon. He was absolutely delighted they had found them and even more ecstatic to realize they were, in all probability, real. Still, he found himself a little disappointed in the ease of their capture. He figured at this point they should have already been stronger as to resist their attacks and not let themselves be cornered so easily. _Did they do it on purpose?_ He looked sideways at the Zoldyck boy and shook his head. There was no way he was going to resist all that punishment on his little lover and not lose patience and free himself. If he could do it, he would have already. It pained Nobunaga to admit he might have been mistaken about their potential.

Another hour passed and finally Nobunaga raised his head to find some members of his family walking towards them. Machi was next to Chrollo whispering something to him; Nobunaga had not doubt she was filling him in on her suspicions before he could say otherwise. Chrollo looked at both of the boys with a light smile on his face.

"I didn't expect to find you here, but it's a pleasant surprise. Is your friend with you?" He asked them pleasantly referring to Kurapica. Gon spat back at his feet and Nobunaga couldn't control his laugher.

"They don't know anything Boss" Nobunaga said getting up from where he had been sitting and walking next to Chrollo and looking at the boys. Machi let out a little sound behind him and Nobunaga felt his temper raising. She thought she was so superior with her instincts and the trust Chrollo had in them. It was nothing tangible in her word; it was just her superior controlling nature that sometimes made her right, nothing more.

"They might" Chrollo said looking at them curiously.

"They didn't even look surprised to find us. They probably followed us here. They know something" Machi said and looked angrily at Nobunaga as he let out a condescending laugh.

"They looked pretty surprised to me! They weren't following us; they were fucking up against a tree! What the hell are they supposed to know?" Nobunaga said and Chrollo looked from Machi to the boys; they were both blushing furiously at Nobunaga's last words.

"Can't say I'm surprised" Chrollo said dismissively and started to walk away from them. "We don't need them anyway, we found a way. Kalluto and Phinks are waiting for us to go back" He said dismissively, "Nobunaga you can keep them if you want or kill them" Chrollo paused for a second and waited for his answer.

"We'll bring them along" Nobunaga said without hesitation and looked at Machi's angry face, "If they do know something you can keep on questioning them, or maybe the Chain user just might come to save them" he said and this seemed to satisfy her slightly.

"Good, then let's proceed shall we?" Chrollo said with a smile and turned to guide them to the others. Gon took advantage of that second where everybody was looking away from them and turned slightly to look at Killua. Their eyes met and they exchanged a small smile before looking away ready to be moved from the tree to wherever Chrollo was taking them.

* * *

Chrollo looked at the cliff in front of him and smiled; he looked back at the confused faces of the rest of his companions. He opened his arms and smiled at them. They had been looking at that same cliff so many times, thinking they were close to someone but never realizing they were close to something. It was a bridge, only they couldn't see it, not even with gyo. All they could see was the sea ahead of them and nothing more. Chrollo explained this to his companions trying his best not to reveal too much information close to the two younger boys. Chrollo was not stupid, he knew those two were up to something, but now it was up to Nobunaga to decide what he would do with them. All Chrollo could do was prepare for the aftermath in case something went wrong.

"Can we all go?" Machi asked looking at him. Chrollo nodded back.

"But we won't" Chrollo said and they all looked at him, "Phinks, Kalluto, Franklin and me will go first. Machi and Nobunaga, you can stay with those two and cross when you have a better handle on them" Chrollo said hoping Nobunaga might correct his mistakes before then. Machi and Nobunaga agreed slowly looking back at the two boys; both of them appeared not to be listening to them looking down at their feet with their eyes closed.

An hour passed by and Kalluto warned he felt it coming close now. The first four got up and stood at the edge of the cliff. Machi looked at them intently and saw that Nobunaga and the brats were doing the same. For a while it seemed like nothing was happening and then with a slight change of the breeze they were gone. They had all blasted off quickly leaving a slight dent on the edge of the cliff from the force they used to push off. It had to be a long way ahead and they probably only had a second or two to get there. Machi had felt something a week ago; it had to be a week from now. She looked at Nobunaga and knew he understood. If he didn't let go of them by them; she'd kill them herself.

* * *

Killua hummed to himself while Machi withdrew her tread painfully from him, pulling his skin with her. She looked at him completely enraged; her cold, controlled front was completely wrecked now. Killua couldn't help but feel satisfied with the progress they had made in the past six days. Gon and him had silently agreed to take care of one of them; Killua chose Machi and was very close to reaching his objective. He was glad to see Gon was keeping up the good work too.

He looked back at his prey and slightly adjusted his back to the tree he was pinned to; he was starting to grow tired of the uncomfortable position. Still he felt himself ready to go at any chance; while his muscles might have been a little sore, he was still perfectly capable of running off if released. He looked at his tanned friend and was glad to see him healing nicely. It had taken a toll on him, watching idly as that bitch kept ripping his perfect skin over and over again. Killua was scared she might scar him; he smiled at the silliness of his thought and looked back angry girl in front of him. She had seen him smile while looking at Gon; a small smile spread through her face. Shit.

"You think you're going to walk out of this alive don't you?" she said whispering close to him so only he could hear her. Nobunaga sat next to Gon a few steps away but he noticed they showed no reaction to her words, "Maybe you will, but you little friend" she paused and looked at Gon, "He's too proud to run, he'll fight us and he'll die" She finished and walked away from him. No, that wouldn't happen. Gon knew what they were supposed to do and he wouldn't just risk his life stupidly. He looked at Gon's angry, determined face and felt a slight panic raise in his chest. They didn't have much time and he couldn't risk Gon dying. Killua made up his mind.

Some hours passed before Killua noticed a change in their captors; Machi and Nobunaga had gone through the trouble to walk further from them closer to the cliff. Where they going to leave without them? No, they wouldn't leave them here unless they were dead. He looked at Gon and saw him smiling back at him. They just need to be a little more patient; he smiled back.

"Well boys, it's time for you two to decide and stop staring at each other's eyes" Nobunaga said before they could look away from each other. Killua looked at him walking closer to Gon; his hand grabbing his sword. Killua could feel his heart beat steadily raising and willed it to slow down.

"We're not joining" Gon said firmly.

"I don't care personally if you join or not, so can we just kill them?" Machi said but Killua could tell she was more relaxed than before. Did they have a plan?

"How about I propose a trade?" Nobunaga said walking closer to Gon; Killua forced his blood to stop boiling. "If you join" he started and looked at him. Killua noticed Machi close to him looking down at him with a smile in her face. He looked down at his chest and saw a thread creeping from his skin to her hand; he felt it around his heart, "We won't kill him. We'll just let him go" Nobunaga finished simply. Gon looked at the thread and his face paled; _Gon don't be stupid._ Killua saw Nobunaga reach out and place a hand on Gon's shoulder. He couldn't control the anger; all of his emotions were as sensible as an exposed nerve, only the slightest touch and a reaction occurred.

"GET YOUR FUCKING HANDS OF HIM!" He heard himself scream before he could help it; there it was the exposed nerve. He saw Gon's shocked face looking back at him and heard the Nobunaga's laugher ringing in his ears. It was now or never; he couldn't hold back anymore. He saw Gon and knew he understood.

"Hey Nobunaga!" Gon called out regaining his attention, Nobunaga turned to look at Gon and Killua unleashed his Nen before Machi got a chance to react. Machi fell to the floor before she could even realize what had happened to her; Killua released his energy using her thread as a catalyst. The shock sent her flying, crashing into a nearby tree. Killua pushed himself from the tree feeling the threads holding him cutting through his skin. He looked sideways and saw Gon free himself and use his Jajanken paper to push Nobunaga from him and pin him to a tree. Killua pulled his yoyos from his pockets and threw them to capture a surprised Nobunaga and once again let his electricity run though his own strings. He jumped closer and saw Gon jump towards Machi. He stood in front of Nobunaga and heard him laugh.

"For a moment there I thought you kids were useless!" he said still laughing looking at Killua. Killua felt the blood boiling under his skin and his body tremble with the loss of control. Killua placed his hand on Nobunaga's chest; the tips of his fingers scarcely touching his skin. The energy he had freed was enough to kill a normal man a thousand times over; but he knew it was only enough to momentarily paralyze his enemy. He closed his eyes and focused his energy; he felt a great pleasure as he heard Nobunaga's scream fill the space around him. He opened his eyes again and felt a smile on his lips.

"What do you think now?" Killua asked him. Nobunaga was no longer laughing; he could barely breath. Killua felt his hand change its shape and he concentrated on covering it with Nen to a hundred percent. "Now that I have your life in my hands?" Killua asked and felt the smile widen on his face; he now saw some fear in his enemy's face.

"KILLUA!" Gon screamed and he turned to look at him. Machi was on the floor next to his feet and he was looking at him horrified. Killua didn't care; he was not going to let them hurt Gon. If he had to kill them all and turn into a monster in his eyes, he wouldn't care, Gon would be alive. He felt the warmness of Nobunaga's heart on his hand; still trying to pump blood to his body.

"I'm sorry" Killua whispered towards Gon and pulled his heart out. He heard the cry of pain and turned to see the light leave Nobunaga's eyes; he's dead. Killua felt his body trembling with the power that ran through it. He had done it; he killed one of the original members of the phantom brigade. He looked down at his hand; covered in blood and his heart slightly twitching in it. He let it fall to the ground and turned back to look at Gon; more specifically at Machi. One down, one to go.

Machi raised herself and Killua saw her threads surround Gon's body. He walked slowly towards them; he pulled his yoyos back from Nobunaga and heard the soft thump of his limp body falling to the ground. Gon looked at Machi with a confident look in his face.

"Don't move any closer" Machi said looking sideways at the cliff fort a second. Gon met his eyes and Killua understood. It was almost time.

"NOW KILLUA!" Gon screamed stretching his arms towards him. Killua wrapped his yoyos around Gon's arms; he felt a great satisfaction seeing Machi showing more emotions, fear and confusion.

"Don't do anything or I'll kill him!" She said still trying to bargain.

"Don't you understand?" Gon asked moving his body to prepare for impact, "You never had the upper hand" he said with a smile and looked at Killua, "NOW!" he screamed and Killua focused all of the energy he could muster and released it towards Gon through his yoyos. Gon screamed as it reached him and he re focused it and lent some of his own strength to send it towards Machi before she could react and pull her threads from him.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" Gon's scream rang through island, stronger than Machi's and stronger than Nobunga's had been. His fists were clenched and his face was distorted into something in between pain and rage and bliss. Killua eased his nen and ran to Gon as he fell to his knees. Machi was laying unconscious on the ground; her heart was hardly beating.

"Gon!" Killua said catching him. Gon was breathing hard under his grip. They had practiced this before many times but Killua had never sent all of it through Gon. It had only been possible because of Machi's nen ability and her current connection to Gon's body. Gon looked up at him with a slight smile on his face.

"You're too strong Killu" Gon said trying to stand up, "I didn't know it would be that hard with two yoyos" Gon confessed with a small laugh. He gathered himself and look towards the cliff but Killua was looking down at Machi's limp body. His heart started to beat hard on his chest again and he felt his hand changing. "We have to leave now, I think I can feel it" Killua heard Gon say still looking at the cliff.

"Just one second" He said in whisper and started to lean closer to her body. He felt Gon clasp his hand in his; Killua turned to look at Gon.

"We have to go now!" he said sternly.

"Gon! She'll come after us! We have to do it now!" Killua said franticly back to Gon. He needed to kill her; it was the only way. He needed to feel it again too; Killua wanted to feel the power.

"Killu" Gon said softly and Killua felt as though he had slapped him across the face to make him react. Killua felt his heart calming down and nodded towards Gon; he was right they had to leave right now. They walked to the cliff and braced themselves. "Ready?" Gon asked and turned to face Killua and smile. Killua returned the smile; he felt Gon close his hand in his and he held it tightly. This was their chance; this was their plan. He couldn't deviate from it. Killua bent his knees and felt something coming closer to them; all he could see was the sea ahead but he felt there was something out there. Then without warning he saw it; an island was staring him in the face and there was a platform they could jump to reach it, but it was moving.

"NOW!" he heard himself yell and they both pushed off at the same time. Just like that they were flying through fog and he could see the platform with in reaching distance. He heard Gon's laugh and he felt a smile starting to form on his lips when something snapped behind him. It sounded like thread; Killua felt his head far from his body and then all turned into black nothingness.

* * *

**Disclaimer : I do not own HunterxHunter.**

**Side Note : Hello readers! I'm sorry it's taken me so long to post something, but my classes just started AND now I finally have a job so... I might only be able to post a chapter (or two on a good week) from now on :(. Please bare with me and stay tuned for more. Let me know what you think about this chapter! I'm sorry I left you with this cliff hanger BUT I'll clear everything up in the next one! XD**

**I'll never tier of writing thanks to all of you out there reading and reviewing my story! It really helps my ADD from from drifting me off to another one and leaving this one unfinished. I promise I'll be back soon! **


	16. Grief-stricken

Chapter Fifteen - Grief-stricken

Gon felt like he was flying through the air. They had done it! Killua was right about the troupe underestimating them. At some point they would have an opening and they might be able to win with the element of surprise. But this was so much better than that! They had been able to subdue them with their strength. Gon couldn't help but let out a laugh of pure joy as he flew right into the island. Then, all the hairs in his body stood; something was wrong. He felt the grip on his hand lessen and he couldn't feel Killua's aura anymore. He clasped his hand tighter around Killua and with the sudden change, Gon lost his balance and they crashed into the land before them.

Gon felt his body bouncing roughly on the ground but he held on to Killua's hand. When they finally stopped, he felt the pain going all over his body. His heart was beating hard in panic. He opened his eyes to look at his hand; he saw his fingers holding on to Killua's but his were lifeless. _Lifeless_.

"Killu" Gon coughed. He tasted blood in his mouth and spat it out. He managed to pull Killua towards him as he crawled to him. Killua's body felt limp at his effort; Gon started to feel like he was short of breath. "Killua" he said a little louder; he sat up to look at his face. All the air escaped Gon's lungs; Killua's eyes were open and they looked empty. Gon heard his heart beating in his ears, the sound was so deafening he couldn't focus on Killua's. Did he even have one? Gon moved his hand to his chest and he saw it shake as he placed it over it. He couldn't feel it; where was Killua's heart beat? "Killua!" he heard his voice much louder this time. He had to wake up. Gon shook him but his body only swung with a sick limp look. He shook him a bit harder and his head just bobbed from the front to the back and his eyes stayed open looking ahead. Killua's body was shaking but Gon was sure it had to be his own hold on him.

"No" Gon said out loud as a dark thought invaded his mind. "Don't be dead" Gon whispered and he saw one of his tears fall on Killua's white cheek. "Please don't be dead" Gon said, breathing it painfully. He reached his hand to Killua's face and felt it so cold to the touch, much colder than usual. "No Killu, please wake up" he said again his voice breaking; his tears were falling freely down his face now. _Killua you're mine_, Gon said to him, _you're not allowed to die until I say so. _A sob escaped his lips; his heartbeat was so loud on his ears. Gon felt like he might have been screaming Killua's name but he didn't care; all he could do was claps him tightly in his arms. His world had stopped, it was nothing now. He didn't exist; he just couldn't keep existing in a world where Killua didn't. He tried to breath but his lungs didn't want to respond. He sucked in air painfully in between sobs; he couldn't see anything either. Gon wasn't even sure he was crying but his vision was so blurred that he just assumed he must have been.

He felt Killua in his arms. He was there, he was right there! It just didn't make any sense. He was just fine a second ago. Killua was not dead! He still felt like him, all cold and silky like he usually did. He even smelled like him, even with all the blood. _Blood_. Gon raised his hand to his face and saw it covered in blood; Killua's blood. Another huge pang of pain crushed his chest. He couldn't breathe anymore.

Gon wasn't sure if it had been a second or a month since they had crashed and he had been holding Killua; all he felt was his body growing colder and the incessant sound of his heart in his ears. It hammered in his head and he couldn't make out anything around him. He heard maybe water close by and rocks falling. Somewhere in between that he heard someone calling his name; he had to hear it several times between heart beats to process it. He moved and looked at Killua hopefully but all he saw were Killua's dead eyes looking back at him. Another huge pang on his chest; he hugged Killua tightly. He heard his name again but it felt like it was far away. He didn't care. Nothing mattered anymore; if it wasn't Killua he didn't care who called him or who came.

"Gon!" He heard again, this time much closer. He closed his arms tightly around Killua. "Gon!" _he's right besides us, but it doesn't matter_. "Gon what happened?" he thought he heard something familiar in the voice. He felt some one pull on him slightly and he closed his arms tighter on Killua. Gon felt the hand letting go and the person moving around him. Then he felt a pair of hands touch his face and force him to look ahead. Gon blinked and he knew he was still sobbing but he saw a familiar outline in front of him, thought it took him a while to understand and even longer to let the words escape his lips.

"Ku-Kurapica?" Gon said, his voice trembling. The person in front of him nodded and said something but he couldn't understand him.

"Gon! Let go of him! Let go of Killua!" Kurapica said in a panicked voice but Gon only grew more frantic at the request. No! He wouldn't ever let go of him! He pulled him closer and buried his face next to Killua's. "Gon! I can help, but you have to let go of him" Gon heard but he still wouldn't let go. "Help me!" he heard Kurapica say but he got the feeling he wasn't talking to him. Then Gon felt a second pair of hands pulling on him.

"No!" he screamed as he felt Kurapica, and whoever was behind him, pulling them apart. He pulled Killua but he felt him slip his grip. He felt his whole body still shaking and he thrashed and tried to hit the person pulling him.

"Stay still little one" Gon heard a sing song voice behind him call and the calmness in his voice only made him more frantic. He felt the person's strong arms go around his neck and he felt like he was growing short of oxygen. He looked ahead and saw Kurapica doing something to Killua.

"Leave him alone!" He screamed; his over protectiveness was in over drive. He saw something coming from Kurapica's hand and wrap itself around Killua's body. He kept on thrashing but he felt his head growing foggier and foggier as the person behind him held him firmly; breathing was nearing impossible by now.

"We have to get them out of here" he heard Kurapica say and he looked at the person behind him. Gon looked at Killua once more; his body was still limp only now his neck was completely hidden under Kurapica's chains. He wanted to scream at them to stop but Killua started to blur even more and he felt himself faint.

* * *

Gon opened his eyes violently and looked around him. _Where am I? _He appeared to be in a room but it was something like an abandoned building or a house. The walls and the floor were made from the same rough, grey material and there were no windows or doors, only holes on the walls. He sat up and looked at his hands; they were smooth under the dry blood. You couldn't see a scratch and he couldn't feel anything hurting him. He stood up slowly from the floor and felt his body shaking; his heart felt heavy and he started to think.

"Killua" he let out and felt the raucousness of his voice. How long had he been asleep? Where was Killua? He looked down at his body; his shirt was missing but he still had his pants. _That's right; I lost my shirt before the troupe found us. _He studied his pants and felt them hard against his skin; the dried blood covering them was making them stiff and rough. He swallowed as the memories came flooding in his mind faster than he could handle. He rested his hand where the frame of the door should have been; his fingers tried to dig into the hard cement as he tried to hold on to something, anything. Killua's dead. "No" he heard himself say and he pushed himself out of the room leaving a tear on the wall where his hand had rested seconds before.

Gon walked a long hallway and heard noises coming from a room up ahead. Was this another trick? He thought he remembered Kurapica but that made no sense. He was miles away from here and he didn't know about the troupe. Gon swallowed hard again. Yes, it had to be another trick. Kurapica, his chains, Killua dead; it was the only explanation. He walked faster now convinced that he might find Killua in the other room; he'd turn around and complain about Gon sleeping through everything. He walked faster. He looked inside the room and he did find Killua but he was laying on the floor; he looked dead. Gon felt his heart drop to his feet and his body began to shake again.

"Gon" he heard and turned to look at Kurapica sitting on the corner. Gon looked at him unblinking unable to make a sound. It hadn't been a trick then; this was all true. He moved slowly towards Killua and stood looking down at his body. This couldn't be happening. "He's not dead" Gon heard Kurapica say and widened his eyes as he turned to look at him; a small light of hope burned in his chest.

"No?" he asked softly and felt like his voice might start to break. Kurapica shook his head but Gon noticed he didn't look too happy either. He didn't care, if Killua was still alive. He knelt and grabbed Killua's hand; it was so cold.

"Gon he's not dead. You crossed the bridge and we were waiting for you so when I saw you crash I went over and managed to heal him before his pulse disappeared completely" Kurapica said and Gon looked at him, waiting for him to continue.

"But" Gon said knowing something was causing Kurapica's face.

"But there was only so much I could do. Something snapped his neck; his spine. I could mended it with nen but" he stopped and looked down at Killua's body. _But he didn't wake up_, Gon finished in his head. His heart started to feel heavy in his chest again.

"But he might wake up?" Gon asked and saw Kurapica's startled reaction and knew his face must have looked frantic. He nodded slowly.

"It's not likely" Kurapica said but seeing Gon expression had scared him, "We'll wait and see if he does. He's breathing and everything else is normal" he said and Gon nodded looking at Killua's face. He reached out and grabbed his hand and wove his fingers into his; the coldness made Gon shiver in fear. He might still wake up; he would wait for as long as it took. He wouldn't give up con Killua. "It's been two days" Kurapica said and Gon looked at him alarmed. Two days? Had he slept for that long? His body must have been exhausted from their time captive. Machi's face flashed in his mind and his grieve started to turn into anger.

"She did it" he said and Kurapica looked at him confused. "Killua was right, I should have let him kill her" Gon said and heard an unfamiliar savagery in his own voice. He thought about her and everything in his mind went red, "No" he corrected, "I should have killed her".

"Machi?" Kurapica asked and Gon didn't even bother ask how he knew who he was talking about. Gon nodded but not to Kurapica's statement but to his own resolution.

"I will kill her" He said and stroked Killua's hand clasped in his with his other hand. Gon would see her suffer for this. He had never felt hatred before in such a pure form. She had stolen something precious from him and he would make her pay with her own life. Gon jumped at the feel of Kurapica's touch in his shoulder, distracting him from his thoughts. He felt him pull back his hand in response.

"Gon you should rest too" Kurapica said looking at Gon with a concerned face. Gon nodded and slid next to Killua and tried to warm his body with his; maybe that would help. Gon noticed Kurapica looking at him and it seemed like he wanted to say something but then he just slipped out of the room. _That's right, _Gon though aggressively, _Killua's mine. Just leave us alone. _He wrapped his arm tighter around him and held him close.

* * *

A few days had past and Kurapica rested his back against the wall looking at Gon clasping one of Killua's hands in his. Kurapica could hear the frantic muttering coming from him as he rocked back and forth; his forehead leaning on his hands. He could hear everything Gon was asking of Killua and the world around him and he felt his heart sick with worry. Kurapica was worried about Killua, but somehow he found himself even more worried about Gon. He had barely slept in the two days that had past and refused anything Kurapica offered him to eat. Gon only stayed in the room next to Killua, muttering, asking Killua to wake up over and over again. Kurapica could see the dark circles growing more pronounced on his face and his hands never stopped shaking. Yes, he was way more worried about Gon. Even if Killua woke up, he was sure Gon would never go back to being himself.

He heard Gon promise more than once that he would kill Machi; describing over and over again how he would do it. Gon was scaring him. Kurapica let out a sigh and walked from the room, leaving Gon to his muttering. He walked down the stairs of the abandoned building. What was he supposed to do? He couldn't think of anything he could do to help either of them. He tried his chains on Killua's neck again and in his head hoping for something, but nothing changed. He tried to talk to Gon and comfort him but it only made him tense and cause his mumbling to become all that more frantic.

He walked to a far room on the first floor that was missing a wall and saw his companion sitting on the floor. Not a care in the world, just playing with his damn cards. Hisoka turned to look at him as he walked into the room. Kurapica let his body slide down one of the walls and he sat and looked out at the rest of the abandoned town.

"No change?" Hisoka asked and Kurapica shook his head, "What a shame" Hisoka whispered and went back to his cards. Kurapica looked at him with one of his eyebrows raised, obviously unwilling to believe he cared at all about them. Hisoka looked back at his face and an eerie smile spread on his face. "Killua Zoldyck must have been already ripe for battle" he explained and Kurapica sighed thinking he should have known better, "And little Gon has gone so crazy I doubt he'll be able to use his nen ever again" Hisoka said with his soft sing song voice stacking his cards. All of them fell to the ground as a chain swiftly tarred the tower apart. Hisoka looked up at him again with the same smile but the Kurata was already looking out at the town; his expression reveling nothing.

"He's strong. He'll heal" Kurapica said breaking the silence after a while. He said that more from himself; he needed to hear it from someone other than Gon.

"Killua? Or Gon?" Hisoka asked and Kurapica looked back at him. Hisoka was absolutely useless when it came to these things. He desperately wished he would have brought Leorio instead; at least he would have actually cared about what was going on. Still Hisoka provided the necessary protection they needed right now. "How long?" Hisoka asked bringing Kurapica out of his own thoughts; he looked at him waiting further explanation. "How long do we wait until it's time to give up?" Hisoka clarified but Kurapica just kept on staring at him. He had no idea.

* * *

**Disclaimer : I do not own HunterxHunter**

**Side Note : Hey guys! I'm very glad (and I hope that so are you) I managed to finish this one before things get to busy around here. I felt bad leaving you on that cliff hanger; though... I'm not sure this chapter really helped all that much with that...ANYWAYS, I hoped you enjoyed reading this as always. I can't lie; this chapter, and probably a lot of the ones that follow, do take a toll on me, since I have to bring back not so very nice and fluffy memories from my own past. I sincerely hope it does help to make the story better and really bring out the feelings and thoughts of the characters so they might come across better and much more... human. **

**Please let me know what you think and thanks you to all of you who all ready do this in pretty much every chapter. Love you guys. **


	17. The Unavoidable

Chapter Sixteen – The Unavoidable

Gon lay next to Killua on the rough floor. He looked at him breathing in and out slowly; almost like he was only sleeping and would wake up at any moment. Why didn't he then? Ten days, that was how much time had gone by now. Gon lifted his hand from his chest and stroked the side of Killua's face. _Please wake up, _Gon pleaded. He been saying the words so many times in his head and out loud they had almost lost their meaning. Gon saw his fingers trembling slightly but he wasn't surprised. He felt so weak he could barely muster the strength to lift his hand to touch Killua.

"Killu" he said and the sound of his own voice would have scared him if he wasn't so numb; it was hoarse and frail. "I'm sorry I didn't listen to you" he said and knew he had said the same words over and over again to him but he still kept on trying. "I'm sorry I got us caught. I'm sorry I didn't let you kill her, you were right about that. You're right about everything" Gon felt the numbness slowly turn into sadness. The word sad didn't seem to fit all of the emotions that were overwhelming him but he guess it was the right word. He forced his body to move closer to Killua. He rested his forehead on the side of his face and stroked his thumb against Killua's cheek. His smell was fading away with each passing second.

"I'm sorry I thought we had all the time in the world" he said and felt the dampness of his tears on his cheeks. He was so used to it by now that he didn't even feel his eyes burning; he never bothered to keep them in. "I'm not giving up. I'll find a way" Gon said to him, reassuring Killua. "I heard you" Gon said, the words broke as he tried to will them out, "I thought I'd get a chance to tell you but then" he croaked with more tears streaming down his face. The memory of the troupe finding them flashed in his head again, "I want you to hear me, I don't want to say it and know you never really heard it" Gon felt the pain coming back in his chest; would it ever stop? "I don't want the first time I tell you that I love you be to this dead version of you. You deserve better than that, so please wake up" Gon said to him. He closed his eyes and kissed his cheek lightly, he felt the harshness of his dry lips against Killua's soft skin. "We deserve better than that. I don't want the first time I say it to be last Killu, or the only time. P-please come back to me. P-please don't leave me alone" Gon cried; he heard himself sobbing again. He hadn't cried like this since he realized what had happened. Gon knew too many days had passed, he'd seen Kurapica get more and more anxious around him always urging him to sleep or eat. He wanted Gon to let go, but he was never going to let go.

"Killua" he called again clasping Killua's hair and pressing his face closer to his.

"Gon" he heard Kurapica say behind him and froze. Why did he have to come now? What did he want now?

"What?" Gon asked viciously. He didn't care anymore about any of them, he hardly cared about himself right now. He heard Kurapica come closer to him.

"Gon, I'm so sorry" Kurapica said to him. Why was he saying that? It wasn't like Killua was dead; he'd wake up. He had too.

"No" Gon said knowing what his friend was going to ask of him. Kurapica moved closer to him; Gon felt somebody else come into the room with him. Gon had wondered who had been the person that had pulled him away from Killua that day, but he didn't care enough to ask. "Leave us alone" Gon said to the both of them.

"Gon this has gone on too long. You haven't slept in days, or eaten. If you could see yourself you'd understand why I'm like this" Kurapica said to him and Gon could hear the fear in his voice. Gon had grown used to it by now.

"I'm not leaving him" Gon said to him closing his arms around Killua again. He knew his arms were weak but he would hold on to him or die trying.

"Gon Killua wouldn't want you" Kurapica started but stopped at the look Gon gave him turning around.

"What? What wouldn't Killua want me to do?" Gon asked him franticly. Who did he think he was? "You don't know anything about him" Gon hissed viciously. "Killua would want me to keep trying; he'd do the same for me!" Gon said and turned his face back to Killua. He heard Kurapica shift his weight on his feet.

"No Gon, he wouldn't" Kurapica said his voice calmer now, for some reason this made Gon even madder. "You are skin and bones, you look worse than he does" Kurapica said. _So what?_ Gon thought to himself, _so what if he was dying? At least that way he would be with him._

"I'm not letting go" Gon said again and he heard Kurapica move towards them quickly, his step firm, like had decided on something. Gon heard the other person move towards him too and he braced himself. They wouldn't take him away. "He's still alive!" Gon screamed at the feel of Kurapica's hands pulling him.

"Gon, he's not in there!" Kurapica said and Gon could feel even more tears streaming down his face.

"There has to be something else I can do" Gon closed his arms tighter trying to fight Kurapica's incessant pulling.

"Gon, we've been over this. There's nothing more we can do; you just have to let go. I'm sorry" Kurapica said and Gon could hear his voice was breaking too.

"Alluka, we can find her. I don't care if it kills me. She loves Killua too, she'll do it" Gon pleaded once more but knew what Kurapica would say.

"Gon she's too far away. Killua's body is too weak, we can't move him and we don't know if we'll ever find this place again if we leave" Kurapica explained to him once more. Gon shook his head.

"I'm NOT letting go!" Gon said firmly and felt Kurapica's hands move from him. Good, he finally got it. Now if they would just leave them alone.

"I didn't want it to come to this Gon" Kurapica said and moved away. What was that supposed to mean? Gon lifted his head slightly only to be met with Hisoka's face staring right into his. Gon saw him raise his hand and before he could react, Hisoka struck him in the back of his neck with one swift chop and left him unconscious. Kurapica stood looking at them. Hisoka turned to look back at him in question.

"Take him downstairs and keep him there until I'm done" Kurapica said and Hisoka just grabbed Gon's limp body and carried him out of the room. He really didn't want it to come to this but Kurapica knew he had to be firm or else Gon would probably stay glued to Killua's side until he died. It was bad enough they had lost Killua, they couldn't lose Gon too. Kurapica looked down at Killua and saw the stream of Gon's tears on his right cheek. He felt his heart heavy and wished he didn't have to be the one to make this choice.

Kurapica sat himself next to Killua. His aura was weakly surrounding his body still. Kurapica wondered if he was making the right choice. He lifted his hands over Killua's body again.

"One more time then" Kurapica said closing his eyes and focusing his nen to cover Killua's body once more. This was the last try so he would make it worth it, he didn't have to think about the consequences since he'd have to kill Killua if it didn't work anyways. Kurapica felt his eyes burning and he held back whatever emotion was brewing inside him. He breathed in deeply and let his aura flow through Killua's body. He took another deep breath, mustering all the strength he had and focused on healing his body. His energy went from the tip Killua's toes all the way up his spine and to his brain. Kurapica felt sweat trickling down his brow. He held on to it as much as he could and the slowly resided.

He was sacred to open his eyes. He didn't want to open them to find Killua still looking the same. He wanted to have good news for Gon, for him. Slowly he opened his eyes and his heart fell to the ground. There he was, breathing slowly, only the faintest bit of aura around his body. Kurapica closed his eyes again and this time he did feel a tear dribbling down his cheek. _Why damn it? Why didn't it work? _He took a deep breath in and looked at Killua once more.

"I'm sorry Killua" Kurapica said in a whisper. He took off his robe and bundled it into a ball and kept it in his hands. He held it over Killua's face and closed his eyes to say a silent prayer for his soul. If only he would have known what was going to happen on this island, he would have never let them go. It made him so angry he wasn't someplace safe where he could wait longer. He knew Killua's body was strong enough to recover, he knew he was. He opened his eyes again and prepared to push the bundle to his face. He stopped halfway down; Kurapica's eyes widened as he looked at Killua's closed eyes flutter slightly. Kurapica's heart was beating fiercely in his chest as he looked down at his friend, his hands still hovering over his face. _Did it work?_

* * *

Gon gasped for air as he woke up frantic. He looked around him and saw he was in yet another room but this one had no windows, only a door and Hisoka was standing right next to it blocking his exit. Gon breathed harshly and felt the pain in the back of his neck. He felt the hate swell in his chest as he saw Hisoka faintly smiling at him. Gon helped himself up with the wall next to him.

"How long" God started and felt it hard to speak, his throat was completely dry. "How long have I been out?" He asked Hisoka and felt ready to punch him as his smile widened. Gon tried to think but that hit had dazed him completely and with the little sleep he had been getting he could have been out for more than an hour, maybe even a week. No, he would have been dead if he didn't eat for another week. His body felt the same; he could still make it.

"Ten minutes tops" Hisoka said looking away from him. Good, ten minutes, Killua was still alive. Gon looked at the walls around him; they didn't look too strong, he could probably crash right through them. He felt the rough material he was leaning against and thought twice about his plan as he saw his hand shaking to keep himself up. "I wouldn't recommend that if I were you" Hisoka said reading his thoughts. Gon looked at him. Did he expect him to just stay still and wait for Kurapica to murder Killua?

"Let me go" Gon said with the most aggressive voice he could assemble in his weary throat. Hisoka smiled and shook his head.

"Can't" He said to him with his stupid sing song voice. Gon looked back at the wall; he might be able to punch through it, he just needed to gather up some strength. _What strength? _ Gon thought panicked, he didn't have any. He hadn't had any for some time now; it was a miracle he was even up on his feet! _Killua, _Gon though, _do it for Killua. _Gon closed his eyes and thought about him as he gathered his nen on his right fist. His concentration broke as he felt a card fly inches away from his face and carve itself on the wall behind him. He looked at Hisoka.

"Let me go!" Gon screamed and Hisoka shook his head once more, "I'll give you what you want. I'll let you kill me" Gon said to him desperate to get out of the room. Hisoka's smile widened again.

"What is the point of killing someone who's already dead?" Hisoka said back to him and Gon felt a tear of anger burn the skin on his cheek. He clenched his teeth and forced his leg to take a step forward; he moved his hand from the wall holding him up and moved another step closer to Hisoka. He was strong enough to walk, but he knew he wasn't strong enough to fight him. What was he supposed to do?

"Do you want him to die? Don't you want to be the one who kills him?" Gon asked grasping on anything he could. Hisoka tilted his head at Gon and took a step forward.

"Too late!" he said brightly lifting up his finger, "Someone already took care of that" he said and bended his finger to point at Gon. Gon widened his eyes and felt his heart beating faster in his chest; he felt like his teeth might break from the pressure they were exerting on each other. Everything turned to red.

"Take that back" Gon said and took another step forward, closing the space between them.

"Oh how I missed those eyes" Hisoka said staring at him ignoring what Gon had just demanded of him. Gon took another step closer.

"Take it back" Gon said emphasizing each word and he walked closer. As he did, he started to gather his nen back on his right fist.

"I thought you didn't like it when I lied" Hisoka said teasing him. That was the last straw. Gon pushed himself from the floor and lifted off to punch him square on the face. He missed; Hisoka leaned to the side swiftly avoiding the attack. Gon tried to punch him over and over again, trying to get him excited. He could see Hisoka staring at him with that hunger in his face as he tried over and over again to hit him. Gon saw Hisoka shift slightly to the side and saw and opening, he pushed himself forward and darted to the gap on the door. Hisoka moved quickly and without much effort pushed him and he crashed on the wall behind him. Gon felt the little air he had in his lungs escape him.

"HE'S NOT DEAD!" Gon screamed at him feeling the uttermost panic. He needed to get out of there, why didn't he understand? Every second that passed was one more second Killua could be dead and Gon would be so far away from him. _What if he already is?_ No, Gon was sure he would be able to feel it when it happened. The world would be just too different and he had to be able to sense something had changed. Gon heard his heart hammering in his chest again.

"He's been dead a long time now" Hisoka said and Gon lifted himself from the floor and pushed himself towards Hisoka hoping the speed of his movements would confused him and let him jump through that gap. Hisoka pushed him back with ease again. "Nothing you do is going to change that" Hisoka said, the musical note in his voice made Gon turn murderous. He lifted himself again and prepared to shoot towards that god forsaken gap again.

"HE'S NOT DEAD!" Gon pushed himself again and shot towards the door, this time Hisoka didn't push him but just grabbed him by his neck and squeezed. Gon pulled on his hands trying to free himself from Hisoka; he felt the pressure of his grasp on his eyes.

"Yes he is" Hisoka said to him and this was the first time Gon saw him looking at him seriously. Gon dug his nails on Hisoka's skin and felt the wetness of his blood under them. He scratched frantically while trying to breathe in painfully.

"He's not dead" Gon croaked again and felt Hisoka's grasp tighten as he spoke. Gon felt like his eyes were going to pop out of his skull and he tried to kick him but he found he couldn't move his legs very much. Gon looked into his eyes and tried to beg him to let him go; to let him go to Killua so they could at least die together. Hisoka met his stare and if he understood the message in Gon's eyes he didn't care enough to let him go. Gon felt his mind getting foggy with the lack of air starting to affect his brain. Then he saw Hisoka's eyes shift slightly to the right reacting to sound behind him. Gon looked behind him and saw Kurapica standing there looking shocked with tears on his eyes. Gon felt someone reach into his chest and pull his heart out; just like Killua would have done.

"Hisoka you're going to kill him!" Kurapica said and Gon felt him let go. Gon fell to his knees and tried to catch his breath. He could only see both of their feet in front of him; he saw Hisoka's turn around to face Kurapica's. _He's gone; he killed him. _Gon's face was soon damp with the fast stream of his tears.

"Why?" Gon asked softly, he had never felt his heart in so much pain, "Why did you take him from me?" Gon asked, his vision completely blurred.

"Gon I didn't" Kurapica said and Gon saw him walk towards him and kneel down to his level. Gon blinked and saw the tears hit the floor. He looked up at Kurapica as he placed his hand on Gon's shoulder. He saw Kurapica's face; his face was wet with tears but he didn't look sad. He looked happy. "Gon he woke up" Kurapica said and Gon blinked at him.

"What?" Gon asked. He needed to hear that again.

"Killua woke up" Kurapica said and Gon blinked at him again. He had heard right; Killua wasn't dead. Killua was awake? Gon had to see him now. He tried to lift himself off the floor and felt Kurapica help him up. Gon pushed past him and looked at the hall ahead of him; he had never seen this part of the building. He looked back at Kurapica and saw him point ahead and he started walking. "Just right up the stairs to the left" Gon didn't even stop to listen to the words, he just tumbled on the walls, pushing himself towards him. Gon moved desperately until he reached the room. He blinked as he saw Killua missing from the place he was used to seeing him in. He grabbed on to the frame of the door and looked to his right? _Where is he?_

"You look like hell" Gon heard Killua's voice and he turned his head to the left. There he was. Gon saw Killua leaning against the wall trying to hold himself up; Killua's harsh voice sounded like heaven to his ears. He was really there. Gon felt the tears coming back up as life started to run through his body again; he wasn't completely sure if he was dreaming this or not, but he didn't care. Killua woke up.

* * *

**Disclaimer : I do not own HunterxHunter**

**Side Note : Oh it felt soooooooooooooo good to write that! I hope, my lovely readers, you enjoyed it too! With that said I wanted to address a couple of things from your past reviews. Firstly, I've switched the rating up to M. It kinda bums me out since when you search for HxH fanfic it automatically clears the M rated ones... but I guess it was the honest thing to do. (I can't help wanting more people to see it, I am ashamed; I've grown fond of that increasing number). **

**Secondly, and more seriously, Kalluto; as I have mentioned before I want to stay true to the story, but I feel like if I give him too much say in anything I might just end up screwing even more with the character. If you noticed I actually tried to keep him out of most of the scenes WITH Killua to avoid this particular problem. I'm not sure where I'll go with that but I might play more with his character in the future! **

**Thirdly, I will include more fighting scenes further along in the story since it's technically inevitable when writing about HxH and I do ask your patience if the description doesn't quite illustrate what's happening. One of the things I most like about HxH are the fights and they're always pretty fast so narrating them turns into kind of a challenge (at least to me) so sorry about that!**

**Fourth and last, thank you all for sticking with my story. It means the world to me to hear all those positive comments so I hope I can continue to entertain you with this little fantasy of mine to play you back! Thanks guys! XD **


	18. The Aftermath

Chapter Seventeen – The Aftermath

Killua felt himself slowly drift out of a heavy sleep; his whole body felt sore. Even opening his eyes felt hard but he still did and saw a blue bundle hanging over his face. He blinked a couple of times letting the image slowly come to focus.

"Killua?" he head Kurapica say and looked to his side to see his friend next to him; he was the one holding the bundle. Killua blinked at him; _what the hell is Kurapica doing here?_ The last thing he could remember was being wrapped up next to a tree with Nobunaga and Machi. Had Kurapica saved them? No, he remembered holding Nobunaga's heart in his hands, or maybe that had been a dream? He opened his mouth to say something but he felt the words stuck in his painfully dry throat. He coughed a couple of times. As he did he realized Kurapica was still staring at him with his mouth hanging open and tears streaming down his face.

"Y-you real?" Killua managed to ask and resumed to keep coughing some more. Kurapica just started at him. Killua felt his mind much clearer than it had been in a long time so he assumed they must have moved on to a place where they were no longer affected by the mind games of the island. "Yo, react" Killua said trying to force Kurapica into giving him some sort of information.

"You woke up" Kurapica said and Killua nodded feeling his neck tense. _Well yeah he woke up, what else was he going to do? Keep sleeping forever? _Then it hit him; the soreness of his body and the dryness of his throat not to mention Kurapica's reaction. How long had he been asleep for? "You're alive" Kurapica said and Killua felt even more shocked. What the hell had happened? Suddenly he felt panicked and looked around the room.

"Where's Gon?" he asked still hearing the hoarseness of his voice. Kurapica looked out at the door of wherever they were alarmed.

"Gon!" he said distressed and Killua felt even more fear at his expression. Kurapica looked at him and smiled, "He's okay; I'll go get him. Don't move" Kurapica said calming him and running out of the room. Killua looked around him once more. He tried to sit up but he felt his muscles rigid; he closed his eyes trying to focus his ten to see if it would help but he felt it weak around him. He opened his eyes and forced himself to sit. He looked around again and tried to understand where he was. It looked like a battered old building; where they still on the island?

Killua pushed himself to stand up very slowly; while he did he heard a loud bang and Gon screaming. He couldn't make out what he was saying in his dazed brain but the sound of Gon's voice gave him enough strength to stretch out his tense body. He leaned on the wall behind him and ran his hand on the wall making his way to the door; each step costing him a fair amount of pain. He looked at the door and saw a hand clasp to the frame; Gon. He was about to smile but then he entered the room letting Killua get a good look at him. Gon looked awful; he was skin and bones but the worst part were his eyes; they were wide open which only accentuated the dark circles under them. All of the bones of his face looked way more prominent than they should have been.

"You look like hell" Killua let out and Gon turned to look at him; he had been looking at the place where he had been a second ago. The look Gon gave him made his heart sick; he looked frantic, like he was looking at a ghost. He saw Gon starting to make his way to him, tears running down his face. What was going on? How long had he been out of it? It seemed to him that Gon and Kurapica were both acting like he had just risen from the dead rather than from a nap. Gon reached out his arms and Killua opened his and hugged him; Killua felt Gon's body shaking against his. The air escaped him with the strength Gon was holding on to him. Killua coughed but Gon didn't lessen his grip, he just held on tighter.

"Gon you're crushing my ribs" Killua said with a little laugh. Gon sobbed, his face buried in his neck, so Killua could feel the tears trickling down his skin. He heard Gon saying something, mumbling against him, but he couldn't make out anything. Killua looked back at the door and saw Kurapica come in and then Hisoka? What the hell? He looked at the pair confused and then back down at Gon; he tried to push him a little so he could make out what he was saying; his words were muffled against his neck. When that didn't work he moved his hands to the side of Gon's face and made him look up at him. Gon looked back into his eyes but that only sent more tears streaming down his face. "What happened?" Killua asked him, the worry overcoming him.

"Killu I'm so sorry" Gon cried out moving his hands to the side of Killua's face and resting his forehead on his. Killua looked sideways at the pair still looking at them from the door and felt a slight blush on his cheeks.

"Gon" he started but Gon interrupted him.

"I'm so sorry, it's all my fault but I knew you were alive. I'm so sorry, please don't ever die again. I love you" Gon said and Killua eyes widened, "I love you" Gon said a little more calmly; Killua felt his lips turn into a smile. "I love you" Gon said once more this time he closed his lips on his. Killua felt the harshness of their dry lips but he still felt unbelievably warm just hearing Gon say those words to him. He even forgot about the two people currently staring at them. Killua felt a blush creep up his cheeks again and moved from Gon's lips to look at the door. Kurapica looked at back him smiling.

"Let's go" he said to Hisoka turning his back.

"Why? This just got interesting" Hisoka said not looking away from them. Killua saw a chain wrap itself around him and drag him out of the room. Killua looked back at Gon and brushed his nose against his.

"Can you please tell me what's going on?" Killua asked him and Gon shook his head. He kissed him again and Killua felt the desperation his movements. Killua realized he was still shaking next to him and he felt so underweight. "When was the last time you ate?" Killua asked him starting to get used to using his voice.

"About the same time you did" Gon said closing his eyes. Killua looked at him puzzled.

"When was that?" Killua asked. Gon looked up at him and Killua saw his lips tremble and the tears welling up in his eyes again.

"Before the troupe got to us" Gon said but Killua knew he was avoiding something; almost like he was trying to forget.

"How long ago was that?" Killua pressed on and saw Gon let out a sob.

"More than two weeks ago" Gon let out in a whisper and Killua widened his eyes in response. "t-twenty days" Gon let out, Killua felt his chest tighten. He had been out of it for more than ten days; he looked at Gon and understood. Suddenly he remembered the sound of thread snapping.

"Machi" he said, Gon nodded and buried his face back on his neck.

"I'm so sorry; I should have let you kill her. I'll kill her I promise, please don't hate me. I'm so sorry" Gon said sobbing against his neck. Killua ran his fingers through his hair trying to comfort him but the shock of what he just learned combined with the shock of what Gon had said last didn't let him speak. Instead he kept on listening to Gon tell him how sorry he was over and over again. Killua had never seen him like this. He was begging to feel more worried about him than he felt about himself but one thing was for sure; next time he saw that bitch he wasn't going to hesitate.

* * *

They sat on a room below the one Killua had woken up in; Kurapica was in front of them and Hisoka leaned against the far wall. Killua need explanations, coherent and not muffled by crying explanations, which were all Gon had given him for the past three hours. Gon sat right next to him holding on to his hand tightly; it was the farthest Killua had been able to get from his tanned friend. He felt the bones in his hand grind against each other painfully as Gon held on tighter and tighter. Killua felt a slight embarrassment as he walked into the room a little while earlier; Gon half caring him and holding his hand. He figured he might as well brush it off since they had already seen them kiss and well Kurapica already knew about them anyways.

Killua just wanted to know what was going on and Kurapica finally obliged telling him all about it. He told them how he had heard from Hisoka that the phantom troupe was heading for the island and how he had no choice but to come. They, Kurapica and Hisoka, had been on the island too and Killua could now see the bruises and scars on their faces that lead him to believe them. Kurapica had been searching for them and when he finally reached the bridge and crossed over to the real island they had decided to wait and see if they found them there. Then the hard part came; they waited by the entrance, careful to hide themselves in case someone else might cross. They saw and heard a crash and ran towards it sensing something was wrong. Kurapica looked at Gon then; his worried expression only made Killua even more uneasy.

"Gon was holding on to you pretty firmly but Hisoka was able to pull him back. Apart from the damage done to your spine you guys had taken a pretty nasty fall. I mended your neck as best I could but you didn't wake up. I figured it might take a while because of the fall, so we brought you here" Kurapica looked around him.

"Where are we?" Killua asked him; Gon's hand kept pushing pain all through his arm. Killua tried loosening his grip but this only made him clench harder.

"I don't know" Kurapica admitted, "Hisoka and I found this place when we crossed and we haven't seen anyone here. I'm not even sure how this place exists but it's not only this house. There's at least ten of them; almost like a half-finished abandoned town" he explained as best he could.

"So you brought us here" Killua said letting out a sigh urging Kurapica to continue so he could make sense of all of this.

"Yes I healed Gon too. I saw all the tears in your skin and I assumed you must have run into the troupe. About a day and a half went by until Gon woke up. It was not until then that I started to really worry about you not waking up. Gon took most of the damage from the fall and his body looked way more beaten up than yours" Kurapica said and Killua remembered Machi concentrating her tortures only on Gon. He felt Gon's hand twitch in his at the mention of her name. "When he woke up first I thought you were gone for good" Kurapica said and looked away from them, almost as if he was ashamed to meet his gaze. Killua looked at Gon and saw him looking angrily at their blonde friend; no, Kurapica was only ashamed of looking at Gon.

"You lied" Gon let out besides him; Kurapica turned back to look at him with his guilt-ridden face.

"I didn't lie! I told you I didn't think it was likely he would wake up" Kurapica explained and Killua looked from one to the other.

"You said we'd wait until he did" Gon said again, resentment in his voice.

"You needed time to let go" Kurapica said and Killua saw Gon look down trying to hide his anger.

"You already thought I was dead" Killua said and Kurapica nodded. Killua looked at Gon; he saw the tears falling down his face but this time he understood. "You weren't with me" Killua said to Gon and Gon looked up at him his hand tightening up even more.

"I was trying" Gon said. Killua looked back at Kurapica and remembered the blue bundle above his face; his eyes widened as he reached a better understanding of what had happened. The reason why Gon was so mad at Kurapica and he was ashamed to look at them.

"You were going to kill me" Killua said and he saw the hurt in his blonde companions face. Gon had been with Hisoka then, he was probably holding him away while Kurapica finished him off. That was why he had heard those screams and loud noises; that was Gon trying to get away. Killua swallowed letting all of this sink in. He looked at Gon and felt so unbelievably sorry. Gon was trying his best to come to him, trying to protect him because he was unwilling to let go of him. Killua had felt that once too; he remembered the loss he had felt, the unwillingness to accept it. He closed his own fingers tighter around Gon's hand, the tips burring into his skin. He felt Gon's grasp relax; _he just need s to know I'm here._

"I'm sorry Killua, but I was worried. Gon is an absolute mess, look at him" Kurapica said and Killua felt his over protectiveness go into overdrive. He knew better than anyone how Gon was feeling right now, he didn't need anybody telling him that. Gon had been taking care of him all this time and now it was time for him to be taken care of.

"It's okay, I understand" Killua said and Gon looked up at his face; he looked hurt but Killua smiled at him and held his hand even firmer. Gon relaxed and understood Killua was on his side; he looked back down at his legs. "I'm still feeling pretty tired though. Gon, let's go back upstairs" Killua said and Gon immediately got up and pulled Killua with him.

"I'll help" Kurapica said and Killua shook his head.

"Gon can do it" Killua said simply and was glad to see a small smile on his partner's lips. They both stumbled and made their way back up to the room. Killua rested his back against the wall and pulled Gon to sit next to him. They both sat in silence for a while. Killua kept his grasp tight on Gon's hand and felt him relax with each passing second. He looked at Gon's out stretched legs before him; they had little scars all over them and they looked thinner than he remembered them. Killua leaned his head to the side and rested it on the side of Gon's head; he moved his other hand to the side of Gon's neck and stroked his cheek with his thumb.

"Thank you" he whispered and he felt the wetness of a warm tear reach the tip of his thumb. "Thanks for not giving up on me" he said again and kissed Gon's cheek.

"You would have done the same" Gon said back to him and Killua nodded.

"Damn straight" Killua said and he saw that little hint of a smile again, "I'm back" he said and Gon's eyes swelled with tears again but this time it was relief going all over him. "I'm not going anywhere so why don't we just sleep?" Killua said to him and Gon nodded. They both moved to lay down facing each other; their hands clasped together and their faces joined at the forehead. Killua felt Gon shaking next to him and released his hand and moved his arms around his shoulders to bring him closer. Gon's eyes were open looking straight at him. "You haven't been taking care of yourself" Killua said and he felt Gon tense, "please just sleep with me, I promise I'll be right here when you wake up" Killua said to him.

"Promise?" Gon asked and Killua nodded. He leaned in closer and kissed Gon's lips lightly.

"I swear" Killua said and kissed him, "I love you too" he whispered closing his lips over Gon's again and again.

"I love you. I'm so sorry" Gon said to him and Killua shut him up before he could keep on apologizing with a long kiss.

"No more sorrys okay?" Killua said pulling apart. He looked at Gon seriously until he nodded, "now let's get some sleep" he said and kissed him once more before he pulled him by his neck forcing him closer. Gon nuzzled his face on Killua's neck and sighed. He needed to make sure he got some rest; god knows Killua wasn't in such a hurry to fall back asleep, but he could tell it had been a long while since Gon had. Even while he held him he would doze off only to wake up frantic, checking to see if his was still there, alive. Killua would just hold him tighter and whisper sweet nothingness to him and wait for him to go back to sleep. Yes, Killua knew he had his work cut out for him but he wouldn't give up on Gon. He would try his best to keep him safe, just like had done with him.

* * *

Kurapica looked up at the celling hoping with all his might his friends were sleeping. His heart fell heavy with worry, but he was also so tired of it. His head was a mess trying to debate if he had been doing the right thing this whole time or if had only been selfishly thinking of himself. He thought if Gon could let go, he would be able to help him get through it. It was arrogant of him and he knew it; there was no way he could take Killua's place in Gon's mind but had thought for a second he could. The guilt he felt was so overwhelming he couldn't help feel hatred towards himself. He closed his eyes and tried to will them from tearing up; Hisoka was right in front of him and he wasn't eager to show any emotions to him.

"Funny thing about that boy" he opened his eyes to Hisoka's words. He was looking away from Kurapica with a thin smile on his lips. Kurapica looked at him wondering what he was going to say next, when he didn't he found himself pressing on for answers.

"Who?" he asked and Hisoka turned to look at him.

"First you and that other man with the glasses" Kurapica figured he must be referring to Leorio, "Then the Zoldyck boy who's been specifically trained not to care for other people, the old man from the hunter association, the ninja" he paused and let a little laugh escape his lips, "maybe even me".

"What?" Kurapica asked again wondering where he was going with this.

"What do we all have in common?" Hisoka asked him with his oily voice almost mocking him for not understanding right away.

"Nothing" Kurapica said angrily looking away from him. He hated being pulled into his stupid mind games. He saw Hisoka shake his head from the corner of his eye.

"We all want him" he said simply and now he knew he was talking about Gon, "In one way or another everyone always wants to protect Gon" he said with his sing song voice. Kurapica looked back at him. Hisoka looked back at him waiting for some sort of reaction but Kurapica gave him none. "Some might even confuse that feeling" he carried on when Kurapica said nothing. The Kurata felt a blush creeping on his cheeks and he looked away. Sometimes he got the overwhelming impression that Hisoka could read minds.

"Mind your own business" was all he said back to him and he heard his little creepy laugh beside him. The guilt inside Kurapica grew as he heard Hisoka laugh but he tried to shake it off him. He only wanted to protect Gon, nothing else. He had been so happy when Killua woke up so it made no sense that he would want to kill him to keep Gon for himself. He was only trying to do what was best. Suddenly his chest felt lighter as this sunk in and he ran Hisoka's words back in his head. It was what Gon brought up in people, what he brought up in him. He looked back at Hisoka smiling creepily at him; he found himself smiling back.

"You know, sometimes you can be shockingly insightful" Kurapica said looking away from him again and Hisoka laughed.

"Was that an insult or a compliment?" Hisoka asked him. Kurapica shook his head unwilling to give him the satisfaction of an answer; he knew he would chose to believe it was a compliment regardless of what he said. It surprised him, however, that he was able to find some sort of comfort in what Hisoka had said. Whatever; he was still the biggest murderous pervert in the planet and one or two words sporadic words of wisdom, that might or might have not been intended to cheer him up, were not going to change that. Hisoka smiled eerily; Kurapica got that mind reading sensation again and the overwhelming need to punch him in the face to wipe that smirk off it.

* * *

**Disclaimer : I do not own HunterxHunter**

**Side Note : Hey readers! Sorry this took me a while to post! I really hope you like it and I look forward to reading your thoughts on this.**

**To my reviewers : Wow. That is all I have to say. I never expected this reaction from anybody reading something I wrote, and I mean NEVER in my wildest dreams. Full disclosure; this has been a really rough week for me and some of those comments really helped me get through it. I thank you all from the bottom of my heart for all your kind words about the story; I hope you know that even thought the idea originated in my mind this story has only been able to get this far because of all of your kind words and encouragement Let's keep working, shall we? XD Thank you, really, thank you. **

**If you guys have any more doubts about anything in the story feel free to leave a comment and I will try and clear it up for you as best I can! I will try my best to post the next chapter ASAP! **


	19. Killua's Little Problem

Chapter Eighteen – Killua's Little Problem

Killua sat on the bundle Gon had brought in just seconds ago; it was his idea of making some sort of bed. Gon looked down at him expectantly and Killua couldn't repress a laugh at his friend's eager face.

"It's perfect" Killua said and Gon beamed at him.

"Really?" Gon said sitting next to him and trying it out for himself, "I found this old rag in one of the other houses and filled it with lots and lots of dead leaves" Gon explained him looking down at his creation with pride.

"Its way better than the floor that's for sure" Killua said laying back on it and feeling a slight comfort for his sore back. They had been sleeping over a rag on the cold floor a week now, and that wasn't counting the time he had spent in his coma. Killua thought about that; _well I guess it might be the right term. _ He looked at Gon and stretched his arm inviting him to cuddle with him. Gon hesitated and then made himself comfortable; Killua noticed the lack of weight on his arm and sighed.

"I'm glad you liked it" Gon said stroking Killua's chest before stopping himself; Killua grabbed his hand before he could move it away from him, "Since you told Kurapica you still weren't feeling well and that you wanted to stay longer, I thought you might like to be a little more comfortable" Gon explained to him and Killua inwardly cursed himself. He'd been so careful about approaching Kurapica without Gon noticing. _Why did he have to hear that? _ Killua thought furiously.

It was getting harder and harder for him to find some time to speak to Kurapica without Gon around since he refused to ever leave his side. This was one of the lovely side effects his _state_ had caused. Not that Killua minded Gon being at his side all the time, it's just it didn't leave him much of a window for him to discuss Gon's current mental state with someone else. A week had passed and even though some things were starting to improve slowly, like Gon's sleeping and eating, some new fun stuff kept popping out. The last thing he wanted Gon to hear was him lying to Kurapica about not feeling well when all he really wanted was more time for Gon to heal his intangible wounds. He knew perfectly well that if they left now it would only put him in danger.

He moved his hand to Gon's hair running his fingers through his dark mane. He immediately felt Gon tense under his touch. Killua couldn't help but sigh; this was one of those fun new things. Gon was now starting to flinch at his touch. Before, Killua had to beg him to let go of his hand to see if the bones could rearrange themselves from the position Gon had squished them in and now he hesitated every time Killua tried to reach out to him.

Killua moved his arm from under Gon's head and turned on his side to face him. He saw Gon relax as he moved away from him and he couldn't repress a glare. It was one thing to have to wake up every hour at night to calm Gon down and reassure him he was alive but this no touching thing was really getting on his nerves. At least the other one meant he cared about him, this one meant the exact opposite. Killua moved his hand to the side of Gon's face and made him look at him.

"Thanks for the bed" Killua said with a smile and Gon returned it.

"It was the least I could do. I'm really glad you liked it" Gon said to him, turning over on his side to face him but moving a little farther away. Killua moved closer to him and wrapped his arm around his waist holding him firmly in place.

"I do" Killua said kissing the tip of Gon's nose; Gon closed his eyes and smiled, crinkling his nose, "now we can stay here all the time" Killua said moving to kiss his cheek, "alone" he added kissing his other cheek, "with no one around" another kiss to his chin. He felt Gon tense up a little at his words but he just kept on kissing his face and made sure he had a firm grip on his waist.

"And sleep yeah, but it's still early and I think I smelled something a while ago, so maybe Kurapica got food" Gon said starting to pull away but Killua slipped his other arm under Gon's neck and pulled his face closer to his. He kissed Gon's lips; they felt so wonderful on his own. He kissed him again slowly, this time parting his lips slightly letting his breath warm his partner's lips. He opened his eyes to take a peek at Gon and was pleased to see he had his eyes closed and his cheeks showed a light pink tint on his tanned skin. Killua closed his lips on his again with a little more pressure and felt Gon melting into him; yielding to his will. He smiled against Gon's lips and nibbled on them softly.

_Much better, _Killua thought to himself pulling Gon closer and pressing his body against his. Gon pulled his body back not letting Killua feel him properly for too long and broke their kiss but before he could come up with some lame excuse, Killua pulled his face back and tasted the inside of Gon's mouth. Oh it had been too long; he couldn't help but lose himself in the kiss just as much as Gon did. Killua was happy to see that he had at least stopped him from wanting to squirm away from him for a second. Killua moved over him placing one of his legs in between Gon's and letting his weight pin him down. He felt Gon's hands on his shoulders gently pushing him away but he held on firmly to his lips and kept on kissing him. Killua ran his hand up the side of Gon's bare chest until he reached the side of his face and held him in place as he traced his kisses away from his mouth and all the way over to his neck. Gon was breathing heavily under him and Killua couldn't help his body from reacting; he felt himself growing next to Gon's leg.

"Killua" Gon said and Killua thought for a moment he was moaning his name until he added a stop after it. Killua lifted his face and looked at Gon; his cheeks were flushed and he had that unmistakable lust in his eyes. _He doesn't want me to stop, not really_. Killua kissed him again and ran his hand back all the way from his face down his chest and stopped at the edge of Gon's shorts. Killua noticed the pressure of Gon's hands on his shoulder was a little stronger now but Gon still kissed him back and Killua knew any minute now he would feel Gon firm against him too.

"Guys! Come down! Time to eat!" Kurapica called from below and Gon broke apart from him but Killua only moved back to his neck.

"See? I told you. Let's go eat" Gon said pushing him back.

"We can eat later" Killua said but he felt Gon escape his grasp and move away from him entirely. Killua looked up at Gon standing over him breathing heavily; his hair was a mess and his face was flushed. Killua ran his eyes over him and saw, right below the soft looking skin outing the muscles on his front, his shorts unbuttoned. How was Killua not supposed to be insanely attracted to him? He wanted Gon so badly. "You look amazing. Come back down" he said smiling and extended his hand, inviting him to come closer. Gon blushed furiously to his words.

"No, let's go eat. I'm starving" Gon said to him.

"Yeah so am I" Killua said with a little laugh. Gon looked away from him; he was sure his face was probably intimidating the squeamish boy more than his words. If his face was any reflection of the way he was feeling he probably looked a lot like Hisoka right about now.

"Great then let's go eat" Gon said obviously choosing to ignore the fact that Killua wasn't talking about food. He walked to the door and stood there waiting for Killua to get up. Even Killua knew when to admit he had lost a battle. He looked down to himself and saw the painful tent on his pants; he groaned and cursed. Gon stood by the door pretending he wasn't noticing anything weird with Killua's delay on the bed. This was just his luck; Gon wouldn't ever actually leave him, but now he always kept a chaste distance. _This isn't over Freecs_, he thought to himself getting up from their bed and walking behind him, _I'm not planning on losing the war_. Kurapica looked confused as Killua shot him a glare of pure hatred; he had been so close.

* * *

They all sat on the floor of the room with one of the walls missing around a small fire; Killua looked at Gon as he finished up the last piece of rabbit. He couldn't help but smile at this and as he turned to look at Kurapica he noticed so was he. It was quite an achievement to see Gon eating something after all this time. It had been a slow process but he looked almost normal now; if they could get that look of desperation gone from his face. Even as they ate, Gon sat with one hand holding his food and the other one grasping Killua's hand. If his grasp had gotten softer or he had gotten used to the pain, Killua didn't care as long as he knew Gon was healing. He only wished he wanted to heal in _other _aspects.

"We're running out of water" Kurapica said looking into the crate that held it. Killua looked back at him.

"Where are you getting the water from?" Killua asked.

"There's a lake not too far away from here. There's fresh water" Kurapica said to him.

"We'll go get it tomorrow" Killua said and Gon turned to look at him.

"I'll get it! You don't have to go" Gon said and Killua frowned at him.

"I think I can handle a walk to the lake. Plus I really want to shower" Killua said feeling a little uncomfortable in his own dirt.

"I can bring you water for you to do that" Gon said putting down the last of his meal; he didn't finish it. Killua looked down at the last bit of rabbit on the bone.

"Gon we'll go together you can help me if anything goes wrong" Killua said to him but Gon still seemed a little distressed with the whole idea. Killua rolled his eyes and looked away from him to Kurapica hoping to get some support on the matter. Kurapica frowned back and chewed on his lip.

"It's not far Gon. Just get back before it gets dark" Kurapica said to his friend giving him a warm smile of reassurance. Gon looked like he would rather do anything but take Killua out of his safe little prison.

"Gon I can't stay locked up in here forever. We're still in the middle of Pandora; we have to move" Killua said to him and Gon looked back at him concerned.

"Not until you're better" Gon said to him and Killua let out a sigh.

"I'm leaving for the lake tomorrow. You can come with me or stay; either way I'm going" he said firmly letting go of Gon's hand and standing up. Killua started to walk out of the room; he heard Gon getting up and walking after him.

"Why do you have to go?" Gon asked him as they walked back up to their room.

"Because Gon being locked up in this place is driving me crazy" he said to Gon as they reached the room. He turned to look at him, "And I stink. It's win win" he said softly tapping Gon's cheek with his hand and smiling.

"No you don't. You don't smell like anything, ever" Gon said to him and Killua let out a chuckle. He let his eyes adjust to the darkness as he saw the moonlight creep in through the window. He sat on their bed and lay down.

"Gon just let it go. I'm going" Killua said closing his eyes. He felt Gon sit beside him and he waited for him to lay down too. Killua smiled to himself and turned to hug Gon before he could move away from him. Gon was giving his back to him like he had expected him too; Killua kissed the nape of his neck.

"Fine we can go. Now just go to sleep" Gon said stiffly. Killua ignored his comment and held Gon tightly, moving his legs so that he could press himself completely against Gon. He kissed Gon's neck and stroked his chest with his hand. "Killua, please" Gon begged him.

"You don't sound very convincing" Killua said moving his hand from his chest to his hip and moving his body against him. Killua felt himself growing warmer at the feel of Gon's firm body against him; _God, why do I have to be so attracted to him? _

"Killua just stop" Gon said a little more firmly and turned around to look at him. Killua could see his expression was no longer soft; he felt his temper rising.

"Why?" Killua asked him.

"I'm trying to sleep" Gon said and Killua knew he was lying to him; that only made him angrier.

"Well, I didn't mind it when you did it" Killua shot back at him. He saw Gon look back at him confused.

"When did I –" Gon started but he stopped as he reached understanding; his eyes widened. Killua felt himself blush; Gon really didn't remember and now he brought it back up. Great. "The hotel" Gon said and Killua cursed himself; _why did I have to bring that up now? _

"Yeah" Killua let out and turned to look up at the ceiling.

"That's what happened" he heard Gon say besides him, "Killua" Gon said and Killua felt his hand on his cheek as pulled his face to look at him; Gon looked upset, "I'm sorry" he said and Killua let out a laugh.

"Why? I didn't mind it at all" Killua said back truthfully.

"I really thought I had dreamed that" Gon said looking down; Killua didn't get why he was getting so upset. He understood if he had been embarrassed but not upset.

"Gon it's okay; if anything, I was the one who took advantage of the situation. You were sleeping and drunk and I was very much awake and sober" he said and Gon looked up at him and shook his head.

"I treated you horribly the next day. That's why you wanted to leave" Gon said surprising Killua. The thought hadn't crossed his mind since Gon's lips had touched his for the first time. All the hurt he had felt that day had just vanished the moment he knew that Gon felt the same way about him. It never occurred to him to ask him about it.

"You didn't know" Killua said finding himself unable to meet his gaze, "You didn't remember".

"But you thought I did" Gon said and Killua nodded slowly still not looking up at him. "I'm so sorry" he heard Gon say to him again, "I'm sorry I pushed you away" Killua looked up at him; Gon looked really upset.

"We both made a lot of mistakes. It's okay Gon; I know how you feel now. That's enough for me" he said to him and smiled. Gon smiled back at him and kissed him lightly; Killua felt the butterflies stir in his belly again; _he kissed me._ Killua returned his kiss and moved his hand to the side of his face; Gon pulled away from him.

"Gon" Killua said closing his eyes and letting out a sigh, "why are you pushing me away now?" Killua asked looking back at him; Gon looked at him lost for words. It took him a few minutes to gather up the courage to speak and when he did it was only a whisper.

"It's was my fault this happened to you. I couldn't think about anything else but touching you and then they found us" Gon said to him and Killua shook his head.

"Gon you know that was part of the plan" Killua said to him, "We were supposed to get caught" he said grabbing the sided of Gon face and shook him slightly trying to get this inside his head.

"I know but every time you do _that_ I can't stop seeing you dying in my head" Gon said looking away and Killua breathed in.

"Gon I'm not dead" Killua said to him.

"But you were" Gon said and Killua could see his eyes watering again, "I just can't Killua; not right now" Gon explained and Killua tried his best to understand. If the situation had been reversed and it had been Gon dying in his arms, the moment he got him back all he would be able to do was _that_. But he needed to understand; Gon was too proud and he needed to forgive himself before he could even think about moving on. Killua took a deep breath in.

"Gon" Killua said softly stroking the side of his face, "I don't blame you; not one bit. But if you need to hear it then" he said and smiled at Gon, "I forgive you for sexually assaulting me up against a tree and getting us caught" Killua said and was relieved to hear Gon laugh at what he'd just said.

"Thanks" Gon said still smiling.

"But you should know that if you hadn't done it, I would have sexually assaulted you" Killua said getting another laugh from Gon, "I would have been the one that got us caught. Would have you held it against me?" Killua asked him and Gon shook his head at once.

"Not at all" Gon said to him and as he said it, the meaning of his words started to slowly sink in.

"Then stop holding it against yourself" Killua said and kissed him lightly. Killua hugged him and was glad to feel Gon hugging him back instead of tensing under him. "I'll wait" Killua said to him and heard a muffled thank you against his chest. He smiled and hoped he could gather up the patience to wait for him because just being this close to him was getting him worked up again. _Breath Killua, _he thought to himself, _stop being such a pervert._

* * *

**Disclaimer : I do not own HunterxHunter**

**Side Note : Howdy! Hope you liked this chapter, it's been a while since things were this light weren't they? Don't worry about me drifting from the plot, trust me, I know where I'm going... sort of. Anyway, the story has always been about Gon and Killua more than it is about Pandora and that you will come to realize even more towards the end of it. With that said, I just want to thank all new reviewers for all your comments. I do enjoy constructive criticism and I'll get on those mistakes as soon as I can; I actually re read what I write a million times before I post it but little things keep getting away. I guess that's why people use editors; sometimes you just need that outside perspective to clear things up! **

**I have another week of hard work ahead of me, but I'm REALLY looking forward to writing up the next chapter since it's already pretty clear in my head. It's one of those chapters that got me into writing this in the first place so I hope it comes up as good as I imagine it in my head. Look forward to it! XD**


	20. The Lake

Chapter Nineteen – The Lake

Killua felt the sun warming his body and drying his clean skin as he lay naked close to the lake. His clothes were hung on a tree not too far from him. It felt great to just relax outside that goddamn grey room; he could feel his muscles and his motivation growing stronger. He couldn't wait for a chance to fight again. The image of Nobunaga's heart in his hand and the light escaping his eyes made a small, secret smile for on his lips. He noticed he was humming; _how weird am I? Getting giddy over the thought of my last kill. _ But what a kill it was; a member of the phantom troupe. Even Hisoka had looked amazed as he retold the story to Kurapica not letting one single detail escape him. Killua opened his eyes to see Gon's head still floating over the surface of the lake. He had looked proud too; that was until he remembered what happened next. It didn't matter; Killua would give him his next kill, Machi, and he would let go of everything.

"I don't think it'll take too long for our clothes to dry now" Killua called out to him not looking his way. Killua couldn't hide the smile from his face and he knew Gon was glaring at him from somewhere in that lake. He had refused to come near him after Killua had taken all of his clothes off. Then he realized he had to come out naked and wait for their clothes to dry. Gon decided against it and stayed in the lake pretending he was enjoying himself so much he didn't want to come out, possibly until their clothes were complete dry and fit for use. "I can feel my skin starting to burn" Killua said sitting up and stretching. He got up from the ground and looked at Gon; he laughed at his friend purposefully looking away from him. "I'm going to take a nap under the tree" he said referring to the tree where their clothes hung. Killua walked to the tree and touched his pants; not long now. He would wait for Gon to change and then they could go back. He rested his body on the ground again, folding his arms behind his head, and started to drift back to sleep. The wind around him slowly caressing his skin made him dream he was flying.

Gon looked at the distant tree and sighed. He just had to come to the lake didn't he? Now they were all alone because of course Kurapica didn't want to come along and well Gon really didn't want Hisoka to come along. It was bad enough he had to deal with one pervert, he didn't need two of them. The truth was Killua wasn't alone in his thoughts; Gon wanted him too. Every time he looked at him it made his heart sick; he wanted to be closer to him but the memory of his limp body was still too fresh in his mind. What if they came back? Now Killua couldn't even defend himself and clearly Gon wasn't enough. He wasn't able to protect him back then how was he ever going to do it now? Even this short distance between them was making him crazy; every second he wasn't touching Killua was too much. How else would he know he was alive? Gon never knew now, if he was dreaming or not. Every time he closed his eyes he dreamt about Killua's dead eyes looking ahead. He had to touch him and feel him react to convince himself that this was the reality; Killua had come back to him.

Gon sunk into the water; he saw the fish swimming clearly around him. Why did they have to come? Gon felt this horrible pitch in his stomach telling him something was wrong. He never used to listen to it before, but he felt like it might be time to start. After all not listening to it and getting on the island had been his first mistake. Gon didn't trust himself; every impulse he had since they got here had only led them into more and more trouble. Killua could try to make him feel better but he knew this was all his fault. If Killua had actually died it would have been on him; on him and his stupid drive to go looking for someone who didn't want to be found.

He swam across the lake moving closer to the edge in case something happened. He could hear what was happening outside still but he didn't want to risk it. He saw a fish dash next to him and he followed it with his gaze. _I should catch that, _he thought to himself, _it would make a nice dinner. _He looked at the fish swim away and just then the light flickered inside the lake and he saw something on the other side; something glowed. He shot back up from the water to get some air and then dove back in; he looked at the wall but he saw nothing. Maybe it was a trick of the light. He concentrate his gyo on his eyes on a whim and saw the glow again, this time much more defined. He swam towards it and found it was the entrance to a cave. This was certainly worth exploring; he swam back to the edge of the lake eager to tell Killua what he'd just seen.

Gon stuck his head out of the water and looked at the tree up ahead; he hesitated for a second. _I'll just go around before he realizes I'm there; I can change in a second. _Gon got out of the lake and walked quietly, moving around the tree. He smiled to himself as he heard no sound coming from Killua. _Take that, professional assassin. _He grabbed his pants and slipped them back on quietly and rejoiced on his small success. He was about to zip his pants up when his eyes drifted towards Killua; Gon gulped completely forgetting what he was supposed to tell him. Killua was sleeping on the ground, his milky skin almost glowing in the shadows. Gon couldn't help his eyes from drifting lower on his naked body; he felt himself growing warmer and warmer. His was frozen unable to move or take his eyes away from him; Killua was just too perfect.

"Hi" Gon heard Killua say to him and jumped in surprise. He looked back at his face, embarrassed, and saw him smiling at him.

"Hi" Gon said stiffly back. They looked at each other for what seemed like hours. Gon could feel his heart racing and his face growing warmer. _He looks so soft to touch_, Gon thought, not being able to control his desires. Gon saw Killua extend his hand to him.

"Come here" Killua said to him making Gon blush even more. What was he supposed to do? Just grab his hand and give into him? He didn't want to upset Killua like he had the day before; starting something he just couldn't finish. Gon hated the look of frustration and disappointment in his face. But this face he was giving him now, this wonderful warm face that he only shared with him, was making it harder to stay away. Gon moved his own hand and placed it over Killua's; he didn't let him pull him down but rather just sat himself next to him. Gon tried with all his might to calm down and look the other way; they were outside exposed. He couldn't go through with this again.

The sound of Gon coming closer to him had made Killua's heart race but it was nothing compared to opening his eyes and finding Gon looking at him that way. It was the same way he had looked at his dark haired friend as he took all his clothes off before jumping into the lake. Even though he had been so uncharacteristically shy about it; that had only brought a smile to his face. Killua sat upright next to Gon.

"Your clothes are dry" Gon said to him, not looking his way. Killua reached out and touched Gon's pants.

"Liar" Killua said feeling the fabric still moist to the touch. He leaned in and gave Gon a kiss on the cheek; he didn't move away from him but just lingered close to his skin. "What were you looking at?" Killua asked and he saw his breath caused goose bumps in Gon's skin.

"Nothing" Gon lied quickly. Killua grabbed the side of his face and made Gon look at him.

"Liar" Killua said again. He moved over Gon and sat on top of him; Killua straddled him and Gon looked back at him alarmed. His eyes went from Killua's eyes to his lap and back. Killua grabbed Gon by his hair and kissed his neck.

"Killua" Gon said shifting his shoulder upwards to keep Killua away from his neck; he just moved to the other side.

"Just let me kiss you" Killua said against his skin. Gon's arms were awkwardly at his sides, not knowing what he was supposed to do. Killua moved to look at him, "hug me" he asked of him softly and Gon just couldn't resist the sweetness of his request. Gon wrapped his arms around Killua and felt the soft silk-like texture of his skin. Gon had never heard Killua ask him to hug him before; in fact he had heard him many times asking him to stop. Gon held on tightly to him and buried his face on his chest; he felt Killua's hands stroking his hair.

"I love you so much" Gon heard himself say, rubbing his face to feel Killua's softness. Killua smiled at Gon's words; he grabbed the sides of his face and made him look up at him.

"Me too" Killua said and kissed him. Killua was half expecting Gon to tense up again and purse his lips making it hard from him to properly kiss him but he was pleasantly surprised to find this was not the case. Gon gave himself completely to the kiss; it had been a long time since Killua had felt Gon kiss him back so willingly. Killua felt himself go desperate; he wanted more from Gon. He grabbed on to his hair and pulled him closer deepening their kiss. He had forgotten just how naked his was until he felt Gon's hand moved in between them and grab him; he moaned breaking apart their kiss. He looked at Gon and saw that lustful spark he had ignited in him not so long ago.

"I missed that" Killua said closing his eyes to feel Gon's touch better. He rubbed his face against Gon's and moaned into his ear; he could hear his breathing growing heavier. He felt a pang of pain as he felt Gon loosen his grip. "Don't stop" Killua told him but he only felt Gon moving his hand away from him.

"Killua we shouldn't" Gon said and Killua moved apart from him to look at his face. _You've got to be kidding me!_

"Gon if we get caught right now, I will assume complete responsibility for it okay? Now can we just pick up where we left off?" Killua asked trying to keep his face from showing his frustration. Gon didn't look at him, "Gon, god! What is it?" Killua asked completely failing in his former task. Gon looked like he was struggling with something.

"I just" Gon said and Killua waited for him to continue, "I don't want to hurt you" he said the last words with a long pause in between each one. Killua looked at him in disbelief.

"Why the hell would you hurt me?" Killua asked.

"Well you know. Every time we end up doing that I" Gon said looking away from him, "I hurt you. I just don't want to" Gon said to him and Killua let out a laugh.

"Gon your hurting me much more right now, trust me" he said and upon seen the look of distress on his face he quickly corrected himself, "No, I didn't mean that. It's just its not bad pain; it's really, really, really good pain" Killua said to him but he still saw Gon's hesitation all over his face. There was no way in hell Killua was going to back off now. He knew Gon wanted him just as much as he did; if he didn't he wouldn't have reached out to touch him. He thought about it and the answer came slowly in to his head. "What if" Killua said and Gon looked up at him, "I hurt you instead?" Killua asked him and felt Gon's blush mirror his own. Gon looked at him with his mouth slightly open; his eyes were moving quickly and Killua could tell he was thinking about it. Killua gulped with the anticipation of what he had just suggested; he wasn't going to lie, he had thought about it more times than he could count. The idea of actually getting to do it was making him desperate. Slowly, Gon nodded.

"Okay" he said quietly and the words had barely left his mouth when Killua was already covering it with his own. Gon had agreed to it; Killua felt like he might just climax with the idea of it. There was just so much he wanted to do to him; Gon had no idea what was in store for him. Killua broke apart their kiss and moved off Gon; he kneeled down in between his legs and pulled off his pants. Gon looked at him wondering what was going to happen next. Killua looked at his face and smiled; he saw Gon blush.

"Now, remember you're not supposed to make too much noise" Killua said to him and Gon looked like he was about to ask him why he was warning him about that but a second later he got it. Killua bent down and wrapped his mouth around him. Gon felt a shiver go all the way up his spine; Killua's mouth felt so unbelievably warm and soft. Killua started to move and Gon thought it was basically impossible to stay completely silent; it was just too much for him to take. He moved his hand to cover his mouth but soon found it better to just bite on to it to keep himself from moaning too loudly. He grabbed on to Killua's hair and pulled on it feeling his movements on his hand making him wild. Killua looked up at him and moved away and smiled at his reaction; Gon moaned in disappointment and thrust his hips up slightly not wanting the contact break.

"That didn't hurt at all" Gon said to him and Killua let out a laugh. Killua buried his face again in between his legs and Gon admitted that was probably the best thing he had ever experienced in his life. He felt the pleasure building up in his body quickly; Killua would slow down and then speed back up making him crazy. Killua moved his hands over Gon's firm legs all the way up to his chest; Gon grabbed his hand and held it tightly bring it up to his mouth and biting him. Killua couldn't hold back his smile as he kept on moving rhythmically over him. He felt the vibrations from Gon's moans on his fingers and he reached out to touch his tongue with them.

Killua moved away from him, grabbing Gon and pulling him down on the ground. He fell on top of him and kissed him; Gon's finger tips were tracing their way from his shoulders down his back. Killua deepened his kiss and moved his body against Gon's; he had tried his best to not be too aggressive with him before but he just couldn't control himself now. Killua broke their kiss and moved back down in between his legs; he licked his own fingers before he started exploring Gon's body even more. He heard a little yelp of pain as he dove one of his fingers into him. He tried to control himself to the feel of Gon's body around him.

"Just relax" Killua said to him moving his finger inside of him. He closed his mouth around him again and felt the muscles around his finger relax. Tentatively he moved another one in and felt Gon's hips thrust upward this time, inviting him in. He knew he was touching that very sensitive place Gon had touched many times before making him wild. Killua heard himself moan to his reaction; that was about as much as he could take. He moved back up to level with Gon's face only this time he brought his legs over his shoulders. Gon looked at him expectantly and he leaned in to kiss him roughly; he held their moans in their kiss as he pushed inside him. Just like their first kiss, Killua could have imagined this a million times, but nothing came close to reality. Gon's body felt open to him and his intrusion; it almost seemed like it was pulling him in and the feel of it was enough to drive him mad. Killua moved in and out of him slowly feeling everything as best he could; he kept on like that for a while until he heard Gon groan loudly.

"Go faster" he said to Killua; Killua just smiled and shook his head.

"I'm going to take my time with you" he said pulling away almost entirely and then moving in slowly watching the reaction of his movements on Gon's face, "for as long as I want" he said pushing himself a little roughly in; Gon moaned even more and closed his eyes. He leaned back in and kissed him; Gon bit his lip as he moved away and that just felt like the cheery on top. Killua kept on moving slowly over him over and over again; every time he felt he was close to finishing he would stop and start again. He had waited too long for this moment to let it be a five minute thing. After a while the pleasure building up in both their bodies was reaching a point where he just couldn't stop to control himself any more.

"Gon" he said stopping and trying to get his attention again, "I'm going to move away from you" he said to him starting to pull back. Gon looked at him alarmed.

"Why?" Gon demanded; Killua let out a laugh. He moved over and laid his back on the ground.

"Come on. Sit on top of me" Killua said pulling him over. Gon looked at him slightly confused but he moved over him. Before he could sit down completely Killua guided himself back into him; they both groaned at the contact of Killua sinking in to him with ease. Killua looked at him and smiled cheekily, "Now you can do whatever you want with me" he said to Gon. Gon moved slowly at first trying to understand how he was supposed to do it; then he picked up the pace as his confidence grew. The look in Killua's face every time he moved just made him want more and more. Gon let out a gasp as Killua closed his hand over him and started to stroke him at the same rhythm Gon was moving over him. Killua looked up at him and Gon knew all too well what he was feeling; he too felt increasingly close to finishing with Killua caressing him.

"Faster" was all Killua could say; Gon obliged making his movements quicker and shorter. He saw Killua's face transform and it took him over the edge; he grabbed on to Killua's hand and himself; feeling him finish in their fingers. Just as he did Killua let out an amazing moan and thrust his hips upward; Gon saw him close his eyes and arch his back throwing his head back. Killua felt his toes curl and the rest of his body shiver; never in a million years had he imagined just how amazing finishing inside Gon would feel. He was still throbbing inside him making him feel more connected to his friend than he ever had. They both breathed heavily as the pleasure started to subside. Killua opened his eyes to look at him, his mouth still hanging open; that was the first time Gon had let him finish after all.

"Come here" Killua said and Gon moved to bury his face on his neck. Killua hugged him and turned him over to the side pulling himself out of him. Gon wrapped his arm around him pulling him closer.

"Killu" Gon said against his chest.

"Yeah?" he asked and Gon could still hear his breathing harsh.

"I think I love you even more now" he confessed and Killua let out a laugh; he moved to his face to kiss him. Gon had such a simple way to convey all of his own complex feelings; he too felt like he loved him even more now.

"Good" Killua said to him and kissed him back. Gon saw Killua's face; he was flushed and he could see the sweat trickling down the side of his face. He moved his hand to wipe it off.

"How do you know so much about these things?" Gon asked him and Killua smiled but didn't open his eyes.

"I have a very dirty mind" Killua said teasingly and Gon shoved him slightly but he couldn't manage to keep his smile on check.

"I'm serious. I don't know anything; you have an unfair advantage" Gon said to him. Killua opened his eyes and looked at him; he ran his fingers thought the side of his face caressing him softly.

"I don't know about these things either Gon, I've just been imagining that scenario for a long time now, you could say I was practicing in my head" Killua said to him, "and you have very good instincts as far as I'm concerned so I don't have an unfair advantage" Gon thought about what he just said.

"Does it live up to it?" Gon asked after a while and Killua almost let out a laugh. Did it ever! Killua brushed his thumb over Gon's jaw and leaned in to kiss him again softly. He was sure that all of the thoughts he had ever had of Gon where mostly born out of lust but when reality came in it was something completely different; it just couldn't compare. When he kissed Gon gently, like he was doing now, he felt Gon press himself to him, his warm breathe on his lips, something stirred in his chest so violently he had a hard time understanding it. At first he thought it was nerves but the feeling got stronger even though he felt more and more comfortable with Gon in this particular aspect. The only conclusion he could reach was that he, Killua Zoldyck, was completely head over heels in love with the boy that was currently wrapped around him, brushing his lips against his.

"Yes. It does" Killua said simply after a few more soft kisses. He felt Gon run a hand through his hair and the tingle he felt made him practically purr. Gon buried his face on Killua's neck kissing him; he rubbed his body against Killua causing him to smile.

"You were right" Gon said and Killua felt himself being turned on by the hoarse sound of Gon's voice; he knew that deep sound only emanated from him when he was particularly aroused. He felt his body react to the sound and smiled to the effect this tanned boy had on him; it couldn't have been more than ten minutes since he came.

"Hmm?" Killua managed to answer pressing his body harder against Gon's, allowing him to properly rub up against him.

"It's really good pain" Gon repeated Killua's words back to him and Killua's eyebrows rose in surprise. He had seen Gon thoroughly enjoy himself and wondered if maybe he just might be able to take pain better than the former assassin.

"Don't get too used to it. I rather like having you inside me" Killua whispered and he smiled when he heard Gon groan at his words. He moved over Killua placed himself in between his legs and rubbed their hardness together roughly while he placed heated kisses on his collar bone.

"Good" Gon said to his chest and Killua felt Gon reach out his hand and cup his bottom making him arch his body closer to him. Killua let out a moan and felt his body shake as he ran his fingers through Gon's hair, pulling on it roughly, not being able to control the impulses Gon was sending through his body with his movements. Gon reached his fingers in between his legs to find his entrance and Killua pulled his face up and kissed his lips harshly; he felt their lips burn from the roughness of their kiss.

"You know" Killua said parting from him and holding Gon's flushed face above his. Killua saw the lust in his dark brown eyes and almost appreciated the way they looked with those dark circles under them; making him look wilder. He thrust his hips upwards causing a moan to escape from Gon's lips; he clenched his teeth with a look of pure desire and sunk his finger inside of him.

"What?" Gon asked bringing Killua back to reality. He moved his hips and pressed on the now two fingers exploring him; Gon's eyes not leaving his face. Killua knew he was getting off on the reaction he was causing him.

"It's been such a long time" Killua said surprised at the weakness of his voice, "I can barely remember how it felt" Killua said teasingly and Gon smiled before he moved his face back to his neck and kissed him harsher.

"You want me to refresh your memory?" Gon said against his neck sending a shiver down Killua's spine. _God, yes._

"I need you to" Killua said and moaned to the absence of Gon's receding fingers. Gon mimicked Killua's earlier movement and placed his legs over his shoulders and before either of them could say another word Gon sunk into him and they were both lost.

A while later they floated in the lake; the sun threatening to sink any minute now, but they couldn't be bothered. Gon moved his legs softly under the water keeping them afloat while Killua wrapped his body around him placing small kisses on his face. Killua rubbed his hands over Gon's head and down over his back. He thought he could still feel his bones way too much under his fingers; but he was better. Gon was getting better; Killua couldn't help but shake that uneasy feeling in the pit of his stomach off and smile. Killua rubbed his face against Gon's and wondered when he had fallen so deeply in love with him. This tanned boy was his and he knew Gon felt the same way about him; somehow that feeling felt like it could tackle anything. He knew they could he through this; Gon would go back to being his normal self eventually, Killua would make sure of it.

"Oh!" Gon let out and Killua pulled away to look at him. Gon was looking behind him; Killua turned and looked around puzzled but saw nothing out of the ordinary.

"What?" he asked looking back at Gon.

"I forgot to tell you" Gon said looking back at his face, "I found something earlier" he continued and Killua looked at him curiously.

* * *

**Disclaimer : I do not own HunterxHunter**.

**Side Note : Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry! I am so terribly sorry it took me forever to upload. I do have a good excuse though! I had a really big test that pretty much defined if I would graduate or not; add that with classes and a very physically demanding job and well... BUT now that I don't have to devote all of my free time to studying, I can go back to writing and obsessing over my boys. I've missed them greatly. **

**Thank you all new reviewers and I'm sorry once again for the delay and I hope most of you didn't just move on and forget about Pandora. Well, here's hoping. I know that lake bit seemed a little blurry as to where I'm going with it but I just couldn't help myself to some Gon and Killua slash. As you might have noticed, every time those two start fondling each other my chapter tend to get longer and well putting any extra information always seems hard. But worry not! I'll explain in the next chapter, which will not take me three blasted weeks to upload (I am really so sorry). **


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